Sorry for the delay in getting this to you, but I dislocated my finger last night. Thankfully, the EMT’s that treated Shawn Michaels got me some crutches, and I’m ready to contribute. I’m as tough as a $3 steak, I tell you. Let’s get to it!
1.) I have to wonder what is the more awkward moment in wrestling – when Justin Roberts is waiting for the music to hit, or having to stand in the ring after your entrance and then wait through a commercial break.
2.) Good lord, Daniel Bryan is the best thing going right now. I’m almost tempted to have the WWE put him into a feud with Tensai and see if THAT will get the big goof over.
3.) Ryback has been a pleasant surprise – and make no mistake about it. He IS over. It’s probably time for Kevin Nash to show up and REALLY put the feud into high gear.
4.) I realize this is a loaded question considering the subject matter – but what the hell was Roddy Piper on last night? The final season of LOST wasn’t as big a cluster@#$! as that “Piper’s Pit” segment.
5.) My three current favorite wrestlers in one match (Ziggler, Jericho and the Miz). It also got a LOT of time – an added bonus. It is amazing what happens when you give guys who can really go plenty of time to develop a story and showcase their athleticism.
6.) On the flip side…the Divas match. Remember that old saying “be careful what you ask for” when people were complaining about 60 second Divas matches? Last night was Exhibit A on why those aren’t always a bad thing.
7.) Holy crap, John Cena! You need to stick to the “Five Moves of Doom” (™ Scott Keith) – that high knee/bulldog combo looked like Bryan was going to need Dr. Issac Yankem, DDS. Even Jackie Gayda was shaking her head at how awful that one was.
8.) A heel gets a clean win over a big-name face – THAT is how you elevate Damian Sandow. Somewhere, Ziggler is crying over his tanning creams and hoping his push isn’t coming 6 months too late.
9A.) What kind of Chief Operating Officer waits until six days before the match to make sure a minor detail like HAVING THE CONTRACT SIGNED is addressed? Something tells me that Dana White wouldn’t pull a stunt like that.
9B.) My God – THAT is how you sell a match via promo, Paul Heyman! I would love to have Heyman narrate while I was doing everyday tasks and errands:
“This man – he is going to go to the DMV – and he’s on a quest. He’s on a quest…for a new driver’s license! He is going to tear through the fabric of his soul until he reaches the FIBER of the DMV – and then…oh, and then…then he will tear through the license bureau like a hot knife through butter. I cannot be responsible for what happens to the DMV if you try to prevent my client from achieving his destiny. I can only warn you…that someone is going to get hurt.”
10.) Don’t worry, Shawn – I heard the cure for an arm broken by a kimura lock administered by Brock Lesnar is to attend a comic convention two days later. You’ll be good as new.
Follow me on Twitter @the_ryan_brown to leave comments or criticisms. Thanks for reading!