Join us tonight at 9:00 EST for live coverage of TNA iMPACT!

- Also be sure to check out Glazer’s excellent coverage of last Sunday’s Hard Justice. And while you’re at it, Pulse gamer Mark B’s
recap live from New Joyzee, complete with pretty pictures. I’ve actually been to Sovereign Bank Arena for Trenton Devils hockey (of course rooting for my Cincinnati Cyclones).

- While Glazer was covering the PPV Sunday, some of us other Pulse staffers had a secret communication session via a chat room, and your favorite RAW recapper Paul Marshall joked that “at least I didn’t have to cover the XFL” in regard to covering Impact weekly. But is that a true statement, who holds the advantage? In depth analysis of this theory next week!

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TNA iMPACT – 8/14/08

- Your hosts are Don West (don’t forget that the Cream Count debuted last week!) & Mike Tenay

- Taped from Orlando, FL

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- Operator’s “Soul Crusher” is the theme du jour this week. That band really got far, eh? Do yourselves a favor and check out the Walkmen’s excellent new album “You & Me” for a good new music fix.

The Rock ‘N Rave Infection v. Christian Cage & Rhino

This makes about as much sense as last week’s main event gauntlet: it doesn’t. Rhino goes in control of Rave to start and tags in Christian and they deliver a double hip toss. Christian and Rock come in and Christian chops away, back in comes Rhino who shoulders him down. The heels crotch Rhino in the post while the ref argues with Christian. Double team heel isolation ensues on Rhino until he turns the tide via a spinebuster on Rave, Rock breaks up the pin. Semi-hot tag to Christian and an inverted DDT on Rave gets two. Second rope elbow sets up an Unprettier attempt, but Rock breaks that up with a big boot. Rhino dumps Rock and it’s GORE GORE GORE followed by the Frog Splash on Rave for the pin, and thus becoming the first TNA TV match to end peacefully and not include run-ins or post match brawling in quite some time. Kudos.

Winners: Christian Cage & Rhino

- Borash is with Kurt Angle backstage, who is so kind to speak even with the Beijing Olympics currently going on. He says Styles tried to break his neck not once, but twice. Luckily Sting interrupted before he did it a third time and ended his career for good. But Kurt gets to pick the match tonight, and it’s gonna be a “good ole Olympic challenge” and the winner gets his gold medal. Wow, they’re doing this angle again? Eh, I guess it’s fresh in another company.

- After commercials Borash is with AJ Styles to provide the answers. He made a promise that at Hard Justice Kurt Angle would not get up and he didn’t. Regarding Sting, he says he won’t be making an example out of him. He says Michael Phelps won’t be the only one going home with US gold because he’ll win Angle’s challenge tonight. Guess it was kind of mandatory for them to throw that in there.

- Lauren is with Matt Morgan. His two goals are to realize his full potential and to become the TNA World Heavyweight Champion no matter who they put up against them. Losing a tag match to the likes of Petey Williams and Tomko about a month ago probably wasn’t a good start, but that ain’t ’stoppin him!

Matt Morgan v. Johnny Devine

Just when Devine’s career couldn’t get any worse. He slaps the Blueprint to start, so he growls scaring Devine and forcing him to bail. Devine blocks a charge and Morgan gets crotched on the top rope, but he no sells that and the Hellavator finishes it quickly.

Winner: Matt Morgan

- Post match Team 3D hit the ring and pound on Morgan. DW says that this is because they see the potential in him. Abyss makes the save and has a stare down with Morgan. They shake on it.

- Time for this week’s installment of Karen’s Angle, with The Beautiful People as guests. They fake crying because no one likes them. Karen suggests they be nice to people. Kip James (sporting the old pink Mr. Ass tights) comes in to tell them they look stunning and acts homosexual. He calls Karen ugly thus rightfully ending the interview. Well this segment is going over well.

Sheik Abdul Bashir v. Jay Lethal

This is his debut and his necessary wacky TNA nickname is the “Middle Eastern Nightmare”. He cuts a promo in the ring. Just like we have known for years in whatever promotion going by whatever alias, he hates the USA and he hates getting patted down at airports. Lethal jumps him to start forcing him to bail where Lethal follows with a baseball slide and suicide dive, then hauls him back in for an axe handle for two. Bashir goes in control with a neckbreaker for two. Bashir fights off a backslide and applies a chin lock but Lethal elbows out and drops him with three short lariats. Back drop gets two. Bashir fights back with a jawbreaker but Lethal goes for a cradle, rolls through and lands a suplex for a close two. Bashir stabs him with some kind of spike he pulls out of his boot and DDTs him for the pin. And that finisher is apparently called the WMD. How original. Post match Sonjay Dutt comes out to add insult to injury.

Winner: Sheik Abdul Bashir

- Meanwhile in Booker’s pimped out locker room, he says he has a certain silver and black guitar on his mind, then asks to be excused.

- We now get exclusive coverage of Nash & Sting talking from last Sunday. It lasts about five second with Sting telling Kev “it’s now or never”.

Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash v. Team 3D

Joe starts with D’Von and takes him down quickly with a kick in the corner. D’Von pokes the eyes and tags in Ray and they get a double suplex for two. Joe snapmares him over and kicks the skull, then tags in Nash who adds some corner offense all the while maintaining slow as molasses status. D’Von comes in but runs into a sideslam for two as we head to commercials. We’re back and the heels are in control of Nash, Ray with a Boston Crab applied. Tag to D’Von and that allows the hot tag to Joe, and the house gets its cleaning. Leg lariat takes down Ray and he feeds D’Von to a Nash big boot for two. Nash gets dumped leaving 3D to get a double team neckbreaker on Joe for two. They set up for the 3D but Nash yanks Ray out leaving D’Von to fall victim to the Coquina Clutch, and that’s all she wrote. However, Joe attacks them with a chair afterward and then shoves the ref, so an announcement is made that the referee has reversed his decision and Team 3D wins? Yep.

Winners: Team 3D

Taylor Wilde v. Christy Hemme

Taylor goes in control to start but Christy does the Matrix to block an attack and go in control for a little bit. Taylor dodges the flying firecrotch guillotine allowing Taylor to slip behind and snap off a German suplex for the pin. Post match Awesome Kong attacks Taylor and then CREAMS Traci with a punch (CREAM COUNT: 1) but Gail Kim makes the save. Katie Kim, Gail’s sister, is at ringside. Kong gets a chair but Gail dropkicks it in her face then wacks her with it.

Winner: Taylor Wilde

- TNA Roughcuts time with Consequences Creed. Well, at least it isn’t Matt Morgan anymore.

- Hector Guererro goes off on a rant when asked about how Homicide is doing. Hernandez says they took more away from him than the tag belts, but his brother. After commercials, recap of Beer Money’s run so far.

James Storm v. Hernandez

Hernandez attacks on the floor before the bell then takes Beer Money out with a plancha. Back inside Storm goes in control via evil heel tactics and drops a knee for two. Storm locks in a rear choke and adds a high knee for two. Storm pauses to get cocky but gets an electric church for his troubles. Hernandez adds a back drop and overheard suplex for two. Jackie interruption allows Storm to get some kind of sweep out of the corner for two. Hernandez counters a suplex with a back drop and tries his finisher but Roode makes the save, but Hernandez catches him off the top with a powerbomb for the pin.

Winner: Hernandez

Kurt Angle v. AJ Styles – Olympic Challenge

The rules here are that there are three 2-minute periods, 2 points for a takedown, 2 points for a nearfall, most points win or a pin gets the win. Angle’s gold medal is on the line. The ring ropes have been removed.

First Period: Angle gets a single-leg takedown for a quick 2 points right off the bat. Another takedown via the leg gets another 2 points for Angle. About a minute and a half in Angle takes him down from behind to go up 6-0. Styles wards off a couple of other attempts as the minute expires.

Second Period: Angle goes to a hammerlock but Styles rolls through for a nearfall and a takedown to cut the deficit to 6-4 Angle. They wrestle it out and Styles falls to the floor. Back in Angle takes him down quickly to increase the lead to 8-4. Styles gets a cradle as time runs out which counts for another nearfall and takedown to make it tied 8-8.

Third Period: Styles goes for a hammerlock but Angle adds a cheap elbow “out of frustration” then takes him down for 2 points to regain the lead. A suplex sends Rudy Charles to the floor so Angle clotheslines Styles down. Lights go out, come back on and Angle has a bat, they go off again and Styles has a guitar, he wacks Angle with it for the pin and gets rewarded the gold medal as the mystery of Jarrett continues.

Winner: AJ Styles

End of show.