A .98 rating. That’s not the start of a war, that’s the start of my laughter.

You know what? WWE NXT was actually pretty good.

The Survivor Series and ECW have been eliminated.

The dog has been eating my wrestling column.

Who knew that Hogan and Bischoff’s master plan was to turn TNA into a comedy of errors?

After 2 weeks away due to holidays, I come back to this?

Bret the Hitman Hart is coming back. And we want him to be us.

As a fishing expedition, TNA’s Monday night show is a good idea. But what if Dixie Carter and Hulk Hogan actually believe what they’re saying about it starting a new Monday Night War? Quite frankly, that would be terrifying.

The WWE has finally started putting some new faces in the World title scene on Raw… but is it really someone we want to see?

Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair come to blows at their Australian press conference, and it makes the Australian news as a real fight? That’s kind of AWESOME.

CM Punk vs Jeff Hardy. CM Punk vs the Undertaker. CM Punk vs… Scott Armstrong and R-truth?

Kofi Kingston might not be getting lost in the shuffle anymore, and it’s about time.

Well there’s only one real thing to talk about this week, isn’t there.

I thought I’d pay a little tip of the hat to Paul Heyman and ECW, and make the topic of this weeks column a three way dance.

The idea seems to be that every one on the roster should be as well rounded a performer as The Rock. Which is an understandable goal, but let’s face it; much like Captain Lou, The Rock was one of a kind. What both men had in common was charisma. And you can’t teach charisma.

If you have a Hell In A Cell, the fans expect blood, and they also expect some sort of Cell related action beyond the normal cage match staples. Of course, when you have 3 Hell In A Cell’s, you obviously can not have all three be blood soaked stunt fests. If you have a Hell In A Cell, the fans expect blood, and they also expect some sort of Cell related action beyond the normal cage match staples. Of course, when you have 3 Hell In A Cell’s, you obviously can not have all three be blood soaked stunt fests. But with three matches, spaced out through out the show, you could space out what’s expected through those three matches. But that’s not what happened.

SNL hasn’t been consistently good, let alone a “stay home and plan your night around it” part of our culture, in years. Is that really the comparison they want for their flagship show, for the show they’ve gone out of their way to push on us as better than all their other shows?

Nearly every single segment is presented in rapid fire clip form, which makes it as head spinning a watch as any Russo written episode of Raw. Instead of Crash TV, it’s Crash DVD, and that’s not the quality I’ve come to expect from WWE dvds.

Disclaimer: I’m writing this column a good week in advance, because I will be away for the week and have no guarantee of Internet access. So, much as it pains me to stay out of the fray, I will not be writing anything about Jeff Hardy and his recent arrest. Instead, I have a confession to make.

If one looks at the last two No Way Out ppv’s, both of which featured two Elimination Chamber matches, having multiple HIAC matches might not seem like such a bad idea. But the reason the WWE can get away with doing multiple Elimination Chamber matches in one night, is because the nature of the Elimination Chamber is competition, not a grudge match. It’s closer to the traditional Survivor Series match or King of the Ring tournament than it is the War Games.

For those final minutes, he was no longer just Cody Rhodes, replaceable cookie cutter flunky. He was Cody Rhodes, the young wrestler who idolizes the despicable champion to the point that an attack on his father leaves him unable to act against his idol. It’s the type of abusive villain/toadie relationship seen in everything from Lloyd Alexander’s The Chronicles of Prydain series to the Joker and Harley Quinn in Batman.

Now that Punk is a full blown heel, the kid factor is less of an issue. Ironically, the now child friendly WWE wants the kids to boo the superstar with the drug free message, and boo him they shall. But teenagers and adults are far more likely to find Punk’s heel character cool. And while they’re old enough that they’re not going to play “monkey see monkey do” because of a wrestling character, there are still some who have taken up the mantle of Straight Edge.

I still distinctly remember how hard I laughed when I first saw Fit Finlay’s one shoulder pad and mullet combo, and how quickly I stopped once his ring work started.