No Chance – The 2012 Holiday Gift Guide
by Joel Leonard on December 5, 2012

As the last month of the year begins, it brings with it a season of shopping. Yes most holiday shopping began on Black Friday but that doesn’t mean that shopping is over. (As I’m sure the television commercials won’t let you forget.) So what should you get for that WWE fan in your family? Or perhaps for yourself if nobody else will understand why you want wrestling things? How about one of the things from this handy shopping guide? (Links included for the buying)


CM Punk – Best in the World: The documentary focusing on everyone’s favorite current wrestler is probably the biggest “must have” item on the list. Easily one, if not the very best Superstar DVD to ever be produced by the WWE the documentary covers everything from Punk’s early matches all the way through last year’s shoot promo. And the match selection is second to none and even includes some of his best ROH matches.

WrestleMania XXVIII: After last year’s “meh” of a WrestleMania, this is more or less what I was hoping to get last year. An Undertaker vs. Triple H match that truly feels like it will go down as a classic. An actual Rock and Cena match, like I wanted last year. And somehow with all that CM Punk and Jericho may have still had the match of the night. This is much more in line with the kind of PPV that’s worth shelling out money to watch again on DVD.

The Attitude Era: I haven’t seen the documentary on this one yet, but if WWE was able to show the un-blurred WWF logo, then it’s almost worth getting for that fact alone. That being said, this is a time period fondly remembered by many people and for good reason. And a plus factor is that this Doc will focus on all of the truly great moments from the company’s most famous period while perhaps glossing over the week to week things we would like to forget.

You Think You Know Me – The Story of Edge: Even having the earlier Edge DVD, this was a must for me.  Edge has been a longtime favorite and this DVD really feels like a genuine career retrospective. And because of that It’s really worth getting the Blu Ray for the extra match and because it has him announcing his retirement. This DVD truly captures the man’s career as a whole.


A Most Mizerable Christmas: I’ve always liked these little children books from Foley. They’re never anything to extravagant, but still, usually a nice simple rhyme scheme that can be enjoyed by the kiddies. And entertaining in-jokes are usually hidden in the artwork. Plus I like to think that now that Miz is a good guy, his face turn came from his learning the true meaning of Christmas.

WWE Encyclopedia Updated and Expanded: I actually didn’t even know that this book was out until it was advertized on the show Monday but I’m putting on the list anyway. First of all, it lets me have more than one entry in the Books section and second of all, early reviews of the book have said that it is incredibly through, with names that even the most avid fan might not remember.


CM Punk GTS Yellow Shirt: At first this shirt was a bit off putting with its giant Power Rangers style lighting bolt in the middle, but it’s actually started to grow on me in recent weeks. It’s still no “Best in the World” shirt, or the grey one that he was wearing earlier this year (which you can find here) but it’s currently the most up to date shirt, so if you want to stay with the times…

John Cena 10 Years Strong Shirt: I want to put the Green Shirt from WrestleMania on here since it follows the Fruity Pebble pattern of changing colors every six months, but it’s no longer sold in WWE’s store. It’s still new enough that it’s fairly easy to find for sale around the Internet, but officially the shirt to support Cena is this one. (I made sure that this link goes to the kid’s sizes for this one.)

Hugging is all the Rage shirt: I was once facing a dilemma. I wanted to support Team Friendship with a shirt, but I didn’t want anything with the far inferior name Team Hell No on it. Fortunately, this shirt exists. I don’t exactly get why Kane is represented by a teddy bear, but I don’t really care. This is the shirt for the best tag team out there.

Damien Sandow shirt: Few shirts better represent the character of their superstar than this one. Short of an official Damien Sandow bathrobe, this is the best piece of clothing to condescendingly yell at ignoramuses in.

Video Games

WWE 13: Really it’s the one game this year that’s worth looking at. I usually advocate waiting a few years between these yearly updates rather than spend another fifty bucks each year for what is essentially the same game, but after spending some time playing Sanders copy of the game, I am probably going to be picking this one up despite grabbing WWE 12 last year. Where 12 lacked any great 1-player mode, the Attitude Era part of WWE 13 does take great strides toward having a worthwhile solo mode. Like any version of this game it’s always going to be better if you have someone to play with, but the fact that were heading in the right direction is something worth getting excited about. (The link goes to an Xbox 360 version of the game but I have faith that if you want it you can easily find copies of the game for PS3 and Wii, which it is also available on.)

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Joel Leonard

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  • Steven Gepp
  • James A

    Cheeky correction – the Punk DVD doesn’t include any ROH matches. There are some clips of moments against Joe and Cabana during the documentary, but nothing more than that, sadly.

    I second your appreciation for the Sandow t-shirt, though!

  • raj

    Pank and Jericho did not have the MOTN, UT-HHH did, thats not a matter of opinion, it’s just FACT!

  • Steven

    I can see the validity in sports entertainment lovers going for Cena-Rock over Punk-Jericho, and that’s cool. But 2 old guys playing lay around on the mat for 3/4 of a match does not a MOTN make. Again, your mileage may vary. So it is an opinion. Like it’s my OPINION that Sheamus is a boring a wrestler, as opposed to the FACT there is no wrestler in the WWE called Pank.

  • James A

    It’d be awesome if there was, though. That’s the kinda name that really opens doors. Think of the possible gimmicks!

    – He could lie flat in strange places to annoy his opponents, except instead of planking he’d call it “Panking”.

    – He also masquerades as a leading television newsreader. A… Pankorman… you might say…

    – He could threaten people by saying, “Hey, I’m gonna make you hurt so badly, I hope you brought some pankillers!” That’d be totally badass.

    – Oh wait… his finisher could be CALLED the “Pankiller”. That’s gold right there.

    – Or – and this is a good one – he could start a female protest movement in the WWE in support of Divas’ rights, and start calling himself – wait for it – Emmeline PANKhurst. That’d be great. And maybe he is actually a she? I dunno. Could work.

    – He could hit people with P(l)anks of wood?

    – I kinda made that last joke already, didn’t I?

    – Vince, buddy, just get on with it and hire me. Go on.

  • Steven

    Would he have to PANKake in every match?

    But seriously, a mate has just informed me that Pank means to either tap someone’s bum, or that it’s the technical term for human meat (like pork for a pig)… but only if eaten while the person is alive.
    You know, CM Pank just patting everyone on the buttocks would be quite… disturbing. That’s the word.

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