Welcome to “Interinactivity”. WrestleMania and Extreme Rules has come and gone, so I naturally assumed that I’d be writing something about Shaemus and how I was right a year in advance. But then again, I also naturally assumed that some people would have admitted that I was right – a year in advance no less – and that they were wrong.
Obviously, that hasn’t happened. But at the same time, almost everyone has pretty much or completely abandoned their support for the guy. Steven Gepp admits that Shaemus is generally treated with apathy by the audience. Gojira agrees finally that he’s not as over as WWE wants him to be, but still maintains that we can’t condemn his main event career. James Alsop is still holding steady – you gotta respect that.
Wally Kovacs made a good comment – that it’s still likely that Shaemus could end up as another Kozlov, Barrett (fantastic because a lot of people haven’t given up on Barrett yet either), or McIntyre. I agree with him. I also think that it’s insane that a Royal Rumble and WrestleMania-winning babyface World Champion could possibly end up like that.
Anyway, I was right. And I’m awesome. Blah blah, woof woof. Moving on.
I always forget to include e-mails when I do this column. I get some weird and fun stuff in the e-mail. So since everyone is probably a bit down about me being right all the time, I figured we’d have some fun.
Carl: First off kudos on the article and I agree with the opinions you have towards TNA. I’ve heard for a long time that if you are not a “somebody” in TNA that they refuse to pay for anything. I think as a company they should be taken to court by a “somebody” to teach them a lesson that you can’t be running a business this way, especially a business that is as physically demanding as professional wrestling.
Blair: Yeah, people keep waiting for this to happen. Especially since there’s been plenty of TNA scandals along these lines over the years. That Daffney thing was the tip of the iceberg. Take a look into what happened with Konnan and TNA – they paid him a million dollars or so rather than going to court with him. Allegedly, the only reason that Karen Angle was ever brought back on (and paid) as an on-air talent was because Dixie Carter’s idiot husband sexually harassed her… AFTER she had already left Kurt for Jeff. And the list goes WAY beyond what I’ve mentioned here.
I’ve always found it odd that Dixie Carter, who seems like an otherwise smart woman, has anything to do with TNA. Your point about “a somebody” needs to take them to court, is nice… and I agree that would be great… but it doesn’t need to be “somebody”. It can be anybody. The problem is, MOST of the people involved with TNA usually doesn’t have a lot of other places to go, so don’t want to burn their bridges. It’s sad.
R. Getta: This is a bit of an odd question, and I know you don’t know, but i wanted to see how you answered it. At WCW Uncensored ’95, Hulk Hogan wrestled Van Vader in a Leather Strap Match. Partway through the match, there were some run-ins. Hogan put the strap on Flair and proceeded to touch all 4 corners, and WCW called it a win. What happened here, if you know? Any rumours out there? It’s just kind of a funny thing i always wondered.
Blair: No way! I never get questions like this. This is awesome. And believe it or not, I actually remembered the match you’re talking about because it was so odd. I had to look it up to make sure it was the right one, and sure enough, it was. There actually was a story that came out in shoot interviews about this, but it’s one of those forgotten footnotes that everyone forgot about or never knew in the first place. But it’s actually kind of interesting.
It’s well-reported that Hogan and Vader did NOT get along. As legend has it, Hogan went right up to Vader some time before the PPV, and told Vader… directly… flat-out… that he was NEVER going to lay down for him. Right to Vader’s face. Bizarrely out of character for Hogan to go the direct route, but there you go. One can only assume he was drunk on the sheer amount of creative control in his contract, and just figured he didn’t even need to bother going about these things in a clandestine way anymore.
Anyway, Vader was a smart guy – had business interests outside of wrestling, and never cared much whether he won or lost. He wasn’t necessarily well-liked backstage, but also was not a guy known for deft political maneuvering. For whatever reason though, whether it be his mood or the fact that Hogan pissed him off, he stood his ground and dug in his heels. And he flat-out told Hulk that there was no way HE was laying down for Hogan either. The situation wasn’t resolved, so Flair, being the WCW company man that he was to the very marrow of his bone, was brought out to lose the match on Vader’s behalf.
That’s the story as people have told it. If anyone reading this is the least bit interested in looking up the match, even for historical relevance, you can find it on YouTube. But I’d advise you not to bother. It’s not worth your time, and is as bad as it sounds. Just be happy you learned something you didn’t know before.
By the way… a strap match as the main-event of a PPV. Amazing. Has anyone EVER managed to see a GOOD strap match? There’s something for you guys to do. Look that up.
Robert: Ok. I’m a big Chris Jericho fan. LOVE HIM. I’m a 100% straight heterosexual male, but I’d be lying not to admit that my dick flinched just a little bit when I found out he’d be in a match with CM Punk at Wrestlemania. But Chris plays the heel. A hell of a good one. It is my opinion that many people WANT to cheer him, but he’s just such a DICK that he figures out ways to keep those cheers at bay (For the most part; he got pops when he wrestled John Cena a few times but I’m pretty sure Hitler could wrestle Cena and still get some cheers. “Let’s go Hitler, Let’s go! *clap clap clap*”. I’m sorry… that was bad. That was… I’m sorry.). My point is, when Jericho called out Punk’s dad as a drunk, poured alcohol down Punk’s throat and then broke the bottle over his head, and then pissed on him (he did piss on him, right?), a big, fanboy loving part of me loved it and grinned. But another smaller part of me that suspends disbelief because I like fake sports because they make me happy, was all like, “Damn, Chris”. My question to you is… Who is the better heel? Is it Daniel Bryan that does so great a job that people cheer him, or is it Chris Jericho who does so great a job that people boo him. They’re both respected and their work is appreciated in parallel ways, but they produce different crowd reactions. Is the stronger heel the guy that people appreciate his efforts or is it the guy that actually manipulates the crowd to his wishes? I know what my opinion is which, of course, is the correct answer; but what is yours?
Blair: Tough call. If you go just by results, then Jericho is the better heel because he succeeded in getting crazy heat even though he’s well-liked, for the most part, by the crowd. Looking at it further though, I would say that they’re different types of heels – Jericho is a credible heel, and Bryan for the most part, until recently, was playing an un-credible heel, who couldn’t win matches, etc. Both guys are insanely talented – and my opinion of Bryan is quite high – but I just don’t think it gets much better than Jericho heel-wise.
E. Gareth: Hey Blair. Do you know the status of Spanish Angel and if there is any interest from WWE in signing him?
Blair: Spanish Angel from Da Baldies in ECW? Wow. No idea where this one came from. I’d actually assume this was a question from Spanish Angel himself, if it weren’t for asking if I knew his “status”.
I guess the short answer to the “status” question is “alive”. If he’s dead, no one’s bothered to enter it on WikiPedia. Also according to WikiPedia:
Since 2007, he has dedicated himself to shedding a lot of the weight he had gained since the original ECW went out of business, and he is near the best shape of his life today.
That last part is an odd “fact” to have on WikiPedia. I know that WWE categorically has NO interest in Angel, though. Why the fuck would they?
G. Otta: You are way too hard on wrestlers who return to work in TNA just because they aren’t wanted (or don’t want to work) in WWE. Every time one of them shows up, it makes big waves in TNA, which is the very point. Take a look at Ken Anderson – an active wrestler in TNA,wrongly released by WWE, in the middle-upper TNA card for 2 years now, producing value for the company. The other thing I think could work is bringing back wrestlers who have been gone for a longer period of time – not guys who just RECENTLY left. That way its more surprising when they first show up. WWE could do this as well, like they’ve done with Prince Albert – he was gone for years. Imagine if WWE or TNA brought back The Wall – in 2012. The Wall was a phenomenon in WCW, was pushed immediately into big feuds with Hulk Hogan. He was never seen in wrestling after WCW went under. Put together a story about how he’s been in seclusion for 10 years, and is meaner and more brutal than ever, and you’ve got a legit foil for Cena, or whoever is atop the TNA card, who has PPV matches against Hogan on his record. If TNA brought him in, they could even use him against Hogan again to play off their past history. Granted, I’m just using The Wall as an example. I don’t know his current whereabouts. I’m just using his name to make a point. A point you and others should consider – just because someone isn’t in WWE yet doesn’t make them terrible. The Wall is the perfect example of that.
Blair: Yeah, well, here’s the problem with your little idea for The Wall.
I don’t mean his career is dead. I don’t mean he’s dead in the water. I mean he’s dead. Wearing-a-tux-in-a-coffin dead. Well… or, I guess he could have been cremated. Or maybe they buried him naked and sold the tux to buy a trampoline for the backyard. The possibilites are endless really.
Regardless, he had a heart attack. In Japan.
And he died.
NINE years ago.
And this idea you have about bringing The Wall to TNA? The Wall WAS in TNA. He was named Malice. There’s a reason you didn’t know about that either. It’s because you don’t – or, more accurately, didn’t – give a shit about The Wall. If you had, you would have heard about it and would have known that, or, at the very least, would have known that he died.
In fact, that’s HOW he died. You killed him by not caring. It hurt his heart so badly that he had a heart attack.
And he died.
You’re a murderer.
Look, I’m not saying that you’re dumb for not realizing it, but it IS the reason WHY your idea didn’t and doesn’t work, and why bringing in these kinds of guys hardly ever makes a difference, especially in the long-term.
That’s the point. A point you’ve actually just managed to make perfectly… while you were trying to make the exact opposite point.
Congratulations. The angel that is The Wall just lost it’s wings. You insensitive bastard.
Well, that’s it for another thrilling edition of “Interinactivity”. Hope you all enjoyed. Thanks as always for the comments and e-mails – keep them coming, and have a great weekend.
I’ll be in my trailer.
Tags: Blair A. Douglas, chris jericho, Daffney, Daniel Bryan, dixie carter, ECW, extreme rules, Hulk Hogan, Interinactivity, Konnan, Ric Flair, Shaemus, sheamus, Spanish Angel, Strap match, The Wall, TNA, Uncensored, Vader, WCW, WWE