Today’s Episode: Prodigal

First of all, and I can’t believe I’m typing this, but I owe Randy Orton an apology. While I don’t think he necessarily deserves the heaps of praise that have been showered upon him since his return, he has gone from an overrated sack of crap to a fantastically vicious heel whose intelligence has multiplied roughly fifteen times from where it was previously, when those magical IQ numbers seemed to hover in shoe size territory. He’s no longer the master of chinlockery (well, as much), and he’s beginning to truly deserve the star treatment that he’s been receiving since, well, ever. I don’t know if I’ll ever be fond of the human being that stories have made him out to be, but everyone deserves a chance to grow up, and if having a baby girl at home has gotten him to start taking things seriously and not bring his despicable ring character to the real world with him, all the better. Enjoy your time at the top, Randy, before you need a year of “underexposure” like Cena went through after getting injured.

Even more insane, Randy Orton now leads one of my favorite stables! I’m a big fan of The Legacy, and while I’d like Sim Snuka and Manu to get a bit more love, perhaps they could be a sort of 21st Century “Samoan Wrecking Crew,” and start making a name for themselves regardless. I never thought either of them was that bad, so I don’t know what it is about them that’s causing WWE to throw them to the wind. With the way that WWE has been laying off workers, perhaps they should just try to stay under the radar for a bit until this blows over.

But like I said, I dig The Legacy, and if they toss in Harry Smith, then I’ll be completely set. You have the chiseled, sadistic Orton, at the top of his game and nigh unbeatable with a finisher that can be hit from anywhere and almost always guarantees a pin. You have two incredible rookies in Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase, loyal to their leader and seemingly on the path to join him at the top as power behind the throne, until one or both of them inevitably stab him in the back. Such things happen to all great kings, especially the young ones.

I like The Legacy, and so does WWE.

So why, I ask, is a 39-year old part time wrestler able to single-handedly annihilate the entire group?

For any of you that missed last night’s moderately entertaining Raw, Stephanie McMahon’s great vengeance against Randy Orton, the man who concussed her father only a week earlier, was not to fire him, or suspend him, or fine him some obscene price in the million dollar range. Instead, she felt firing him was “too easy,” and so she unleashed her secret weapon:

Shane McMahon.

Now, Shane, despite not being a trained wrestler, has always been capable of putting on entertaining matches, very often by taking insane bumps, jumping off high places, and occasionally performing high-flying moves that no one would ever expect from someone who, well, isn’t a trained wrestler. I like Shane, and he’s one of the McMahon characters that, once he stopped announcing, was someone that I normally wasn’t tired of. I think this will probably build to a one-off Randy Orton/Shane match at No Way Out, and that’s fine, because it will probably be a lot of fun, and it will make Orton an even less likable human being, and that’s good for the company, etc.

But are we seriously supposed to believe that Shane McMahon, 39-year old father of two and part-time wrestler, can beat up Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, and the focal point of the company, Randy Orton, with those little rabbit punches? Most of them didn’t even connect, and Randy sold the ones that did as if he were being hit with a hammer. If these three guys are the future of the company, why were they made to look like ineffectual jokes against a man that they should have easily been able to destroy with some simple gang level tactics?

In a night that was otherwise enjoyable, and in a “sport” that requires serious suspension of disbelief, WWE simply pushed that suspension too far, and it all just toppled off. Even if Shane had ONE friend or ally, anyone to help him with his fight with The Legacy it would have been sufficient. Two on one, while certainly not good odds, are odds that can be overcome, and one other person could have given a bit of help. Instead, The Legacy is made to look like what they’re supposed to be: kids who are riding on their parent’s coattails instead of earning anything.

The problem comes up when it’s pointed out that these men ARE seriously talented, and that they ARE the future of the company. Thus, this mystifying move is shown to be ill-informed, because if they can’t beat one angry Shane, how are they supposed to compete with a Shawn Michaels are a John Cena level “superface?”

Like the title suggests, the whole thing…prodigal.

Tags: breaking holds, Cody Rhodes, randy orton, Shane McMahon, ted dibiase, WWE