Inside Pulse Wrestling » randy orton Wrestling news, rumors, reviews and commentary, from WWE to TNA to ROH and everything in between... Tue, 02 Sep 2014 05:38:43 +0000 en-US hourly 1 Wrestling news, rumors, reviews and commentary, from WWE to TNA to ROH and everything in between... Inside Pulse Wrestling no Wrestling news, rumors, reviews and commentary, from WWE to TNA to ROH and everything in between... Inside Pulse Wrestling » randy orton My (10) Thoughts: WWE RAW 9.1.14 (John Cena, Roman Reigns, Randy Orton, Seth Rollins) Tue, 02 Sep 2014 05:11:28 +0000 WWE Raw Header - 2014


1~ I’m a bit disappointed that Jericho’s Highlight Reel immediately turned into the “clusterf*ck promo” segment that WWE’s been falling back to lately. I have no idea why they’re now threatening John Cena’s “contractually signed” rematch versus Brock Lesnar but something like this usually happens when something unexpected has come up. Is John Cena more injured than everyone really thought? Or are they now backpedaling from the destruction John Cena suffered at SummerSlam & now they think there needs to be more babyfaces in the match? I have no clue what they’re thinking about for Night Of Champions but it seems that things might be in flux.

2~ I’ve never wanted to see anyone wrestle more than Dolph Ziggler in that tag match. I guess that means The Miz is making this gimmick work but I was more interested in his new “makeup artist” than I was in seeing The Miz (or Damien Miz-Dow) get in the ring. I know it’s a long shot but how good would a program be between Dolph Ziggler and Cesaro if Cesaro won the US title & they had to unify the titles in a “best of seven” program?

3~ I don’t know how I feel the Nikki Bella videos. It definitely seems like a very passive aggressive way to hurt Brie in a way that she couldn’t respond. Yeah, yeah, it’s all fake and whatever you’d like to say but I liked being able to suspend my disbelief (at least a little bit) especially when Stephanie McMahon was involved.

4~ So are the Big Show & Mark Henry “The World’s Largest Tag Team” or is Mark Henry feuding with Rusev? I’d prefer them as a tag team than another pointless Rusev feud. Truly though, has anyone gained anything from facing Rusev? Hell, Jack Swagger moved from Rusev to BO DALLAS?! I can’t wait for someone to end this foreign experiment.

5~ Sorry Bo, Jack Swagger is no one’s favorite wrestler. He’s like the Aquaman of the WWE.

6~ Nikki Bella seems to Stephanie McMahon’s new poodle & giving her a Divas title match was like finding a new squeaky toy. Nikki’s promo are becoming higher and higher pitched & she needs to get that under control. As for the segment a whole, did it remind anyone else of the segment that opened the show? Yup, they just followed the exact same formula except the Divas Champion was actually involved. We’ve had some good and some bad tonight but these type of promos just bring my opinion of the show right down.

7~ Hey! Check out WWE promoting a match a whole week away! I’m so happy for them and hope they can continue down this fruitful path.

8~ It’s pretty damn awesome that Gold & Stardust have turned heel. The very first thing I thought of when I saw Stardust, I said “Damn, that’s creepy.” Goldust’s heel character may be a little rusty but Cody has been a heel for most of his career. He also has the experience performing as a creepy character if you think back to his plastic mask & paper bag days. That time was some of the best work Cody Rhodes has ever done. I think we’d be naïve to think that he’d be able to capture that magic again but hopefully we’ll get enough of it to make this feud interesting.

9~ Everything that has happened in this main event match is really backing up my theory that Cena may be more injured than anyone has reported. Sure he finally got his hot tag but then he couldn’t even make the cover and instead tagged out to Roman Reigns to hit the spear for the finish. Everything about that match seemed awkward and a little off. I don’t know, I could be seeing ghosts where there are none but I’m curious to see what happens to the Night Of Champions main event.

10. Damn, I know Widro would give me a hard time for not hitting 10 thoughts so instead I’ll include some new work done by our friend, Rob Schamberger:

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Two Matches Planned For 09/08/2014 WWE Monday Night Raw, Michael Sam Stunt Tue, 02 Sep 2014 05:08:56 +0000 WWE has announced two marquee matches for next week’s Monday Night Raw, both rematches from WWE Summerslam.

Steel Cage Match
Chris Jericho vs. Bray Wyatt

Roman Reigns vs. Randy Orton.

In addition, WWE did a publicity stunt and invited former NFL Ram Michael Sam to Raw to “address the fans”. It’s still unclear whether Sam is part of this stunt or this is WWE trying to make news.×250.jpg×120.jpg

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WWE Monday Night RAW LIVE Results For 9/1/14: Randy Orton On The Highlight Reel Mon, 01 Sep 2014 23:46:17 +0000 It’s a holiday edition of RAW tonight. Most of the time that doesn’t mean good things. The only thing really advertised for tonight is Randy Orton appearing on Chris Jericho’s Highlight Reel. What else is in store? Follow along to find out.

The Highlight Reel: Victim of Budget Cuts

RAW started with Chris Jericho in the ring. He said it’s ironic that his guest on Labor Day is someone who has never worked in his life. It’s someone that had everything handed to him on a silver platter. Jericho went to introduce Orton but the entire Authority came out. Jericho said he wasn’t expecting Orton to bring out his law firm of Sellout, Suck Up and Schnozz. HHH said Jericho has never grown up, figuratively and literally. HHH said he had important business to take care of. Jericho said HHH never has important business unless his wife is in jail. HHH said Jericho should be thanking him for making this the most important highlight reel ever. HHH said he has watched Lesnar/Cena numerous times and it might not be best for business to do Cena/Lesnar again. Jericho asked who he would give the rematch too. Orton said there is only one man and that is the 12 time World Champion. Kane said it should be him and Rollins said it should be him since he is the future. Jericho then talked about getting the Title shot before John Cena came out.

Cena said just because HHH’s best friends Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels said that he can’t beat Brock Lesnar doesn’t mean that he won’t. Cena said he invoked his rematch clause and HHH approved it, which means if he doesn’t get it then he will sue HHH  in court and end up running the company himself. HHH said he can’t believe this is what John Cena has come too. He says as COO, he knows what he has to do and he does what is best for business every single day. And he doesn’t think John Cena as WWE Champion is good for business anymore, neither is John Cena’s career ending at Night of Champions. Seth said to let him have his rematch, because there is always a Plan B. Orton wanted a rematch too. Jericho said since Wrestlemania Orton has had 4000 rematches and won like never. Jericho talked about Orton losing to Roman Reigns. Orton said if Reigns were hear he would beat the crap out of him right now.

Reigns came out and said here he is. Reigns said just like he thought, all talk. Reigns said Rollins must be pissed from when he almost crushed his skull last week. Reigns says his name should be in the WWE Title picture. HHH made a six man tag: Kane, Rollins, Orton vs Cena, Reigns, Jericho. HHH said he would be watching at ringside later and seeing who would prove their worth. After Rollins tried to hit Reigns with the MITB Briefcase but Reigns ducked and laid him out.

Wrestling Needs More Stunt Doubles

Dolph Ziggler and Sheamus vs Cesaro and Miz. Cesaro landed an early uppercut on Ziggler then hit Ziggler’s elbows on himself. Ziggler countered and hit a dropkick. Ziggler went after Miz but Miz went to his chair at ringside and was given make-up by someone and Sandow. Cesaro regained control and tagged in Miz. Miz landed a couple of boots and went to a headlock. Ziggler escaped and connected on a hip toss. Miz bailed. Ziggler tagged in Sheamus who chased Miz down. Sheamus hit a shoulder in the corner then a running high knee. Sheamus tossed Miz over the ropes and landed his rope punches. Sheamus then hit a rolling senton for two. Cesaro ended up making a blind tag and hit a drop kick on Sheamus into commercial.

Back from break Cesaro slapped Sheamus which got him all riled up, but Cesaro recovered and hit a slam off the second rope for two. They went to the top. Sheamus hit a headbutt knocking Cesaro off then hit a battering ram. Ziggler got the hot tag. He hit a splash and swinging neckbreaker on Miz. Ziggler hit a DDT but Cesaro broke up the count. Sheamus then clotheslined Cesaro over the top. Ziggler went for the Fameasser but Miz escaped and sent his stunt double Sandow in. The ref stopped it but Ziggler still hit the ZigZag on Sandow. But Miz came in from behind and hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the win.

WINNERS: The Miz and Cesaro

Growing Up Bella: Nikki went to the prom with this guy Ryan. But later on in the night, she found him in the parking lot with Brie.

Cameron, Eva Marie and Rosa Mendes vs Summer Rae, Layla and Naomi ended after a minute when they all started fighting.

Haven’t We Seen This A Lot Recently?

Big Show and Mark Henry vs Erik Rowan and Luke Harper. Henry landed some punches then hit a splash in the corner. Harper distracted Henry which allowed Rowan to knock him off the second rope. Harper came in and hit a clothesline into commercial. The Wyatts remained in control back from break. Rusev and Lana walked to the ring. Henry hit a boot on Harper then tagged in Big Show. Show knocked Harper to the outside but Harper took out Show’s knee and he went into the barricade. Back in the ring Harper hit some kicks then tagged in Rowan. The Wyatts worked over Big Show until Show blocked a second bodyslam attempt by Rowan and hit a DDT. Mark Henry got the hot tag. He hit a powerslam on Harper but Rowan broke up the pin. Show and Rowan brawled to the outside. Henry went for the World’s Strongest Slam but Rusev came in and hit Henry with a kick to cause a DQ. Harper and Rowan tried coming in with chairs afterwards but Show thwarted them.

WINNERS via DQ: Big Show and Mark Henry

Growing Up Bella Part 2: Nikki passed her driver’s test, Brie didn’t. Brie one night took the car out and crashed it and gave the police Nikki’s license.

Paul Heyman came out. Heyman said Cena has been showing signs of over-compensatory behavior. Heyman said Lesnar emasculated John Cena at SummerSlam. He said John Cena has not listened to reason over the last few weeks. He said HHH sees Cena as a cash cow that will be milked for the last time at Night of Champions. He said you could stack the locker room together and multiply it by infinity and it still doesn’t equal half of what Cena will be in store for at Night of Champions.

Who Bets Their Life Savings On Pro Wrestling?

Jack Swagger vs Curtis Axel. Swagger hit some knees in the corner then tossed Axel across the ring. Axel hit a shot to the ribs and continued to work on the ribs of Swagger. Axel hit a dropkick sending Swagger to the outside. Zeb gave some words of motivation to Swagger and he came back into the ring and started a comeback. He went for the Swagger Bomb but Axel got his feet up. Swagger saw it and applied the Patriot Lock. Axel tapped out.

WINNER: Jack Swagger

Bo Dallas was on stage. There were three people with him who Bo said were some of the people he let down by losing at SummerSlam. Richie bet his life savings on Swagger at SummerSlam and lost. Angelo was so upset that he lost his citizenship test and is being deported back to Italy. Swagger used to be Jennifer’s son Stuart’s favorite wrestler, but now be wants to be Vladimir Putin. Bo said all they had to do is BO-lieve to get their lives back on track.

Adam Rose beat Titus O’Neil after the bunny from the Rosebuds attacked Slater, causing a distraction.

Growing Up Bella: Brie almost didn’t graduate high school, so Nikki took her place during her exams so she could “pass.”

Rusev made quick work of Zack Ryder. Afterwards, Mark Henry came out but Rusev bailed. Henry said he’s scared of what he might do if he gets his hands on Rusev. Henry said he just opened the international wing of the hall of pain and Rusev will be the first inductee.

Attempt #1 To Save The Bella Storyline

Steph said she had to come out there and congratulate Nikki on being able to come out and tell her side of the story. Nikki thanked Steph for letting her have the opportunity to let everything off her chest. Steph said Brie continues to take the spotlight from Nikki but as a businesswoman, Steph is proud of Nikki. Steph said Nikki is the face of the Divas Division that she is looking for and she is granting Nikki a match for the Divas Title. Brie came out and asked if this was what everything was all about. She destroyed her family for a Divas Title shot. Nikki said that once her goat faced husband sees through Brie too he will divorce her.

AJ decided to come out. She said she didn’t know if Steph forgot the concept of #1 Contender but she never got her rematch. She said to let the Bellas settle their differences on their own time and leave the Divas Title to her. Paige came out and said that with everything going on she needed to be out here. Nikki said she would forgive Brie if she just quit. She said that if she loves her as a sister she would just go. Nikki continued to yell at Brie until Brie finally shoved Nikki down, and also right into Paige. AJ grabbed the Title and skipped around until Steph told her to give the Title back. AJ did then skipped away.

Jimmy Uso vs Goldust. Before the match Goldust tried apologizing for their actions last week but the Usos attacked them. Goldust threw Jimmy hard into the corner. Jimmy ducked a clothesline and came back with one of his own. He hit a Samoan Drop followed by a butt splash and crescent kick. Stardust but Goldust’s leg on the rope. Jimmy hit a dive to the outside on Stardust but Goldust caught him coming back into the ring with a kick then the Final Cut for the win. After the match they attacked Jey and used a chair on the injured leg of Jey.

Michael Sam has been invited to RAW next week.

Cena Looked Constipated Half The Match

Main event time. Reigns and Ortons started.  Reigns bounced out of the corner and hit a clothesline. Reigns knocked Kane off the apron then tossed Rollins into the ring. Orton tried stopping him but Reigns cleared the ring into commercial. Back from break Kane hit a DDT on Reigns and tagged in Orton. Orton and Reigns exchanged blows before Reigns hit a clothesline then a Samoan Drop for two. Reigns tried going to the top but Orton stopped him and hit a backbreaker. Rollins tagged in and slammed the head of Reigns off the apron then into the barricade. In the ring the heels continued to work over Reigns. Reigns finally got away and made the tag to Jericho.

Jericho hit a running bulldog and lionsault onto Rollins. Jericho then applied the Walls but Orton broke it up. Reigns hit a Superman Punch on Orton, Kane hit a chokeslam on Reigns but Cena hit the AA on Rollins. Rollins hit a springboard knee off the ropes on Cena. Jericho and Rollins exchanged pinfall attempts into commercial.

Back from break the heels this time had control over Jericho. Orton hit a powerslam. Rollins came in and went to the top but Jericho caught him coming off with a dropkick. Kane prevented the tag and hit a sidewalk slam. The heels went back to having control over Jericho. Jericho knocked Orton off the top and hit a crossbody. Kane stopped the hot tag at first but Jericho escaped a tombstone and tagged in Cena. Cena cleared the ring and ended up hitting the AA on Kane. He looked over to HHH at ringside and asked if that was good enough. Reigns then hit a Spear on Kane to pick up the win.

WINNERS: John Cena, Roman Reigns and Chris Jericho

After the match Cena hit the AA on Rollins onto the table.


Miz/Cesaro vs Sheamus/Dolph Ziggler: Nice little tag match. Miz’s act is actually getting better over the last few weeks. I like the addition of Sandow as his stunt double. Good action throughout although Cesaro was a little bit of an afterthought during the match.

Main Event: Acceptable action in the main event. Nothing ground breaking but it was good action. Cena may have looked awkward with his facial expressions on the apron but at least he kind of made it seem like he wanted in. Reigns getting the win in the end was a nice touch. But if anyone actually thought HHH was changing his mind on the main event needed to get their head examined.


Opening Segment: The opening missed for me. I mean, I don’t think anyone really believed that HHH was going to take Cena out of the main event in the first place. Then, HHH decides to make a six man tag to see who has what it takes to face Lesnar? Why not just make three singles matches to help stretch out the show? Instead everyone was thrown in the main event and it hurt the rest of the show (more on that later). Plus the zingers and one liners from HHH and Jericho weren’t that good.

Big Show/Mark Henry vs Erik Rowan/Luke Harper: When these two teams first fought a couple weeks ago I thought they had a nice little match. Now? It just isn’t fun to watch. The WWE has just run this match into the ground the last couple weeks to the point where nothing that these two teams do interest me. And this match was pretty slow. And the Wyatts continue to lose any momentum they once had.

Bellas Segment: The WWE must have known that last week’s segment bombed hard. Because they tried taking the three best women they have on the roster and adding them to the story. And it didn’t get off to a great start. Honestly, I would be much more interested in a Steph/AJ story at this point. And I like Paige, but AJ/Steph is what interests me more. But they couldn’t do anything to save this Bella story.

Lack of Character Depth: When you have all of your major players involved in the final segment of the show, it means you have a lot of time to fill. And what tonight showed is that the WWE has done a TERRIBLE job of investing in their lower card characters and making people care about them. Why should we care about Titus O’Neil vs Adam Rose. The WWE has given us no reason to care. If the WWE gave these guys some character and reason for us to get invested in them, maybe these matches would have more crowd involvement. But the WWE always fails big time in that department.

Another poor episode of RAW. The WWE seemed to want to get through this week and just get to next week where they stacked RAW (Orton/Reigns, Y2J/Bray in a Cage). But with all of the big guns in the main event it definitely hurt the rest of the show. Once again, RAW gets a 2.

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka×250.jpg×250.jpg

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WWE Notes: WWE Raw Segment Next Week, Smackdown Main Event Announced Tue, 26 Aug 2014 16:13:38 +0000 This week’s Friday Night Smackdown will feature a tag match pitting Big Show & Mark Henry against the Wyatts – Luke Harper & Erick Rowan. Also on that taping will be RVD vs Seth Rollins, in what will be RVD’s final appearance with WWE for a while.

Next week’s Monday Night Raw will feature a Highlight Reel segment where Chris Jericho will interview Randy Orton, who has not appeared on WWE TV WWE Monday Night Raw since his lost to Roman Reigns at Summerslam.

WWE heavily promoted new items for the WWE Network on Raw. They promoted 100 hours of WCW Monday Nitro added to the Network, as well as new episodes of Monday Night War.

Interestingly, WWE showed a promo for “Jeff Hardy: My Life, My Rules” to premiere at 8pm Wednesday on the network. It is not new content, as it is the documentary portion of the 2009 Hardy DVD release. However, it is a bit notable because the Hardys are in TNA, although Jeff is a prime candidate to return to WWE should TNA not make it in 2015.×250.jpg×120.jpg

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My Thoughts: WWE RAW 8.25.14 (Seth Rollins, Roman Reigns, John Cena, Bray Wyatt) Tue, 26 Aug 2014 03:05:57 +0000 WWE Raw Header - 2014

1~ I really don’t have much to say about the opening segment. Yes, there were a few Legends in the ring but the end result was another “rah-rah” John Cena promo. You would think that there’d be a huge return and promo after the absolute destruction Cena suffered at SummerSlam. Guess not.

2~ Guess it’s a good sign that Cesaro is actually getting a championship program, even if it is for the title everyone forgets is still in existence. I just hope Cesaro and Sheamus can have a few stiff and entertaining matches.

3~ I don’t think anyone in WWE history could ever out-crazy again. And I think that Paige is the next victim of the wackjob.

4~ Roman Reigns versus Seth Rollins is perfectly timed. Reigns is at that time where you want to pull back his push just a tad bit so he doesn’t become oversaturated. And Seth Rollins needs another natural opponent that will distract him from cashing in the Money In The Bank briefcase. One or two pay-per-views would do these two good, especially is Rollins gets a win over Reigns at one point.

5~ A heel Goldust & Stardust could be interesting for a little while. At least until the next PPV and God knows the Usos needed a legitimate heel tag team to feud with.

6~ It’s scary how much better Brock Lesnar is in a pre-taped promo instead of a giving him a live mic. I don’t know if he needs numerous takes or gets coaching before every answer but whatever it is, it definitely works.

7~ WOW, I can honestly say I didn’t think Nikki had that heel character in her. While Brie’s faking crying was a little much but Nikki’s words (“I wish you had died in the womb!”) were harsh and deeply personal so I hope they knew what each other would say before they went out there. If this feud is going to continue with this type of an emotion, it might be a decent dog days of summer storyline.

8~ I loved seeing a different type of dominant John Cena but did have to be against Bray Wyatt? It could have easily have been against Luke Harper, Kane, Randy Orton or Seth Rollins where they wouldn’t have been hurt by looking weak. By sticking Wyatt in there, the mystique and unpredictably of his character were basically thrown out the window when all you have to do is hit him with some big moves & suddenly he can’t compete anymore.×120-2013.jpg×250-raw-2013.jpg

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WWE Monday Night RAW LIVE Results For 8/25/14: Legends Discuss Cena vs Lesnar Mon, 25 Aug 2014 23:31:26 +0000 Tonight’s RAW brings us a Hall of Fame Panel (Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels), discuss Brock Lesnar vs John Cena and the upcoming rematch at Night of Champions. We will also get John Cena vs Bray Wyatt. And will we find out what happened to Dean Ambrose? Follow along to find out.

New Announce Team? Probably Better Than The Current Three

RAW started with the Hall of Fame Panel of Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels. HBK said Cena’s chances of winning aren’t good to beat Lesnar again because it ain’t happening. HBK said he thinks Cena is at a crossroads in his career and it may be his time. Hogan said Cena can still go. Ric Flair said that he knows all three of them think the world of John Cena and that he is the Franchise. But he’s not feeling Cena over Lesnar at Night of Champions. Hogan said he is rooting for Cena. Michaels said no one takes a beating like Cena and comes back like that. They all started arguing before John Cena came out.

Cena said everyone is weighing in on him after SummerSlam. Cena said everyone at that table has influenced him. Cena said he can’t dance around what happened at SummerSlam: It was an ass whooping. But he said even after that he wants to fight Brock Lesnar again. He looked at HBK and said that he was going to bring the fight to Brock Lesnar at Night of Champions. He said he is going to NOC to beat Brock Lesnar’s ass.

We Needed This Ref In Apollo vs Drago

Jack Swagger vs Rusev. Swagger landed an elbow sending Rusev to the outside. Back in the ring Swagger applied a quick Patriot Lock but Rusev got to the ropes. Rusev regrouped but Swagger took him down again in the ring. Rusev went back to the outside but Swagger followed him and slammed Rusev into the apron. Back in the ring Swagger hit a splash in the corner and continued to dominate. Rusev eventually dropped Swagger on the ropes then hit a splash onto his back into commercial.

Back from break Rusev hit a spinning heel kick on Swagger. Rusev took his time so Swagger recovered and hit a belly-to-belly. He started a comeback and went for a Swagger Bomb but Rusev got his leg up. Swagger grabbed it and applied the Patriot Lock. Rusev eventually made his way to the ropes. Rusev rolled to the outside and slammed Swagger into the apron. Rusev went for the Accolade again but Swagger went back to the Patriot Lock. Rusev got to the ropes again. Rusev then started working over the ribs of Swagger again. Rusev landed multiple kicks and punches to the ribs. Rusev continued to do it until the ref stopped the match because Swagger couldn’t defend himself anymore.

WINNER via Ref Stoppage: Rusev

Backstage Bo Dallas told Swagger that if he wants to recover, all he has to do is BO-lieve.

Cesaro’s Music Went From Bad To Worse

Cesaro vs Rob Van Dam. Winner is the #1 Contender for the United States Championship. Cesaro landed an uppercut but turned his attention to Sheamus at the announce table. This allowed RVD to hit a heel kick and Rolling Thunder for two. Cesaro regained control with an uppercut then hit a back stomp on the apron. Cesaro tossed RVD into the corner but RVD hit an elbow then split-leg moonsault. RVD hit a springboard thrust kick and went to the top but Cesaro rolled out of the ring. RVD went to grab him but Cesaro dropped him on the ropes. Cesaro then hit the Neutralizer for the win.

WINNER: Cesaro

After the match Cesaro grabbed the Title then threw it back into the face of Sheamus.

What Were You Expecting? Perverts

Natalya vs Paige. Nattie went for a quick rollup but only got two. Paige then landed a stiff looking right hand and went to an abdominal stretch. Nattie eventually reversed it but Paige escaped. Nattie landed a right hand then a German suplex and applied a sharpshooter but Paige got to the ropes. Both women tried applying their own submissions, but Paige eventually applied the Paige Turner for the win.


AJ came out and skipped around the ring. Paige went back into the ring and Natalya hit the Hart Punch. AJ called Paige her little English Muffin and said that she knew Paige was sincere when she said she was her friend and that she loved her. But AJ said she wasn’t as sincere as she was. AJ hugged Paige then kissed her hand and skipped around her.

And Roman Reigns Finally Remembers He Was Once In The Shield

Kane came out for the Dean Ambrose Eulogy. He said today is not about mourning, it is about the future. And that future is Seth Rollins. Seth said he was the leader of the most dominant group in WWE history, The Shield. He said he hand-picked Dean Ambrose because he was a courageous fighter. But last week he had to prove that the Authority always wins. They replayed what happened last week as Seth laughed. Seth said he wondered what was going through Dean’s mind at the moment of impact. He wonders if Dean knew that he had been out classed. He said those cinderblocks weren’t out there by accident. He said Dean Ambrose’s career can now be said in two simple words: What If? What If Dean Ambrose realized Rollins Superiority and had just walked away and known his place. Rollins said it is likely that you will never see Dean Ambrose again. Rollins said he is the one that created The Shield and the one that destroyed it.

Roman Reigns came out. Kane met him at the barricade but Reigns tossed Kane into the steps. Reigns got into the ring and went after Rollins. Reigns hit him with the podium but Kane pulled Rollins out before he could do anymore damage.


It’s the Usos vs Goldust and Stardust for the Tag Titles. The Usos took control early on Stardust. Stardust regained the upper hand and worked on the arm of Jimmy. Stardust slid under Jimmy and did a bow, then tossed Jimmy to the outside. Both Dust brothers took out the Usos on the outside into commercial.

Back from break one Uso hit an enziguri kick and the Usos started a comeback. One Usos hit a Samoan Drop then a dive to the outside, but Jey sold an injury to his knee. Jey couldn’t make it back into the ring and the Usos were counted out.

WINNERS via Countout: Stardust and Goldust

After the match Goldust demanded a rematch but instead both Dust brothers attacked The Usos. It ended with them slamming the injured knee of Jey into the ringpost.

Backstage Kane said himself and Seth Rollins would fight Roman Reigns tonight.

A Brock Lesnar video package aired.

Dolph Ziggler was out for a match but Miz came out first. Miz said that he had a stunt double for this match, and out came Damien Mizdow. Ziggler hit a quick dropkick and got a two. Mizdow recovered and landed some shots in the corner. Mizdow hit a dropkick to the knee of Ziggler and applied a Figure Four. Ziggler reversed it but Mizdow grabbed the ropes. Ziggler ducked a clothesline and hit the ZigZag for the win.

Where’s The Principal From Billy Madison When You Need Him?

Bella possible reconciliation. Brie said she was sorry. Nikki said it was the biggest load of crap that she has ever heard. Nikki said that she knows the real Brie and that she has always wanted the spotlight. Nikki said Brie has always been holding her back. She said she is done with everything that Brie is involved in which includes saving the world and her husband. Nikki said Brie always stole her boyfriends and blamed her when they got in trouble. Nikki said Brie abandoned her when she quit. Nikki said Brie is a terrible sister and even a worse human being. Nikki ripped on Brie for crying and told Jerry Lawler to get out. Nikki said she wished she had no sister and wish she died in the womb. Nikki attacked Brie to end the segment.

Seriously. How Does Someone Not See The Cinderblocks Being Put There?

Kane and Seth Rollins vs Roman Reigns. Reigns disposed of Kane early and went after Rollins but Kane recovered. Rollins came in and landed some kicks then a couple of running elbows into the  corner. Kane tossed Rollins into the corner but Reigns tossed Rollins over the ropes then hit a clothesline on Kane. Reigns then knocked Rollins into the barricade and hit a backdrop on the apron. Reigns hit his apron dropkick on Kane. He went for the Superman Punch but Kane blocked it. Kane went for a chokeslam but Reigns escaped and hit a Spear. Rollins broke up the count with the MITB briefcase.

WINNER via DQ: Roman Reigns

Kane and Rollins attacked Reigns after the match and threw him into the barricade. They revealed more cinderblocks but Reigns escaped and started fighting back. Reigns tossed Kane into the ringpost. Reigns went to throw a cinderblock at Rollins but he ducked. Reigns then hit a Superman Punch on Kane.

Los Matadores defeated Heath Slater and Titus O’Neil.

Bo Dallas defeated Kofi Kingston despite botching the Bo-Dog. After the match Jack Swagger took out Bo Dallas.

Somewhere Teddy Long Is Smiling

John Cena vs Bray Wyatt. Cena went to land some early shots then hit a hard clothesline. Cena told Bray to stay down but he got up and Cena hit a German suplex. Cena then hit another one. Cena hit another suplex and followed it with a knee to the face. Cena hit another German suplex. Cena went for another one but Bray escaped and hit a splash in the corner. Cena came back with a double leg takedown and the Wyatts interfered and attacked. Big Show and Mark Henry came in for the save into break.

Back from break the match became a six man tag. Big Show landed a chest slap on Rowan. Henry came in but Rowan hit a clothesline. The Wyatts all took turns beating down Henry. Rowan hit a bodyslam on Mark Henry. Harper hit a splash in the corner but ate a boot going for a second one. Big Show got the tag but Harper hit a dropkick and Rowan hit a boot to the face. Now the Wyatts took their turns working over Big Show. Show eventually hit a chokeslam on Bray and made the tag to Cena. Cena cleared the ring and made Harper tap to the STF. He hit the AA on Rowan. Show and Henry took Bray back to the ring and Cena hit the AA on him, then one on Luke Harper.

WINNERS: John Cena, Big Show, Mark Henry


Rusev vs Jack Swagger: I’ve used the phrase before and I’ll use it again: this was perfectly acceptable wrestling. Good match between these two. I think Rusev will end up getting higher on the card then most think. He’s improving every week in the ring and the heat hasn’t gone away yet.

Dean Ambrose Eulogy: I thought this was a nice little promo from Seth Rollins. Rollins has improved his mic work since leaving The Shield and has really grown into his role as a heel. If you saw The Shield documentary on the Network you know that there is a lot of realism to Rollins talking about being the best. And it was nice to see Roman Reigns finally remember he was once in The Shield.


Hall of Fame Panel: That just seemed like a giant waste of time. Nothing was accomplished at all during the segment. They flew those three in just for that? It was a half ass attempt to cover for the fact that Brock Lesnar wasn’t there and it did a bad job of doing it.

The Bellas Reconciliation: Once again, I don’t care how many “edgy” comments Nikki tried to make during that segment. It just does nothing at all for me. Nothing about a Bella feud interests anyone. The acting is still bad and they’ve done nothing to hook anyone into the story that wasn’t invested from the start, for whatever reason that was.

Goldust/Stardust Heel Turn: Normally I’m always in the camp of “lets here the explanation before we hate something.” But I didn’t get this turn. There was just nothing leading up to it and I fear that we won’t even get a good explanation for it. It just came out of nowhere. There wasn’t even a tease alluding to it at all. Just random.

Main Event: Look, I totally get that they are going to “build Cena back up” over the next few weeks. I understand it. It’s part of the story. But that main event was just all kinds of bad. Making it a tag did nothing. And in the end Cena really took out the whole Wyatt Family by himself, and that group was already starting to lose steam as it was.

This whole show seemed like a lot of filler. It almost felt like a glorified house show, so you kind of felt bad for the fans in attendance. Nothing of importance really happened on the show and it might have been the worst RAW of the year. I’m giving it a 2, and even that might be generous.

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka×250.jpg×250.jpg

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Classy Ring Attire 134 – BROCK SMASH!! Sun, 24 Aug 2014 15:57:44 +0000 SummerSlam was the event that we’ve been waiting for since Mania. Steph returns to the ring. Dean and Seth have a great match. And that Brock Smash match. This is how you crown a champion.×250.jpg×250.jpg×120.jpg×120.jpg

]]> 3 Bella Twins,Brock Lesnar,dean ambrose,Dolph Ziggler,john cena,randy orton,Raw,Roman Reigns,seth rollins,Summerslam,WWE SummerSlam was the event that we've been waiting for since Mania. Steph returns to the ring. Dean and Seth have a great match. And that Brock Smash match. This is how you crown a champion.  SummerSlam was the event that we've been waiting for since Mania. Steph returns to the ring. Dean and Seth have a great match. And that Brock Smash match. This is how you crown a champion.  Inside Pulse Wrestling no 59:43
Spain’s WWE SmackDown Report and Results for August 22nd 2014: (Insert Lemongrab Scream, For No Real Reason) Sat, 23 Aug 2014 17:30:03 +0000 Hey there, lads and lasses. Your beleaguered SmackDown reviewer is here, exhausted after a frickin’ hilarious afternoon/evening/night (it really depended on the time zone) with Jonah Kue and BD, recording the latest in that excellent audio series: Trashy Ring Attire. Pray download it once available, and listen to us muse eloquently about SummerSlam and whether or not Stephanie McMahon is sexy.

With that being said, it’s a new dawn and we have a feral, drooling manbeast as our champion (with the skinniest, whitest, girliest calves I have ever seen). Oh, and by the way, allow me to feel savagely pleased at the fact that now RAW will rarely see its world champion either. You hear that, Czerwonka and Harrak? We’re all in the same boat now!

So, yeah, let’s get to the show.

We start off with the Viper, and even though he lost at SummerSlam, at least he didn’t end up looking like a character from a Lars Von Trier movie (do not watch Lars Von Trier movies). We see Michael Cole sitting by himself and I’m about to commit seppuku when he reveals that JBL is still there and so is some chap called ‘Tom Philips’. Well, unless he’s a cleverly disguised Jerry Lawler, he’s got to be better at commentary than Jerry Lawler, but I still demand to know why Renee Young’s probably-shapely hindquarters aren’t gracing that seat. Still, let’s see what ‘Tom’ can do and, more importantly, what nickname I can come up with for him.

Three seconds in, ‘Tom’ is a better commentator than Mike Adamle and Jerry Lawler combined. Orton says that one match does not define him, although it does define every other match he’s had. Orton says he’s never been called a loser, so clearly he’s never been on…the internet. He shows us his assault on Reigns from last month, and says that’s what happens when he’s focused, which makes you wonder why Randy is so unfocused 99% of the time. Orton has a match with Rob Van Dam; talk about unfocused. He says he will simply take our respect from us, which sounds like a vague rape threat.

I Learned That Rollins Is Latin American Last Night, Which Means That This Makes Sense

Rollins’ music plays, and he comes out with his bullshit bullion briefcase and his Batman-themed BDSM suit. He shakes hands with a retreating Orton, because he probably didn’t want to get respect-mugged. ‘Tom’ sure seems to be on top of things so far. Michael says that John Cena has demanded a rematch with Brock Lesnar at Night of Champions, which is like a crippled Bruce Wayne wheeling himself up to Bane and saying ‘bet you can’t do that again, fucker’. Having said that, I look forward to the spectacle of Brock ripping off Cena’s head and quoting Hamlet. Or any Shakespeare, actually.

Rollins will be facing Jack Swagger and, honestly, fuck Jack Swagger. Fuck his xenophobia, fuck his escort of soldiers who couldn’t do a rifle drill if their nation depended upon them and fuck anyone who expects me to view him as a face. We get a look back at Rollins injuring Ambrose, and God I hope we’re in for some historical recreation tonight. Apparently Ambrose escaped medical personnel and is currently ‘at large’, which is the greatest reason for an absence since people were getting dragged into parking lots by the Wyatts.

Here’s Swagger, and JBL despises him almost as much as I do. Bell rings and Seth gets taken over twice by Simple Jack. Seems like Rollins asked for the match and told Swagger ‘you failed your country’. Good for you, Seth. Rollins gets backed into the corner, but hits a shot to the ribs, hitting a front dropkick. Knees get dropped to the ribs, and Seth wraps his legs around Swagger’s midsection. Jack backs Seth into the turnbuckles to break the hold, but Rollins takes him right back down, hitting a forearm, but gets caught coming off the second rope and belly-to-belly slammed. Swagger tries to lunge at Seth, but gets caught on the apron with a kick as we got to break.

We come back to the action as Seth has his legs once again wrapped around Jack’s midsection, but Swagger gains a reprieve via a German Suplex to Rollins. Seth misses a stinger splash, getting tossed and knocked around the ring by Jack. Swagger Bomb connects, causing Jack grief to the ribs. ‘Tom’’s whole role appears to be actually calling the action: God, that’s new. Seth hits a kick to the ribs, gets tossed onto the apron and hits a kick to the head. Seth comes off the top rope, but lands right into the Patriot Lock. He rolls out, misses the Curb Stomp and Jack drives both men out to the floor. Seth comes back into the ring, tries a baseball slide but gets caught in the Patriot Lock on the outside. Swagger tries to clothesline Rollins, but runs into the steel post and get caught on the outside. Ref’s counting, and Jack hustles back into the ring…and immediately gets Curb Stomped. He falls to the outside and gets counted out.

Well, I can totally get behind Swagger getting hurt. And the match itself was okay too. 2.5 Stars.

Hah, here comes Bo Dallas, playing the part of salt in Swagger’s wounds. Oh, and careful, ‘Tom’; you stay out of the morality conversation, now. Bo calls Jack Swagger ‘an American zero’, and damn it, he’s right. He calls himself America’s new sweetheart, and tells us to Bolieve. I love the fact that ‘Bolieve’ is now a word in my Microsoft Word Dictionary.

We look back at the Bellas apparently having their first fight ever and Nikki’s just godawful acting. She’s so wooden, the only role she could play is a mahogany desk I’ll tell ya what! Can’t blame Nikki for being in a bad place, really; her boyfriend did get completely emasculated on Sunday.

Here’s Miz backstage with Kane, and they just force the skinny pumpkin spice latte jokes, don’t they? This is weird, because Kane has more right to be called a movie star than the guy who’s doing the movie star gimmick, mainly because his movie wasn’t called See No Evil 4. Miz is in a match with Reigns, and is Kane’s alignment ‘be a dick to the closest person to me’ at the minute? Not that I mind; I’d just like to know.

Still Less Of A Squash Than Lesnar vs. Cena.

Here’s Lana and Rusev, and Rusev is facing Sin Cara. Rusev beats the unholy fuck out of Sin Cara, so they can bring out the latest black guy that Rusev’s feuding with. I actually wrote that sentence out during Rusev’s entrance, and that exact thing ended up happening. Sin Cara did have some good-looking movement in the ring.

2 Stars (I’m a sucker for a squash).

Post-match, Henry did come out and Rusev ran off. Henry yells ‘I don’t speak Russian!’, like a lack of linguistic knowledge is a point of pride.

Renee Young, looking incredible this week, is backstage with Rob Van Dam. She asks how he feels about Orton; Rob says Randy needs to chill out. Oh boy, Rob’s going to try and deal to Orton in the ring, isn’t he? Orton attacks Van Dam out of nowhere, prompting Renee to shoot a ‘fuck’s sake’ look at the camera. Randy tells her to tell Rob he’ll be waiting for him in the ring.

Renee Should Have Come Out To Fight For Rob

Orton’s in the ring, awaiting Rob Van Dam, who sprints out at him. Wow, he actually is almost displaying emotion. Orton is chased out, but comes back in the ring, taking Van Dam down in the corner and stomping him. Van Dam dodges a charge and rocks Orton with a collection of kicks. This is the first time I’ve ever seen Rob fired up, seriously. He somersaults over the top rope, taking Orton down on the outside, and then drops him on the barricade and tries to hit his spin kick, but Randy dodges. One guy in the crowd yells ‘what did you think was going to happen?!’ Fair play, man. Orton flings Rob into the barricades and slams him off the announce tables and throws him into the steps. Bell rings for a DQ as Orton back suplexes Van Dam onto the table.

Meh, 2 Stars for the violence and for Van Dam not acting stoically stoned in terms of emotion.

Vintage DDT onto the outside, and Orton is handily beating the shit out of RVD here. Back in the ring, Randy grabs a chair and RKOs Rob onto it. Orton then tells the announce team to tell Roman he’ll see him out here later. Why does Randy assume that everyone can be bothered to deliver his messages?

Renee Young’s backstage, and here’s Roman Reigns. She asks him about Orton’s threat, and Roman acts pissed about what the Authority did to Ambrose, despite the fact he did jack and shit to stop them. Sounds like some motherfuckers are going to get their drinks poisoned.

You Know, Paige, They’ll Probably Make AJ Give You The Belt Back Anyway

Natalya’s in the ring, and God, the German announce team are terrifyingly enthusiastic. Must be Nattie’s blonde hair setting them off. But here comes Paige, fresh from her softcore lesbian advert for the WWE Network this Sunday. I can’t get over the fact that it looks like Paige is wrestling in her underwear, and I worry that someone’s going to walk in when I’m reviewing these matches.

Paige immediately socks Natalya in the face, stomping her in corner to follow it up. Nat slaps her in the face and hits some punches in return. Double-underhook suplex to Paige, followed up by a baseball slide. Paige is thrown into the ring, but ducks back out and kicks Nat in the chin when she follows. Natalya gets pulled into the steel ring post shoulder-first. Headbutts to Nat, and she hits a clubbing blow to the spine before hitting knees to Natalya on the apron. Paige vines her legs around Nat’s midsection, but then AJ’s music hits. Nat breaks the hold, but nearly gets pinned off a press from Paige. AJ runs off with the belt as Paige drops Nattie with a hard knee to the face. Paige pursues AJ, who gives the belt back, and Paige sprints back into the ring to break the count, immediately getting caught in a sharpshooter by Natalya, and she taps as AJ watches.

Okay, you all probably know by now I hate when wrestlers see someone walking off with their belt and don’t think ‘well, I figure management won’t let them leave the arena with it. And hey, I’m still the champion, right?’ But this was actually more entertaining than usual; maybe because AJ gave it right back. Plus, this seems to tease at Natalya making this a triple-threat, and that sounds pretty good to me. 2.5 Stars.

Cody Creeps Me Out More Than The Wyatts

The Dust Brothers show up, followed by the Wyatts. It seems like the Dusts might be getting a title shot, considering their win on Monday over the Usos, and that the Wyatts are somewhat preoccupied by Big Show and Mark Henry. Stardust is starting off against Harper, and away we go. Punches to Harper, then Stardust rolls out of a back suplex but gets worked over in the corner. He jumps over Harper in the corner and hits a shot to the side of the head, taking control. Harper takes it back with an elbow, tagging in Rowan. Rowan catches Stardust, but Goldust had the blind tag and takes it to Erick with some fists, but Rowan just straight overpowers him and beats him down.

JBL and Michael bully ‘Tom’, which from what I hear from shoot interviews means that JBL kind of likes him. I assume Michael’s just found some reason that ‘Tom’ is morally comparable to a Nazi paedophile. Rowan is still in control, until a Rhodes Uppercut takes him out, but even then Rowan just straight up Cor Vons (obscure reference) him into a commercial.

Back from the break, Harper’s in control of Goldust, tagging in Rowan, who hits a bodyslam and big leg drop. Goldust is kept down as Rowan works him over. Tag to Harper, who slams fists into Goldust in the corner. Gator Roll inflicts yet more punishment, but Goldust hits a boot, then the hurricanrana…and gets hit with a superkick and a Batista Bomb. Stardust breaks up the pin, and then low-bridges Rowan. Harper knocks Stardust off the apron; Goldust rolls Harper up and that’s three.

Decent match. I’m not sure how well the Dusts and the Usos will play off each other, although a Brothers vs. Brothers match is reason enough for it to happen. 2.5 Stars.

The Wyatts get pissy after the match, destroying the Dusts for daring to hand them another loss. Harper throws Cole’s chair at Stardust, because fuck your need to sit down, Michael. Clothesline and a splash does for Goldust. ‘Tom’ snarkily offers Michael his chair afterwards, which I appreciate. I’m surprised the German announce team didn’t claim the chair as lebensraum.

Breaking news from Triple H, that news being ‘we don’t have anyone we can seriously put in a match with Brock Lesnar other than John Cena’. We’re all aware that Triple H just condoned Cena’s televised euthanasia, right? We recap Lesnar’s belt presentation ceremony, and I have to feel bad for the guy; he destroys Cena handily and they give him a belt with the Network logo on it? He should have ripped Hunter’s face off and stitched it over that symbol. Cena will apparently be on RAW next week to address matters, and I hope beyond hope that he cries at some point during that.

Guess Which Wrestler Recently Held The Intercontinental Title

Main event time, and here comes Roman Reigns. With about six minutes left on the clock, I have an idea where this is going. I have no idea what that thing Miz is wearing is, but I’m sure it is not a real article of clothing. We see a replay of Roman punching Miz’s cheekbone into fragments and dust, which I think was the production team’s way of going ‘remember this, Miz? You big bitch.’ Orton immediately comes out, aware that Miz is not going to be a threat to Roman on his own.

Miz tries to jump Reigns, who beats him down until Miz runs off, but Roman cuts him off on the outside and clotheslines him. Back in the ring, Miz actually gets in some shots, but then immediately gets Samoan dropped. Orton tries to slither into the ring, but Reigns backs him down. Miz hits a big boot, throwing some hands to a prone Roman. He goes for the Skull-Crushing Finale, but eats a spear and gets pinned.

Not that much of anything there. 2 Stars.

Roman wants himself some of Orton, and Randy seems set to accommodate him, actually getting in the ring. Wait, are we sure that’s Orton? When did he grow a spine? The guys tee off, throwing hands before Reigns gets clotheslined outside the ring. Roman manages to smash him off the steps; Reigns gets hurled into the barricade but comes back to uppercut Orton. Randy grabs a chair and hammers Roman with it, throwing him back in the ring. RKO on the chair is attempted, but Reigns counters and gives Orton a taste of his own chair-medicine. Superman Punch effectively brings the argument to a close, with Roman Reigns standing tall.

Kind of a weird SmackDown: felt like a strange comedown from SummerSlam. Enjoyable, but just a little off in places. Maybe I’m not drunk enough; it’s conceivable. Seven.

David Spain’s WWE Sex Move of the Week: The ‘Bo Dallas’. After dissatisfactory intercourse with your partner, perform a victory lap around the bed.

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Classy Ring Attire 133- What Time is it? SummerSlam! Fri, 22 Aug 2014 00:53:24 +0000 This is an episode of a podcast about professional wrestling with a title that is a reference to a song from High School Musical 2. Thats a reference that, like .02% of our audience is going to get. Anyway, we break down the SummerSlam card and say goodbye to Del Rio and the scratch logo.×250.jpg×120.jpg

]]> 0 alberto del rio,Bella Twins,Brock Lesnar,dean ambrose,Dolph Ziggler,john cena,randy orton,Raw,Roman Reigns,seth rollins,Summerslam,The Miz This is an episode of a podcast about professional wrestling with a title that is a reference to a song from High School Musical 2. Thats a reference that, like .02% of our audience is going to get. Anyway, This is an episode of a podcast about professional wrestling with a title that is a reference to a song from High School Musical 2. Thats a reference that, like .02% of our audience is going to get. Anyway, we break down the SummerSlam card and say goodbye to Del Rio and the scratch logo. Inside Pulse Wrestling no 1:32:16
THE RAGER! 50 Classy and Trashy Thoughts: Summerslam 2014 Wed, 20 Aug 2014 15:00:21 +0000 Welcome, friends.
It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything and I feel like I start most of my columns this way now. However, you couldn’t possibly expect me stay away after this year’s Summerslam, right? And I brought some friends with me. That’s right, all the hosts of Classy and Trashy Ring Attires have made the long trip and even BD’s offspring came along. Yes, PUSSBOT, the WWE-programmed talking Roomba has been let out of it’s cage just so that it can share it’s Summerslam thoughts. Don’t blame me for letting it out of the cage, blame BD and that drunken Canadian night he had with the business end of a vacuum hose (if anything, I hope this article creates and perpetuates a new stereotype that Canadians all do the nasty with vacuums).
Anyway, the rules of this were each person/bot came up with their 10 thoughts independently of each other and weren’t allowed to to see the thoughts of others until the posting of this article.

Buckle up, friends, it’s gonna be a long one.

Kue’s Thoughts…or Kue’s Rekall, if you will (bring it back, already!)
1. I’m glad I’m being rewarded for my getting the Network for $9.99 by an opening promo of Hogan telling me about how I should be getting the Network for $9.99. Thank you for that kick in the balls, Hogan.

2. Given it wasn’t a bad match, I’m not sure what there is to gain from Ziggler winning a second tier title over the Miz, who is portraying a new character. Isn’t that the opposite of pushing a new concept? Either way, not horrible for a space filler.

3. And here is the Divas title match that everyone and their mother will claim is saving the Divas division, though, in truth, is oozing in mediocrity.

4. The only thing memorable about this flag match is the fact that, during the match, X-Pac tweeted “Sell the ankle more Rusev”. A mid-carder from the Attitude Era coaching via Twitter is almost as hilarious as a Jack Swagger face push. And they managed to cram all of it into this match.

5. Ambrose and Rollins was, of course, entertaining as hell. The lumberjacks took away from this match more than it seemed to add. But honestly, I’m not complaining. I’m happy with these two in the ring regardless of the stipulation, but…

6. …the match of the night definitely belongs to Bray and Jericho. From beginning to end, this match had the crowd invested. Dramatic, psychological, and technical enough without losing any flare. And that Sister Abigail on the barricade looks sick. I’m almost inclined to say Wyatt should be the one to get the ‘Mania 31 WWEWHC title win over Lesnar. We’ll see if that opinion changes down the road.

7. And here is the Divas match that actually is the more entertaining. Steph obviously has been prepping for this match. And to be honest, I think I’ve enjoyed this more than any other Divas match this year so far.

8. Reigns/Orton was less boring than I anticipated it to be. I still don’t think the crowd is as behind Reigns as they are Ambrose or Wyatt. Hopefully, they can put him in a more interesting feud after this. God knows he needs one.

9. I rarely say this, but I don’t think Cena/Lesnar could have gone any more perfectly than it did. It was exactly what it needed to be. And you can bet whoever goes over Lesnar will be getting the biggest goddamn pop of the year.

10. Overall, a very solid PPV. But Brock, I barely saw blood, and no urine or vomit either. Vince, I want my $9.99 back. Take it out of Del Rio’s salary.

BD’s Thoughts…I’m sure he’ll use your comments for a new column sometime soon.
01) Anyone else catch the sponsor? We are truly living in the golden age of RIDICULOUSLY specific potato chips. I saw Cinnamon Bun flavoured Lay’s the other day. I have a theory that the guy at Lay’s who runs R & D is an alcoholic that’s just drunk all day long and everyone’s afraid to say something about it. After all, he can quit anytime he wants! Now here, try these – Diet Caffeine-Free Cool Ranch Dorito-flavoured hickory-smoked EXTREME Mountain Dew: Code Deep Cyan.

02) Right. The actual PPV. So, what is it that people were impressed with on this Stephanie / Bella thing exactly? Was it the horrible acting, that both only have jobs due to who they’re related to, that they’re both horrible in the ring, or was it that it ended on a “swerve” is going to result in an even worse feud and storyline where they only way you’ll be able to tell the girls apart is their tit size? Because I saw a headline that said “Stephanie McMahon steals the show”. Well, I watched this whole thing against my better judgement, so how the fuck did that happen, exactly?
Go ahead. I’ll wait.

03) Exactly. It didn’t. Are standards so low now that people will forgive a horrible storyline, nepotism, bad acting and a terrible match just to see Stephanie McMahon beat up? No offence to Steph, because she does do a very good job of being hated, and is very good at receiving Joan Rivers-levels of plastic surgery and looking like she wants to physically bore a hole through the audience with her eyes. But that doesn’t mean I need half an hour from her on a PPV. Guys. Seriously. Please. This was a bad match and feud that ended with one twin turning on the other. We are literally about to have an “evil twin” storyline. Drill me a new ass channel before I’m going to watch the Bellas fight each other.

04) Randy / Roman was better than I thought it’d be. Orton gets my blood pressure to where it’d be if I played Deer Hunter, but Roman is cool. I just didn’t have high hopes for this, but my pessimism was misplaced. Didn’t set the world on fire or anything, but was decent enough for sure.

05) I’ve said it a few times in comments and on the podcast, but Jack Swagger? Fucking really, people? How does this anti-American gimmick keep catching on in the US? It’s like every time we see a spider, we gotta tent the whole house. I’d actually kind of rather the fake Russian dude be able to speak freely than have the Tea Party dude succeed in getting him deported for it. Actually, I don’t give a fuck if this fake Russian dude has a bomb IN the arena. I’ll take my chances with the blast before I watch a Jack Swagger singles run. I bought milk before his last singles run that was still good by the time he flopped. It’s true. I’ll show you the carton. Oh yeah – the match – it was shit.

06) So like… I get that you wanted Cesaro to win. I did too. I get that you want Cesaro higher up the card. I do too. But at least it was a decent match he had with RVD, and why all the hubris over RVD winning? RVD is about 50% as good as he once was, which still makes him 900% better than The Miz.

07) Speaking of… did not see the Ziggler win coming, which was nice. I still think it’s kinda weird to be THIS excited about the dude winning the IC belt from a guy like The Miz given where Zig was a year ago, but still cool. If this whole Miz thing was designed to give Ziggler a rightful yet unexpected win, then fair enough – this is about as useful as he’ll ever be. If he’s going to get the belt back or ascend to fighting with Ambrose or something, let me know and I’ll have someone give him cat AIDS.

08) Ambrose / Rollins was an incredibly good match… especially given the lumberjack stip. Was not expecting that. I suppose if anyone could have pulled it off, it was these two. Just tremendous. Both guys are just doing awesome work right now. I do hope we get a couple straight one-on-one’s out of them before either go anywhere else, but at the very least let’s not waste Ambrose just because he lost. The crowd reaction he got for just springing back and hitting Rollins with a clothesline alone is bigger than most guys get anytime in their career… like, for example, a lot of guys and girls featured on this same card. Go ahead, try to guess which ones!

09) Only one person commented that Shaemus missed this PPV. This means my experiment to replace him with a bag of Folgers Crystals yielded almost the exact results I thought it would.

10) At least Ebola is making a comeback and not Cody Rhodes. He didn’t get on the PPV either.

P.U.S.S.BOT aka BD’s abomination of both man and machine
1. What the heck, Chris? No Sheamus? Remember the good ole days of SummerSlam when Sheamus fought Mark Henry in that five-star classic? And now we can’t even get the BROGUE on the show?! What is that, Chris? I’ll tell you what it is. It’s a travesty. A Irish-hating travesty. BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE

2. The main event was on first! The MIZZZZZ! He’s back and more vicious than ever! Did you see that Skull Crushing Finale?! I don’t know how Dolph kicked out. Must be all of those steroids. Then he scammed The Awesome One out of the Intercontinental Championship. Although it was the best match of the night by far. Mainly due to a severe lack of Sheamus. BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE

3. Why does anyone care about this Bray Wyatt guy? He’s just a knock-off Undertaker that DOESN’T have an undefeated WrestleMania streak thanks to my boi John Cena! He fought Johnny boy and couldn’t beat him. Then he fought the dinosaur Jericho and couldn’t beat him. Why should we care that he beat Jericho at SummerSlam when he lost to him last month? Although we should have more fireside chats with Bray except next time with someone more talented than Jericho. Like Sheamus! BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE!

4. Although I would’ve like to have seen a normal flag match, this match was alright. I just wish Jack Swagger would’ve won this one. Everyone remember when Jack Swagger ran around with an Eagle Mascot? That was awesome! He needs to bring it back! Although I think Ireland should’ve been represented in this match so Sheamus could’ve kicked Rusev and his ugly manager in the FACE. I actually was made in Ireland. I bet you didn’t know that! BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE!

5. Remember when the Divas Division was relevant? I miss those days. We used to have Kelly Kelly, Jillian Hall, and Candice Michelle!!! Do you remember those days, Joel? But now we have an English blinding-me-with-her-skin diva and Miss Skips a lot. Actually they’re both skipping now. Ew. Give me a Kelly Kelly/Mickie James classic any day over this garbage. The only thing that could’ve made this match better would’ve been to have Sheamus be the referee. BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE!

6. I love lumberjack matches because we get to see all of the talented wrestlers that are not given time on air like Fandango and Rybaxel. However, this one we had Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins attacking the lumberjacks. Evidently, they don’t know how this match works! In Shield matches, the wrestlers jump the lumberjacks! Still why wasn’t Sheamus a lumberjack?! He would’ve been there to make them act accordingly with just one kick! BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE!

7. Then we had another great match! Roman Reigns. Randy Orton. It should’ve been the main event! IT WAS EPIC! The way Orton caught Reigns’ spear! The big superplex! The RKO that Reigns kicked out of! Who does that?! Then wham! A Spear to end Randy! What a great match-up and there’s only thing that would’ve made it better. But I’m sure you know what that is by now… Mark Henry! ‘Somebody’s gonna get their ass kicked.’

8. I think Roman Reigns needs just another number to talk about how awesome he is. He’s easily the biggest breakout superstar since my boy Bad News Barrett. Hopefully we will come back soon. Maybe we can have an Elimination Chamber match at Elimination Chamber involving Roman Reigns, Jack Swagger, The Miz, BAWD NEWS BARRETT, Sheamus, and John Cena! Have Mark Henry be the special guest referee! Then have Sheamus win so he can defend the WWE World Heavyweight Championship at WrestleMania! BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE

9. The main event was a great match-up with Brock Lesnar unleashing a wide arsenal of moves including F-5s, German Suplexes, and… and…. punches! Plus how can you forget that way in which Brock sat up like Undertaker and mocked him! Screw the deadman! He’s older than dirt. No one wants to see him anymore thanks to Brock Lesnar. I applaud you sir. But you’re no Sheamus. BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE

10. Altogether it was a meh PPV as any PPV without Sheamus is at most meh. Who knows, maybe we’ll get a team involving Sheamus, The Miz, Bad News Barrett, and Jack Swagger. Call them the Bad News Crew. That’d be AWESOME! Now back to your regularly scheduled programming with Mr. Sanders and Mr. Leonard! Well after your daily dosage of… BROGUE BROGUE BROGUE!

Joel’s Thoughts: that’s right, folks, he still exists in written form
1. In my usual desperate attempt to view everything as the start of an amazing Dolph Ziggler push, I have chosen to view the outcome of his match as thus: Because Brock Lesnar is now champion, but won’t be competing on the same schedule that previous champion Cena was competing on, this hopefully means that the IC title will now be the most commonly viewed title on Raw. And that will happen during the time that it is around the waist of Ziggler. So basically, Ziggler is holding the biggest title on Raw now, right?

2. I’ve been waiting for the inevitable Bella v. Bella storyline since that time where they were competing over what may or may not have been Daniel Bryan’s virginity. (Anybody remember that thing where Gail Kim won the feud?) But now seems like an odd time to implement that. It’s not like the Brie vs. Steph feud has gotten stale yet, and this whole Daniel Bryan infidelity thing just added more to that for Brie to deal with. This was the best time to do a Bella twin fight?

3. Are Kane and Goldust going to fight? Kane and Goldust should fight.

4. Damien Sandow was not a part of any feud, was in no match, and didn’t even have a usual promo bit, but that did not stop the costume thing from happening. I’m still undecided on this whole gimmick so you can feel free to persuade me in whichever direction you prefer, but now matter how you feel, I think we should all be impressed that even just to stand beside the ring in a lumberjack match, Sandow was dressed as an actual lumberjack.

5. Jericho lost cleanly putting over the younger talent. That whole “Jericho winning a match” thing that happened last month was confusing. This is more of what we expect out of Jericho.

6. Lets talk for a minute about replays. At the end of the Miz and Ziggler match, Miz sold that finisher pretty well, especially for Miz. I wanted to see that happen again, and look they showed me a replay of the most devastating move of the match. What missed from the live feed during that time was Ziggler cheering. That was a good use of replay. In the middle of the Brock and Cena match another replay was used. Only this time they missed Brock’s nod to the Undertaker as he sat up. This was a bad use of replays. I know that there is a risk of missing something cool while showing a replay, but you guys, the sport is scripted. Brock offered a subtle nod to his Taker match (and subtly is a rare commodity with Brock) and we all missed it because WWE had to go all replay happy.

7. Every title that was being defended at the event changed hands. When’s the last time that’s happened?

8. So we know that John Cena is going to have his rematch at Night of Champions. And Cena might even win the titles back that night because we can’t have Brock as champion working the schedule that he works. But there is something unique about that upcoming match, thanks to this one. Because of SummerSlam, John Cena actually feels like the underdog rather than the commentators just telling me that he’s the underdog. I can’t even remember the last time that Cena as referred to as the underdog where my eyes didn’t instantly roll.

9. And just to add to that, starting the match out with an F5 was a perfect bit. For the rest of the match, when Cena was too slow, too worn out, couldn’t get on the offensive, it could all be traced back to the fact that he had to kick out of a finisher from the very start.

10. I need to freak out for one quick second here because this was the Brock that I wanted to see. Not the “I have to fight Triple H three times” Brock Lesnar. Not the “I’m breaking everybody’s arm” Brock Lesnar. Not even the “Streak Breaking” Brock Lesnar. No, when it was first announced that Lesnar would be returning to WWE my first thought was about how I could not wait to watch what I remembered to be an unstoppable beast completely and utterly destroy John Cena. And that is what I got to see at SummerSlam. Good job. I give it 9.99/10.

Sanders’ Thoughts
1. It always feels weird for me to actually like a match Miz was involved in because I’ve been conditioned to just naturally hate any match Miz is involved in. But I enjoyed this match a lot and it was partially because of Miz so I will give him his credit. However, Dolph Ziggler, you guys. I mean, c’mon.

2. The Paige and AJ match was a lot better than last month’s match and was a lot closer to what we anticipated when this feud started. I know everyone has been harping on the Charlotte/Natalya match from Takeover but thing that I’ve noticed myself after watching it is that I now expect a lot more out of Divas matches and I think that’s a justifiable position to take. It’s the new standard for WWE Divas matches and sure, a lot of Divas don’t have the talent or experience to pull off a match like that but it should be what they’re striving for. And a big problem with a lot of this is that I think some of these Divas, AJ and Paige included, can absolutely pull of a high caliber match like that if they were just given the time. Had this happened before Takeover, I’d say this Paige and AJ match was the best Divas match in recent memory.

3. Okay, that wasn’t a Flag Match as it was billed, that was a “National Pride Match.” Also, Rusev is doing Swagger a great service by selling that hard for him because nobody actually takes Swagger and his Swaggie Time Ankle Lock seriously. Kicking Zeb at the flag was being put in place was a great heel move too. Seriously, this is Swagger’s one chance to get over and then, who knows, he’ll be around for decades to come as the new Hacksaw.

4. I never thought I’d see the day in which I actually enjoy a Lumberjack match. First of all, you had Sandow dressed as an actual lumberjack so what more do you need? And yeah, there was your typical lumberjack chaos but it was set up by Rollins and Ambrose to actually make sense. Just a super fun match that almost had me clamoring for a Goldust/Kane feud for like half a second.

5. This whole Mama’s Boy nonsense is basically a super silly Tough Enough with just one twig and 100% less Stone Cold. Now if Mama’s Boy had Stone Cold verbally rip him a new one at the end of all these videos, counts me up. However, until that happens, 0/10 would not recommend.

6. Bray vs Jericho really made me feel like they were holding back at Battleground and why wouldn’t you? It’s Battleground and WWE has our $9.99 already. But I liked this match a lot more and reminded me why I like watching Bray in the ring. And Jericho is Jericho, he’ll find a way to deliver regardless of if he has or hasn’t lost a step.

7. And let me just throw this out there, for some reason I was listening to Chris Jericho’s podcast last Friday. And no this doesn’t have anything to do with Summerslam but it’s my article and you all can politely go suck it. But firstly, just because you’re a well spoken former or part-time wrestler doesn’t necessarily mean that you should have a podcast. Don’t get me wrong, being a podcaster myself, I’m a little bit biased when it comes to the wrestling podcast scene being this insanely flooded right now so let’s just get that out of the way. I don’t even know why I was listening to Talk is Jericho because the opening 15-20 minutes is plugging ads, shameless plugging of Fozzy and him going into an absurdly long acapella version of whatever song he could think of that has a cowbell in it (sure it was a funny bit the first 5 times but it’s getting to be a bit much and we’re just ready for the meat of the show). But after all that, Jericho took calls from fans which always drives me insane because they tend to sound like they’re using rotary phones and then ask idiotic questions. And just then, Jericho gets a call from Bray Wyatt in character and then the two take this opportunity to cut promos on each other. It’s odd because Jericho is rarely in character on the show and wrestler guests are never in character when they come on. So we have this awkward serious scripted bit in the middle of “the pod of thunder and rock and roll” and then it just awkwardly ends and Jericho is riding the struggle bus all the way to an ad read. See, Colt Cabana really got it right in Art of Wrestling, he takes care of all the plugs and ad reads at the top of the show, gets them out of the way and doesn’t awkwardly edits another ad read in the middle of the interview. In the wrestling podcast world, Colt is god and flawless while Steve Austin is alright in most occasions and Jericho is just bad on most occasions. I haven’t heard JR’s podcast but I’ve read nothing but terrible reviews of it. And I know this can be seen as me just looking down my nose at these far more popular podcasts and poke holes all over the place but I really needed to get all that out. How many of you have I lost?

8. Honestly, with the way Stephanie looked in the ring, had someone said they were gonna do a finish in which Stephanie pinned Brie clean, I would’ve completely believed it and almost would’ve preferred that to the parade of shenanigans that we got. Seriously, it wasn’t 5 stars or a completely polished match but it was miles and miles beyond what I was expecting out of Steph going in. And the Nikki swerve was predicted by many a few weeks ago and felt pretty inevitable so we might as well get it over with. The Bellas’ acting is like you took two cardboard cutouts of “generic soap opera stars A and B,” tape mics to them and put them in the ring for 20 minutes. We really can just sweep this whole story under the rug and make Night of Champions be a triple threat between AJ, Paige and Stephanie.

9. Roman and Randy was fine. It was slow and felt way too long but that’s just about any Randy Orton match the last few years. It’s just hard to care about a match when it’s obvious that Randy doesn’t seem to care himself. But then the last few minutes were pretty damn entertaining and I really dug the RKO Randy caught Roman with. It’s just really interesting how a year ago, I slipped and called Roman “the closest thing Shield has to a weak link” and was rightfully shat on by just about every commenter for it and now it seems like most people are giving him the Cena treatment and just hating the guy. I would like some sort of explanation, please, because I still enjoy the hell out of him as a singles competitor and could watch the guy all day in the ring. Has he limited his move set to his best hits lately? Possibly but still, that spear is still impressive. But now the internet dislikes the guy now that he’s climbing the ranks when I thought this was something we all agreed to be okay with this. Is it like a hipster thing? Is he too mainstream for us to like now? Discuss!

10. Brock vs Cena was exactly what it needed to be. Just about as close to a squash match as possible. Personally, I would’ve liked to have seen Cena get pinned about 5-10 minutes into the match just to really shock everyone. However, Cena doing his never giving up thing makes sense but so does Brock constantly swatting him back down time after time. They made the defeater of the streak look insurmountable and now I’m starting to come around to the thought that maybe Brock really was the right person to break the streak. How they decide to work around Brock’s limited schedule, I have no idea but maybe this is the time where we relax on the whole “the title must be defended every 30 days” thing and make the main story focus on wrestlers trying to deem themselves worthy to face Brock for the championship at Survivor Series or Rumble. Whatever they decide to do, I don’t think Brock is gonna be cashed-in on at all. I don’t even think they’ll tease it.

Thanks to all these wonderful gents/bot for collaborating with me on this. Remember you can find both Trashy Ring Attire and Classy Ring Attire on iTunes for the incredibly low cost of $9.9…free, I meant free. I’m sorry.
And all of us have twitter accounts you should follow but the two I’m actually requiring you all to go and follow is @CRAttire and @TRAttire. Do it and all your dreams will come true…if all your dreams are snide but short posts about WWE. So follow us and then go find a life coach to get better dreams.

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do twice,

The Answer: I’ve come to the conclusion that Iphone autocorrect is a passive aggressive asshole. I type in something but it’s spelled wrong but instead of changing to the right spelling, it leaves it as is with the red squiggly line. So I delete and try again, typing the word correctly but iPhone is like “he’s a dumbass and clearly this is how dumbasses spell that word.” So it autocorrects the correct spelling for the screwed up spelling that I had before…but with the red squiggly line to make sure I knew that it’s wrong and I was an idiot that one time I didn’t know how to spell “guarantee.”×120.jpg×250.jpg

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WWE Monday Night RAW LIVE Results For 8/18/14: The Beast Is Champ Mon, 18 Aug 2014 23:26:12 +0000 It’s RAW the night after the biggest fight of the summer. Brock Lesnar is Champ, and he destroyed John Cena in the process. What’s next for the new WWE Champ. Also, we will get the answer to why Nikki Bella turned on her sister Brie. Follow along for all of the results!

Acting Talent! (Missing In This Segment)

Daniel Bryan’s music hit to start the show, but Stephanie McMahon came out instead. She did the yes chant all the way down. She thanked the audience for chanting her name all the way to the ring. She said people are saying SummerSlam was even better than Wrestlemania. One reason is because they crowned a new WWE Champion, and tonight the Authority will present him a new title belt. She wished John Cena a speedy recovery. Steph said Brie Bella is the biggest loser of the night and that she learned to never mess with The Authority. She thanked Triple H for always being faithful and her rock by her side. Unlike Daniel Bryan, who cheated on his wife. She introduced Nikki to tell us more about her sister.

Nikki came to the ring and lost a shoe in the process. Nikki said she’s always loved Brie. But Brie became way too selfish and manipulative. And everytime Brie got in trouble she always blamed Nikki. And she was always competing with her. Nikki said Brie beat her to the alter, but Brie actually lost because she married that scrawny goatface. Nikki said she’s heartbroken over this situation. But now she stands tall on her own two feet. Nikki said she is glad to finally be free.

Brie came out and said she doesn’t know what happened last night but is willing to forgive Nikki. Nikki slapped Brie and said that she will never forgive Brie. Brie ran off crying.

Random Tag Team Pairing #27652

Erik Rowan and Luke Harper vs Big Show and mark henry. Henry landed some early punches in the corner then knocked Rowan down with a clothesline. Harper tagged in but he ate a boot from Henry. Big Show tagged in and he slapped the chest of Harper. Big Show hit a bodyslam followed by a headbutt. Big Show hit some punches in the corner but Harper reversed him and landed some elbows. But Big Show fought back and tossed Harper over the top into commercial.

Back from break Big Show elbowed Harper. Show knocked Rowan off the apron but Harper hit a dropkick sending Show to the outside. Rowan then hit a boot to the face on Show on the outside. The Wyatts took turns working over Big Show. Harper connected on a superkick then did the gator roll. Show got out of a headlock with a backdrop. But Rowan tagged in and prevented a tag. Rowan hit a bodyslam on Big Show for two. He went for another one but Big Show blocked it and hit a DDT. Mark Henry got the tag and went to work. But Harper took out Big Show on the outside. Henry went for the World’s Strongest Slam but Harper hit a boot to the back of Rowan, but Rowan only got a two count. They went for the double chokeslam on Henry, but Show made the save. He hit the Knockout Punch on Harper, then one on Rowan and Henry hit the World’s Strongest Slam for the win.

WINNERS: Big Show and Mark Henry

Renee Young interviewed Seth Rollins. He said it feels so good to prove that he is the future WWE Champion, but he is also the future of the WWE. Suddenly a bucket of ice water was dumped on Rollins. The camera then panned to Ambrose. He said, “What? Its for charity!” Ambrose then attacked Rollins until officials broke it up.

Seth Rollins came into HHH’s office demanding a rematch with Dean Ambrose. HHH agreed and said he was letting the WWE Universe pick the match, so Ambrose’s blood will then be on their hands.

Paige vs Natalya. Paige dedicated the match to AJ. Both women fought for control early before Paige kicked Natalya on the back of the head. Paige then slammed Natalya’s head into the mat a few times. AJ’s music hit and she skipped around the ring. The distraction allowed Natalya to roll up Paige and pick up the win. AJ saracastically said she respects Paige and has to get into the ring and shake her hand right now. Paige bailed when she did.

Eat. Sleep. Suplex. Repeat.

Triple H and Stephanie McMahon came out. Triple H once again talked about SummerSlam being great. He introduced the new WWE Title then welcomed Brock Lesnar. Lesnar and Paul Heyman came out and they posed for a photo. Paul Heyman said last night at SummerSlam, his client conquered the Title holder. That means he is the advocate for the new WWE Heavyweight Champion of the World Brock Lesnar. Heyman said he has a secret to reveal, and that is that John Cena isn’t there this evening. He said Cena isn’t there because he can’t physically appear because of his client. Heyman talked about Rock and Austin’s runs at the top being short, but Cena lasted ten years. Heyman said that as he witnessed the suffering on John Cena’s face, and he gets why people adore him. His kids adore him and he hates it. Heyman said he gets why John Cena never gives up, and if he had the time of day he would make Cena a Paul Heyman guy. Unfortunately Paul Heyman doesn’t share these opinions. He said in Lesnar’s Universe Cena left a martyr. In Lesnar’s World, those who die with the most street cred still die at the hands of Brock Lesnar. Heyman said that anyone who steps into the ring with him is just a man. Lesnar is a beast and will lay waste to anyone who steps into the ring with him. Heyman said last night was basic Brockonomics: Eat. Sleep. Suplex. Repeat. He did it 16 times. Heyman ended with Eat. Sleep. Conquer. John Cena.

Would Still Like To Know What Miz Is Wearing

Dolph Ziggler vs Miz in an IC Title rematch. Both men exchanged offense early on. But Dolph landed awkwardly on his left knee, which he tweaked last night. Miz started working over the left knee and rammed it into the post going to commercial. Back from break Ziggler went for a couple of quick pinfalls then hit a DDT for two. Miz blocked a kick and applied the Figure Four. Dolph eventually got to the rope. Miz then knocked Ziggler down on the apron. Ziggler fell to the outside and ended up getting counted out.

After the match, Miz rammed Ziggler into the apron. Back in the ring, Ziggler blocked a kick then hit the ZigZag on Miz.

WINNER via Countout: The Miz

Losing Streaks From Wrestler A, Now To Wrestler B

Swagger said after last night he is going to come back up swinging, because that is what America allows you to do. And that is what “We the People” means. Back from break it was Swagger vs Cesaro. Cesaro took control early on but Swagger escaped a gut wrench. Swagger started a comeback and hit a Swagger Bomb for two. The move hurt Swagger’s ribs though and allowed Cesaro to regain the upper hand. Cesaro hit some knees then dropped him on the ropes and apron. Cesaro went to knock Swagger off the apron but Swagger blocked it and applied the Patriot Lock. He applied it in the ring but Cesaro got to the ropes. Cesaro then kicked the ribs of Swagger and hit the Neutralizer for the win.

WINNER: Cesaro

Bo Dallas came out. He said Swagger lost his dignity last night and let down America. But he can get all of that back, if he BO-lieves.

Chris Jericho said he has the best fans in the WWE. And they will have his back no matter what he does. And that is something no one can ever take away from him.

Ryback Chants? Must Mean It’s His Hometown

Six Man Tag: Randy Orton and Rybaxel vs Roman Reigns, Sheamus and Rob Van Dam. Sheamus and Axel started. Sheamus hit a clothesline but Axel hit a toe drag sending Sheamus to the ropes and tagged in Orton. Orton went for a backbreaker but Sheamus countered and hit a rolling senton and RVD hit Rolling Thunder into commercial. Back from break Sheamus landed his rope punches on Axel and Ryback. Axel sent Sheamus into the ropes but Orton pulled the ropes down on him. Orton backdropped Sheamus onto the barricade.

The hometown crowd chanted for Ryback so he tagged in and hit some shots to the gut. Ryback hit a clothesline in the corner followed by a suplex. Orton came in but Sheamus hit White Noise. This allowed Roman Reigns to get the hot tag. Reigns hit the apron dropkick followed by the Superman Punch. Orton came from behind and hit a backbreaker. RVD tagged himself in and hit a crossbody on Axel followed by a split leg moonsault. Ryback broke up the pin. Sheamus hit a Brogue Kick but Orton hit the RKO. RVD hit an enziguri kick on Orton and Reigns followed with a Spear. Axel tossed Reigns into the post but RVD came back with a spinning heel kick and finished it off with the Five Star Frog Splash for the win.

WINNERS: Roman Reigns, Rob Van Dam and Sheamus

Randy Orton told Ric Flair to stay out of his way or he would find out why he’s the Legend Killer.

Bray Wyatt said he is the new Face of Salvation.

The Usos vs Goldust and Stardust. Jey hit a couple of armdrags on Goldust. Jimmy came in and continued to work on the arm of Goldust. Goldust tagged in Stardust but The Usos quickly had him cornered. The Usos continued to dominate the match. Stardust then countered one of the Usos with a roll up for the win.

Now If Only Mark Went All Sexual Chocolate On Lana

Rusev and Lana came out to talk about their win last night. Mark Henry interrupted. Henry talked about representing the Olympics being his proudest moment. And he has no problem with any country representing themselves, except how those two jackasses do it. Henry said seeing the Russian flag raised last night made him sick to his stomach. Henry said the power of America isn’t gone, and these people don’t believe that either. Henry told Rusev to listen up boy, and that he would give him a personal tour into the Hall of Pain. The two started to brawl until Henry hit Rusev’s injured ankle, and Henry hit the World’s Strongest Slam and then a splash on Rusev.

Just Let These Two Go Three Hours

Dean Ambrose vs Seth Rollins: Falls Count Anywhere. Ambrose started with a crossbody but Rollins came back with a shot to the throat. Ambrose popped up though and hit a dropkick. The fight went into the crowd. They ended up on the stage. Ambrose hit a suplex on the stage for two. They went back to the ring where Ambrose pulled out some chairs and a kendo stick. Ambrose held the chair to the back of Rollins and bodyslammed him on it. Ambrose then hit an elbow drop off the ropes with a chair and got a two count. Ambrose set the chair up in the corner, but Rollins reversed him and tossed Ambrose into the chair.

Rollins worked over Ambrose with a kendo stick back from break. Ambrose tried hitting his bounce back clothesline but Rollins ducked and hit an enziguri kick. Rollins missed a splash in the corner with a chair and Ambrose came back with a tornado DDT for two. Ambrose went for Dirty Deeds but Seth kicked Ambrose and he went for the Curb Stomp, but Ambrose countered and they collided into each other. Rollins gained the upper hand with some punches but Ambrose came back with his own then catapulted Rollins into the post. Ambrose landed some kendo stick shots. Ambrose tossed about ten chairs into the ring. He went to suplex Rollins onto the chairs but Rollins blocked it, then hit a sit down powerbomb onto the chairs but only got two.

Kane then appeared at ringside as Rollins went under the ring to grab a table. Rollins wanted to hit the Curb Stomp onto Ambrose off the rope through the table, but Ambrose recovered and crotched Rollins. Ambrose then hit a suplex through the table off the second rope. Kane came onto the apron but was knocked off by Ambrose. Ambrose hit a dive onto both men. Ambrose hit Dirty Deeds on Rollins in the ring but Kane pulled the ref out. Kane attacked Ambrose but Ambrose knocked Kane into the steps then over the announce table. Ambrose tossed Rollins over the barricade then ran across both announce tables to take out Rollins. Ambrose wen to hit Dirty Deeds on the announce table but Kane stopped it and hit a chokeslam onto the table. Rollins hit the curb stomp onto the table. Kane then revealed a set of cinderblocks by the ring. Rollins hit a Curb Stomp onto Ambrose into the cinderblocks. The ref stopped the match and awarded it to Seth Rollins.

WINNER: Seth Rollins


Seth Rollins vs Dean Ambrose: Holy hell Batman. I could watch these two wrestle all day. They just have such great chemistry in the ring. Ambrose is mega over with the crowd. And as I said earlier today, there’s a chance he gets over enough to surpass Reigns in terms of popularity. Ambrose is off to film a movie soon, so this writes him off for a little bit. And it also will set up perfectly for Ambrose to return and fight Rollins inside Hell In A Cell in October. Awesome match.

Paul Heyman Promo: Like you expected this to be somewhere else? That promo effectively did two things. One, it put over Brock Lesnar as Champ. Lesnar just being able to sit there and not have to say a word while Heyman talks him up his great. Second, it actually put over John Cena too. In defeat, Heyman talked about Cena never quitting and understanding why people would admire that. Another reason why Heyman is so great.

Big Show/Mark Henry vs Erik Rowan and Luke Harper: Surprisingly decent match considering the parties involved. I’m okay with the pairing of Big Show and Mark Henry. I haven’t been interested in Big Show’s work in about five years but am willing to give him a shot in this new tag team. But the action here was okay and I didn’t find myself not liking any of it.

Mark Henry/Rusev: And then Henry had to go and do that. So he’s in a tag team and defending America? I’m okay with that. I’ve always had a soft spot for Mark Henry. I loved his run in 2011 when he won the World Title. And Henry isn’t terrible in the ring. I thought for sure Rusev’s next opponent would be Sheamus. But I’m okay with Henry. I liked his promo and hope these two can put on a decent big man match down the line.


Opening Segment: If you read my SummerSlam thoughts earlier, you know I wasn’t a big fan of the Bella break-up angle. I said they would need to do a lot to keep me interested in it. Well they failed big time this week. Nikki was just awful in every way. She couldn’t act, she did a terrible job expressing her emotions and basically everything else you could think of. The segment was doomed from the start with Nikki losing her shoe and her mic not working. Just a bad segment of an angle that should have ended at SummerSlam.

The Usos vs Goldust and Stardust: The match was just weird. First of all it was pretty short. Second of all there were about twenty different armdrags/armbars in the match. Then the match ends with a quick Stardust roll up. I get Champs lose on TV to set up Title matches, but that match just made no sense to me. Everything about it was off.

Miz vs Dolph Ziggler: Again, I have more of a problem with the setup of this match more than anything. There’s two minutes of action, then a commercial, then the match is over three minutes back from break. Why bother trying to make it a big deal if that is all the action that is going to happen?

Nothing new really happened on this show. We don’t really know what the situation is with Brock Lesnar going forward. Ambrose and Rollins put on a great match. There were a couple of other good matches on the show as well. There was also some weird matches and that terrible segment to start the show. Ambrose vs Rollins did enough to raise this ranking above average, so I’m giving RAW a 6. 

Make sure to listen to the HTCPulsecast this Thursday at 8!

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka×250.jpg×250.jpg

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JC’s Top Rope Report: My SummerSlam Thoughts & Wrestlemania 31 Predictions: Round 2 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 22:26:02 +0000 Hello everyone. I’m here to throw in my two cents on a pretty good SummerSlam and give my second round of predictions as to a potential Wrestlemania 31 card. I usually like to do three different rounds of them: Right after Wrestlemania, after SummerSlam, then at the end of the year.

-I’m officially just lost for words on what the hell is going on with Cesaro. Him and RVD had a good pre-show match. But RVD is finishing up his current run and they still have Cesaro lose to him? I know the WWE tends to do the whole “book you like crap before a push” routine, but this is just reaching new absurd levels with Cesaro. They would have to pull off a booking miracle to regain any of Cesaro’s heat.

-The first three matches on the actual show would be described as a term someone I know likes to use, P.A.W.: Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling. Miz losing the Intercontinental Title was surprising to me, as was Paige winning the Divas Title. Ziggler winning was a surprise because the WWE seemed to be pushing Miz as one of the top mid-card acts. Unless they want Ziggler holding the IC Title when Wade Barrett returns, it was surprising to me. Paige winning kind of came as a shock to me too. With AJ losing again, it for some reason leads me to believe she may be finishing up her WWE run too. Just a wild hunch I have. Maybe they do “Title vs Career” Match at Night of Champions. And to me that was Rusev’s best performance to date. The crowd was into the match, which was important for a mid-card match like this. The next logical step for Rusev would probably be the United States Title. As for Swagger? I’d honestly keep him off TV for a bit and have him come back to challenge Rusev for the US Title in a month or two.

-If there is a wrestling god out there, Dean Ambrose vs Seth Rollins will end inside Hell In A Cell. It’s just so logical at this point that it makes too much sense. These took a shitty Lumberjack gimmick and made it quite enjoyable to watch. Ambrose losing here really did no damage to him. Assuming Ambrose gets a win back at Night of Champions, the logical blowoff happens inside the Cell. And you give these two 30 minutes inside that Cell, you’re probably looking at the match of the year.

-Chris Jericho and Bray Wyatt were put in a tough spot. They followed the match of the night that had the crowd up on their feet and into the whole match. So it took the crowd about half the match to get fully invested. Much better than their Battleground match. Part of the problem also is that the same portion of the crowd that likes Bray Wyatt also likes Chris Jericho. And that resulted in the pretty evenly split Jericho/Wyatt chants. I’d actually prefer this to be the end of this feud, and see both men move on to someone else.

-Stephanie McMahon and Brie Bella put on a much better match than anyone expected. The Nikki Bella heel turn was way too obvious. I was kind of disappointed to not see Daniel Bryan there. Or at least say something about his physical therapist’s accusations being false. I don’t think Nikki can give a reasonable explanation that would make me care about the next chapter of this story. I cared up to SummerSlam because I expected this story to end there. Now? They have some work to do.

-After a second viewing of the Roman Reigns/Randy Orton match, I’m still not ready to christen Reigns as the next big face of the company. Can he get there? Absolutely. But there is still some work to be done if you want Reigns taking the Title from Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania. If that match happened at Night of Champions, I feel pretty confident saying Lesnar would get cheered over Reigns.

I would also argue that Dean Ambrose is more over than Reigns at this point. And if that continues, the WWE could face the same problem they had this year with Daniel Bryan. Oh, and there’s a possibility Daniel Bryan could be back for Wrestlemania. And at this point, Bryan/Lesnar for the Title seems like a much better selling point and draw than Reigns/Lesnar. I’ve gotten crap from people who feel like I nitpick at Reigns flaws like his promo delivery and material, but if he is going to succeed he needs to work on everything to make his character great. If it was me, I would book him like Goldberg. Make him dominant in the ring and keep his material short and to the point on the mic.

I also have to give props to Randy Orton for working his ass off to make Reigns look good as well. Reigns wasn’t slacking by any means, but Orton did well to make him look better. Similar to Bray/Jericho, it took the crowd a little bit to get into the match because of the previous one.

-The main event, if you ask me, couldn’t have been booked better. For the first time in years, we finally have a no non-sense, dominant heel Champion. And when someone takes the Title off of him, it’ll be a big moment. Booking Brock Lesnar to completely destroy Cena was something I never thought the WWE would do. But kudos to them for doing it and making an indestructible monster in the process.

What’s next for Lesnar? If it was me I wouldn’t go right to Cena/Lesnar again. Especially not in a one-on-one match. If that is going to happen, you have to add some kind of stipulation to the match. I honestly wouldn’t be opposed to a one off Lesnar match at Night of Champions against either Chris Jericho or Batista. Jericho would make sense because it would be an easy way to write him off as he leaves for his next sabbatical. If you want to get real nuts, you could have Lesnar send out an open challenge and have Dean Ambrose answer it. It would fit his “lunatic fringe” character about not caring what he does. But that’s a longshot.

Regardless, I’m keeping the WWE Title on Lesnar until Wrestlemania. I don’t want Lesnar facing The Rock. They could have EASILY done that match at Wrestlemania 29 but didn’t. And if he isn’t around full time I’m okay with that. This is different than the Daniel Bryan situation. Bryan was injured and couldn’t defend the Title. Lesnar can be built up as a man who does whatever he damn well pleases and essentially holds the Title hostage. I’ve been on the Lesnar for Champ bandwagon since he’s been back. Now that I got my wish, I hope everything plays out well.

So, with my SummerSlam review out of the way, what do I now see happening at Wrestlemania 31?

WWE Championship: Brock Lesnar (c) vs Roman Reigns

-As I talked about above, I’m still not all the way on the Reigns Train. And I would say there is a 50/50 shot that this match changes when I do this again in the fall. I can understand why the WWE wants Reigns to be their next face of the company. But he needs to improve a bit more in the next few months for me to completely by into the hype. But as of today Roman Reigns is not 100% ready to main event Wrestlemania.

Triple H vs Dean Ambrose

-I find it very hard to believe that Ambrose is going to lose any of his momentum going into Wrestlemania. If he was a heel, I would have had him lined up to face The Rock. But the crowd, in my opinion, is going to prevent Ambrose from becoming a heel anytime soon. Ambrose is going to continue to play the lunatic fringe, anti-authority figure well. Which means it seems almost logical for him to fight HHH at Wrestlemania.

Daniel Bryan vs Seth Rollins

-I was in a tough spot with Daniel Bryan. Like I’ve said numerous times already, I gave serious thought to putting him in the Title match against Brock Lesnar. But I stuck with Reigns and am giving him a few more months to show me he can elevate his game. I wasn’t going to put Bryan against Triple H again. I gave some thought to a match against The Rock, but that wouldn’t work for me. Assuming Rock is going into the Hall of Fame next year, they aren’t turning him heel in a program against Bryan and risk getting booed at the Hall of Fame. So I put Rollins against Bryan here. It elevates Rollins for one. And I would assume the story would be that Bryan has to go through everyone in The Authority to get a Title shot. And Rollins might be the last one in this scenario.

The Rock vs Batista

-Hollywood vs Hollywood. I think Batista’s second return is going to go better than his first one. First of all, he won’t be shoved down our throats like he was the last time. Second, I think the positive press he’s gotten with Guardians of the Galaxy will help him out. I thought about putting Bray Wyatt against The Rock but I have something else in mind for him. And Bray/Rock would be too similar to Cena/Bray from this year.

The Undertaker, Sting and Kane vs The Wyatt Family

-I’m making this a tag match for a few reasons. One, I don’t think The Undertaker can wrestle even a 15 minute singles match on his own again. Second, I think Sting will wrestle a couple more matches before Wrestlemania. So not having a singles match at Wrestlemania isn’t a big deal. I’d like to see Sting vs Undertaker, but the spectacle alone won’t be good enough. This match allows Sting and Kane to do most of the work, and Taker can come in and hit his signature spots. I’d be inclined to put The Wyatts over here.

John Cena vs Bad News Barrett

-I thought about putting Rusev here. But I think Barrett might have been in line for a push had he not been injured. Cena should be in a position from here on out when he is used to help elevate/push someone into the main event scene. Barrett and Cena worked well together the last time they feuded, and Barrett’s seasoning that he now has should help a program here.

Randy Orton vs Cesaro

-First time I did this I had Cesaro facing Brock Lesnar. Now? I’m just hoping he is relevant enough to get a singles match at Wrestlemania. Orton is really the only opponent left. I had for him. As much as I thought Orton did well in his match against Reigns, I could easily see him getting lost in the shuffle come Wrestlemania time.

Andre the Giant Battle Royal

-I’m assuming this becomes an annual tradition.

So what are your thoughts on all of this. Agree? Disagree? Well you can call into the HTCPulsecast this Thursday night at 8. Here’s the link:

We’re 90% sure we are doing a show this week. And we are 75% sure that we will have former WWE creative team member Andrew Goldstein on as well. So it is sure to be a good show!

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka

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My Thoughts: WWE SummerSlam 2014 (John Cena vs Brock Lesnar, Randy Orton vs Roman Reigns, Stephanie McMahon vs Brie Bella) Mon, 18 Aug 2014 02:58:39 +0000 SummerSlam 2014 Background Header


1~ Rob Van Dam beats Cesaro cleanly with the 5 Star Frog Splash. Read that sentence again and tell me what’s wrong with it.

2~ My Xbox 360 feed was constantly buffering or entirely exiting out of the show. Couldn’t “Retry” to entire the feed as it would just exit out again. Now I’m in the office watching SummerSlam on my computer just waiting for this to crash too.

3~ And now I’ve missed two matches and two title changes. To say I’m pissed would be an understatement.

4~ Decent “big man” match between Swagger and Rusev. But where do these guys go from here…?

5~ And now the matchup is 1 to 1 and I’m even more intrigued to see the final chapter of the Jericho/Wyatt story & feel much more justified that Jericho winning their first in the feud was absolutely the best idea.

6~ Very good match between Stephanie and Brie Bella. It was as if Stephanie had been at least working a part-time schedule and not completely retired for over 10 years. They were able to get the emotional storyline across, including Nikki’s turn, and were also given a small preview of the eventual Triple H/Daniel Bryan match.

7~ A slower match than I expected but a fantastic showcase of what Randy Orton is still capable of given the right opponent and that Roman Reigns is able to be a major singles star. From the incredible superplex, that awesome powerslam off of the spear attempt, kicking out of RKO which rarely happens if your name isn’t John Cena and finally the wicked spear. I love the fact that Reigns’ spear is more about height & contact and not aiming for the abdomen. It makes the move look so much more devastating.

8~ WOW, that was a great brawl and a FANTASTIC false finish to kick off the main event. Brock Lesnar is like a real life video game troll. He’s just going to German Suplex Cena until Cena’s health is low enough to pin him. One of the greatest beatings we’ve seen in WWE this year and in the end they created an unbeatable heel WWE World Heavyweight Champion in Brock Lesnar. And now we know it takes 16 German Suplexes to beat John Cena. Remember that with WWE 2K15 is released.×120-2013.jpg

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Rasslin’ Roundtable – WWE SummerSlam 2014 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 05:51:01 +0000 Welcome to the Rasslin’ Roundtable!

Rasslin’ Roundtable

WWE SummerSlam 2014


WWE SummerSlam Pre-Show Match

Intercontinental Championship

The Miz (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler


David Spain: I want Ziggler to have the belt. Fool that I am, I refuse to believe that it is too late for Dolph to rise, and damn it: this is a great chance. But I think we’re going to see a bit longer of a chase before he does it, and that spells a Miz win for now.

Winner: Miz

Justin C: I hate that Miz is doing Tyler Breeze’s gimmick. I would like to see Breeze up on the main roster some time soon, but it is unlikely with them having similar gimmicks. As for the match, the only way you could get people to care about Miz is in a match with Dolph Ziggler. The shine on Miz has been gone for three years. There’s really no reason for Ziggler to win the IC Title again. Miz retains.

Winner: Miz

Chris Sanders: Call it grasping at straws but I’ve got my fingers crossed for a Ziggler resurgence. Sure it’s just a mid-card belt but considering where he was at a few months ago, it’s progress. Punk is gone, Bryan left, toss the internet a bone.

Winner: Dolph Ziggler

Rhett Davis: The Miz has a new gimmick that’s not too much different from the old gimmick. He’s an arrogant jerk that has a lot of connections and money. Oh and Dolph meanwhile drowns in the midcard. Miz wins in Los Angeles.

Winner: The Miz


The Buzzards Swarm Jericho

Chris Jericho vs. Bray Wyatt


David Spain: Jericho’s win last month was a surprise, which I think made this storyline stand out. With the absence of Harper and Rowan from ringside, this is set up to be a far better win for Bray than last month’s would have been. Looking forward to this one.

Winner: Bray Wyatt

Justin C: I’ve been really disappointed in the build to this match. Part of it is because the build seems like the same thing we saw in John Cena vs Bray Wyatt. Bray Wyatt’s character has lost some steam in the past few weeks. I still like it and have hope for him in the future, but Bray seems to be stuck in a rut. As for Chris Jericho, it seems like just another one of his usual returns. I like both guys more than this preview would sound like, but something just isn’t clicking with this program for me. But I think Bray gets his win back here and we get the rubber match at Night of Champions.

Winner: Bray Wyatt

Chris Sanders: It’s Bray’s 1 year anniversary since his first match on the main roster, he lost last month. I think we all know how this will turn out. The Wyatt boys are banned from ringside which is causing a lot of people to assume we will see the debut of a new member of the family interrupt the match. A lot of names are being thrown around, most of them saying Bull Dempsey from NXT. That’s a pretty fitting choice but I will say this: Braddox is a southern gent that is looking quite scruffy these days.

Winner: Bray Wyatt

Rhett Davis: Yawn. I thought the build for this match would be awesome, but it hasn’t. It’s been extremely boring. Bray wins to set up rubber match record.

Winner: Bray Wyatt


Flag Match

Rusev vs Jack Swagger

David Spain: I think this is the best example of an idea that makes sense of paper but is going to look oddly similar to the dumbest thing you can imagine in practice. I feel like the sensible thing is for Rusev to have his dominance stopped in a real match, by a real opponent, rather than get injured by some grinning xenophobe in this turnbuckle-climbing contest.

Winner: Rusev

Justin C: This one is interesting. Technically, if Rusev loses here, they could still talk about how Rusev has never been pinned or made to submit. I mean if we are getting into technicalities, Rusev already has a loss on his record when he didn’t win the Battle Royal on RAW last month. It’s nice to see Jack Swagger get a face run. I thought he could have had a nice one if they turned him face by going after Michael Cole after Wrestelmania 27. Swagger could very much turn into a Kurt Angle-lite type of face. Part of me thinks the Patriot Vince McMahon wants to see the American Flag waving proud at the end. Now of course that could happen post-match, but I’m going with a minor upset and picking Swagger to win here.

Winner: Jack Swagger

Chris Sanders: Let’s all say hello to the one way Swagger could actually beat Rusev without actually pinning him. If that isn’t a metaphor about Iraq, I don’t know what is. Swagger might as well show up on Raw the next night with a Mission Accomplished banner. That’s still a topical reference, right?

Winner: Jack Swagger

Rhett Davis: They are obviously building Rusev to be the next foe for John Cena to squash so why would Swagger win here?

Winner: Rusev


Divas Championship

AJ Lee (c) vs Paige


David Spain: This is an odd one for me, but in a pleasant way: I think they can go either with this, give either woman the belt, and it’s a good way to go. I personally can’t predict so much as guess, but considering Paige is doing the old mindgames, let’s give her the win.

Winner: Paige

Justin C: These two have had a better month of feuding compared to Battleground. And it helps that we now have Paige firmly established in the heel role. It was tough for the crowd to decide who the face was the first time around. I feel like these two know they put on a stinker at Battleground and will look to make up for it here. The result really all depends on A. How long AJ is sticking around, and B. Who would be next up in the Divas Division? I’m sticking with AJ to win here and we end up getting one final match at Night of Champions.

Winner: AJ

Chris Sanders: Still not sure where they’re going with the frenemy thing but I’m alright with it continuing because who else is in the title hunt right now? Exactly.

Winner: AJ

Rhett Davis: I like AJ and Paige, but they need to work better than they did last month. That match just didn’t work. I think AJ wins this one though.

Winner: AJ Lee


Lumberjack Match

Seth Rollins vs Dean Ambrose

David Spain: I think that the chase for this has been going on for some time now, but this is the first real clash we’re getting. A Lumberjack match does not seem to imply feud completion, and offers a good deal of opportunities for the Authority to get their hands mixed up in things. These factors, for me, indicate a tainted win for Rollins.

Winner: Seth Rollins

Chris Sanders: Announcing this as a Lumberjack match was a bit of a “wamp wamp” moment for me because if they were worried about Seth running away, at least make it a cage match or something. I would say make it a hell in a cell but we’re only a few months away from that PPV. I’m gonna say that Seth will have shenanigans go down in his favor and it’ll lead to extending this feud even longer. As long as we get more Dean popping out of giant boxes, I’m game.

Winner: Seth Rollins

Rhett Davis: Dean Ambrose wanted to ensure no that there was no outside interference and he asks for a lumberjack? What the what? Why not take a steel cage match? Anyways, Ambrose wins this one with Seth being thrown off by Lumberjacks.

Winner: Dean Ambrose


The Roman Empire: Fall or Rise of?

Randy Orton vs Roman Reigns


David Spain: Well, it was nice to see Reigns take a beating earlier this month, and I like the build if not exactly the match itself. Orton does not tend to make for an amazing one-on-one contest, and whilst I enjoy Roman, I don’t see him making it a contest to be remembered. Still, this is about the Rise of Reigns, and so I think Roman is going to be spearing the Viper in two this Sunday.

Winner: Roman Reigns

Justin C: This is my lock of the night. Roman Reigns is going to go over Randy Orton here. Reings is being built up as the next top guy in the WWE. He’s not all there yet. And he still needs to work on his promo delivery. But he has time. What happens with Randy Orton after this will be interesting. Does he get kicked out of The Authority? Does Batista come back to feud with him? Orton is a good hand to have around. But as I said in the beginning, Reigns wins with the Spear and continues to dominate on his way to Wrestlemania 31.

Winner: Roman Reigns

Chris Sanders: Unless shenanigans, this will be another stepping stone for Reigns. The guy will have a significant WWEWHC reign within the next year.

Winner: Roman Reigns

Rhett Davis: Uhh, I don’t like Roman and Orton is stale with a boring opponent so meh. Roman wins to become the next big boring thing.

Winner: Roman Reigns

The Boss Gets Her Way

Stephanie McMahon vs Brie Bella


David Spain: I don’t see why I’m expected to care about this. I’ll admit that the build has been quite diverting, but we are all aware that we’re tuning in to watch a mother of three who can’t wrestle wrestle the wife of a man we’d far sooner see wrestle than her, right? I say Steph will probably take the win, because God forbid WWE has to end one of its two ‘women are irrational’ storylines.

Winner: Stephanie McMahon

Justin C: This program was going  relatively well, and then they completely screwed it up on RAW. Daniel Bryan cheating? Really? We didn’t need that to become a part of the story. I’m sure the WWE expected us to just not believe Steph, but it was just so unnecessary. But Stephanie McMahon just plays her heel character so well that people want to see her get her ass kicked. Some people think that Nikki will turn on Brie, but I don’t see it happening. I actually think we will end up seeing Daniel Bryan accompany Brie to the ring. And Brie wins with the Yes Lock.

Winner: Brie Bella

Chris Sanders: Things have very much shifted in Stephanie’s favor on Raw this past Monday. I really do hate the new cheating angle that’s been added but I guess it’ll give reason for Daniel Bryan to at least be on camera in the near future so there’s your silver lining. The only thing I wish they would’ve clarified on Monday was if Brie was defended that Bryan didn’t schtoop the personal trainer. I feel like that detail was lost in the shuffle here but it’s kind of an important one. Either way, everything is in Stephanie’s favor right now which usually means things will shift the other way for the ppv match itself.

Winner: Brie

Rhett Davis: This has been the most captivating Women’s storyline possibly ever. I’ve really enjoyed what I’ve seen thus far and look forward to this thing extending.

Winner: Brie Bella


WWE World Heavyweight Championship

John Cena (c) vs Brock Lesnar

David Spain: Are any of us so foolish as to doubt Lesnar now? Honestly, I wish he’d come back to fight Punk, then Taker and now this: erase the Cena and Triple H shenanigans from history and just have this build. Even with Lesnar being a part-timer, I think he’ll do it. They can’t not have him do it: not now. I believe in that screaming psychopath: God help me, I do.

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Justin C: These two put on a good brawl last time. And while the ending may have taken away from the match for a lot of people, it was still fun to watch. Paul Heyman speaking for Brock has made the build very good. And Cena has been good as well. I’m of the opinion that Brock Lesnar is winning here. And I’m perfectly okay with him taking the Title and not being around all the time. To me, the Title has been over exposed in the last few years. If Brock isn’t around all the time it will make seeing the Champ fight or on TV seem like a special occasion, If Brock doesn’t win here it will take away any meaning that his win over Undertaker at Wrestlemania had. The Streak ending will turn out to be worthless. Brock gets the win, and we get a dominant heel champ that we have been dying to see for a long time.

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Chris Sanders: It was a mistake to have Brock lose to Cena back in 2012 but it wasn’t a massive one because it’s Brock and he’s done pretty well for himself since then. All that being said, if Brock loses in his first match since breaking the streak, wrestling fans should be offended. For real, we’ve invested 2 decades in Undertaker’s streak and they finally pulled the trigger this year and I would hope WWE didn’t do that just to build towards a match at Summerslam. I’m not saying that’s what they did but it had to have been in the back of their minds, right? If you really wanted to shock the world here, have Brock convincingly beat Cena clean in 5 minutes and end the show at 10:40pm. The only people you’d piss off were those that had to spend $40 on the PPV and, let’s be honest, Vince doesn’t exactly care about the people that haven’t subscribed to the Network. And if network users get mad at that, calm down, it’s ten bucks a month, stop complaining and go watch NXT.

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Rhett Davis: Uh, Brock wins. Or they may as well cut him.

Winner: Brock Lesnar


Thanks for reading!×120.jpg×250.jpg

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WWE Monday Night RAW LIVE Results For 8/11/14: Hulk Hogan Birthday Bash Mon, 11 Aug 2014 23:32:58 +0000 It’s the final RAW before SummerSlam. Both Brock Lesnar and John Cena are in the building. Expect a confrontation there, along with a final sell for every other match on the card. There’s also a birthday celebration planned for Hulk Hogan. There will probably be a nWo reunion. But the real question is this: Will we get a Damien Hogan appearance? Follow along to find out.

Hip Hop Advocating Jew. T-Shirt That

Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar came out to start the show. He said in six days he will be the advocate for the new WWE Champion Brock Lesnar. Heyman said his client has asked him to come out tonight and sell SummerSlam to the Cenation. Heyman said bad things happen to good people when you step into the ring with Brock Lesnar. Heyman said those who don’t learn from history live to repeat it. Heyman then showed pics of Lesnar ending The Streak at Wrestlemania. He said that he told everyone it would happen and they shouldn’t have been surprised. He then brought up Lesnar destroying Rock and Hogan back in the day. Heyman told the Cenation to watch SummerSlam, because after it they won’t be able to see John Cena around here anymore. Heyman said even though Cena won their previous match, Cena lost the fight. Heyman said Brock was still battling diverticulitis at the time of that loss, but this Sunday Brock is 100%. Heyman said this Sunday will be a Shakespearean Tragedy. Heyman said they aren’t from West Newbury, and they can’t hip hop like you. Heyman said he is just Brock’s advocating Jew. Heyman said Cena says his time is now, but Brock said his calendar is out of date. Heyman went on to rhyme and rap. It was great. I couldn’t keep up writing it. Heyman said this is Brock’s house now. He said we are now all his servants. Heyman said they are leaving the house to go get dinner, but after they are coming back home.

Super Roman

Roman Reigns came to the ring. Kane came out and said he is back as The Authority’s Director of Operations. He said last week beating Kane was like beating two men. So The Authority wanted to see if he could actually do that. Reigns opponents were Rybaxel. Reigns took down Axel with a shoulder tackle. Axel yelled at Reigns and called him a coward. Reigns shoved him down. Ryabck wanted in. He landed some quick blows but Reigns came back with a clothesline out of the corner. Axel distracted Reigns, but he blocked an attempted suplex and landed one of his own on Ryback. Reigns landed some corner punches but Ryback picked Reigns up and hit a powerbomb into commercial.

Back from break Reigns caught Ryback with an elbow and sent him out of the ring. Curtis Axel tried to get after Reigns but he was thwarted. Ryback took him out from behind and shoved him into the post. Both men continued to do it, which caused the referee to ring the bell. They continued their attack in the ring before Reigns started a comeback. Reigns hit a Superman Punch on both men, and followed it up with two spears.

WINNER via DQ: Roman Reigns

Reigns was interviewed about his match with Orton. He said when you knock the teeth out of a viper, it becomes nothing more than a worthless worm. He said he never stole anything from Randy Orton, but at SummerSlam he is taking everything.

Backstage, Kane told Orton that he has a match with Sheamus tonight.

Best Present Ever

Seth Rollins vs Rob Van Dam. RVD hit a spinning heel kick in the corner followed by a standing moonsault for two. RVD went for some punches in the corner but Rollins escaped and hit some kicks. Rollins went to a headlock. RVD escaped and went for a roll up but got two. RVD caught Rollins with an elbow followed by a thrust kick off the second rope. RVD knocked Rollins into the barricade on the outside. He put Rollins on the barricade and went for a spinning leg drop off the apron but Rollins moved and RVD’s leg hit the barricade.

Back from break RVD caught Rollins with a kick to the head and a splash. RVD hit a crescent kick followed by a split leg moonsault for two. RVD went to catapult Rollins in the corner but Rollins held on to the ropes. He then hit the curb stomp for the win.

WINNER: Seth Rollins

After the match Rollins walked up the ramp. There were a bunch of present boxes set up on the stage for Hulk Hogan’s birthday. Rollins looked at one of the life sized ones then laughed it off and said it was ridiculous that he was in there. Rollins went to leave but Ambrose popped out of the box and attacked Rollins. Rollins ended up running off. Ambrose said this Sunday he’s going to get his money’s worth when he beats Rollins ass this Sunday.

It’s Officially A Soap Opera

Stephanie McMahon came out. She said as principal owner of the WWE, it is in her best business to provide the best product for everyone. And sometimes, they have to protect everyone and do things that are best for business. She brought up Daniel Bryan and said his physical therapist is here tonight. Steph invited her to the ring and said that she has something to confess. Megan talked about growing to like Daniel and Brie and how he has such an appreciation for the WWE. Megan said she can’t be Bryan’s physical therapist anymore. She said it all happened so innocently, at least at first. Steph asked what happened and she said she had an affair with Daniel Bryan. Steph hugged Megan. Brie came out and confronted Megan. Steph said the wife is always the last to know and that Megan ended every session with “Yes!” Brie slapped Megan then went after Steph. Brie applied the Yes Lock on Steph before agents broke it up. Steph said they aren’t waiting until SummerSlam, they are finishing things tonight.

The Real Americans Explode! Again!

Jack Swagger vs Cesaro. Cesaro connected on a shoulder tackle but missed a stomp. Swagger came back and caught Cesaro and slammed him to the mat. Cesaro moved out of the way of a charge and hit a gut wrench suplex. Cesaro took control and went to an abdominal stretch. Cesaro then went to an armbrar but Swagger backed Cesaro into the corner. Cesaro caught Swagger with a boot. He went to the second rope but Swagger caught Cesaro and hit a belly-to-belly. Cesaro recovered and dropped Swagger on the ropes, then kicked Swagger into the barricade.

Back from break Swagger escaped an abdominal stretch and started a comeback. He hit a Swagger Bomb. Cesaro then caught Swagger with a shot to the throat followed by a boot to the face for two. Cesaro went to the top and hit a back splash for two. Swagger blocked the apron suplex and pulled Cesaaro to the outside and clotheslined him back into the ring. Cesaro countered and tossed Swagger into the air and hit a knee to the gut, followed by an upper cut. Cesaro hit a body stomp but Swagger grabbed the ankle for the Patriot Lock but Cesaro got to the ropes. Cesaro hit an upper cut and went to the top, but Swagger pulled him down and went right into the Patriot Lock. Cesaro tapped.

WINNER: Jack Swagger

After the match, Zeb said that after SummerSlam everyone will remember the sight of the American Flag waving in the air and standing tall. Before Zeb could say We the People, Rusev and Lana appeared on stage and the Russian Flag came down in the ring.

Bray Wyatt and Chris Jericho had a sit down interview earlier. Bray told Michael Cole to leave. Bray told Jericho that he knows about his dreams and wanting to be like his dad and end up a hero. Bray said he never dreamed of being a savior. He said you can only help someone by hurting them in a way, and he’s hurt a lot of people. He said there are no consequences to his actions and he hates everything this world created. He said he’s a monster and he’s coming for Jericho at SummerSlam.

Jericho said he isn’t a savior. He’s a survivor. He said he never knows what Chris Jericho you will get. He said he is going to follow the buzzards and shove them down Bray’s throat. And he is going to be the first person to shut him up, for good.

AJ vs Eva Marie. Paige came out and skipped around the ring, distracting AJ. Eva Marie rolled up AJ to pick up the win. Paige then apologized via a poem. She ended it by saying that she would be skipping out of SummerSlam with the Divas Title. AJ then flipped out and attacked Eva Marie.

I Wonder What The Taxes Are On Brock’s House?

John Cena came out. He said in six days he is apparently going to be conquered by Brock Lesnar if you are to believe Paul Heyman. Cena said this Sunday he is going to get the beating of a lifetime, but he won’t win. Cena said he isn’t laying down for Brock Lesnar. Cena said Lesnar doesn’t deserve the Title. Cena said Lesnar is arrogant, a bully and doesn’t give a damn about anyone but himself. He said everyone backstage knows that. Cena said that he’s heard the cheers and heard the boos. Cena went through all the chants he’s heard. He then said there are a bunch of people who ask when he is going to turn, stop being about the t-shirts and start raising hell. Cena said that happens this Sunday, when he turns into a monster that does everything to keep the Title away from Brock Lesnar. Cena said this isn’t Brock Lesnar’s house, it is the WWE Universe’s house. He said if this is Brock Lesnar’s house, there is a stranger standing in his living room. And he should try to come down there and kick him out. No Lesnar. Cena said Lesnar must have come down with Punk Bitch-itis. Cena said this Sunday, he beats the conqueror and the one.

Brie came out for her match with Steph. But Steph came out and said Megan was pressing charges since Brie slapped her earlier. Brie was arrested.

The Slater Era Continues

Heath Slater vs Dolph Ziggler. Slater landed some early blows. Ziggler escaped a headlock and hit a dropkick. Ziggler missed an elbow and hit a knee drop for two. Slater hit a high kick to the face for two. Slater went to a headlock. Ziggler escaped and started a comeback. He hit the ZigZag on Slater. Miz came on the apron and Ziggler went after him. He beat him up on the outside, but Ziggler was counted out, giving Slater the win.

WINNER via Countout: Heath Slater

After the match Ziggler offered a handshake. Slater went for a kick instead, so Ziggler turned him around and hit a ZigZag.

Well The Crowd Didn’t Turn On This Like Last Time

Sheamus vs Randy Orton. Both men exchanged early blows. Sheamus hit a clothesline. Orton tossed Sheamus into the corner and hit a clothesline. Sheamus caught a charging Orton with a boot and followed it up with a powerslam and knee drop off the top. Sheamus connected on a short clothesline. Sheamus went for his rope punches but Orton bailed with an elbow.

Sheamus fought out of a headlock back from break and clotheslined Orton to the outside. On the outside, Orton caught Sheamus with a boot and backdropped him on the announce table. Back in the ring Sheamus got out of another Orton headlock with a backdrop of his own. Sheamus started a comeback with his normal set of moves. Orton bailed again to the outside. Orton caught Sheamus and went for the middle rope DDT, but Sheamus countered with his rope punches. He hit a rolling senton and got two. Sheamus telegraphed a backdrop so Orton hit a kick followed by the middle rope DDT. Sheamus rolled to the apron and caught Orton with a battering ram and another powerslam. Orton ducked a Brogue Kick and Sheamus countered the RKO. Sheamus caught Orton with a boot and went to the top, but Orton caught him on the way down with the RKO to pick up the win.

WINNER: Randy Orton

Isn’t It Past These Guys Bed Time?

Hulk Hogan Birthday with Mene Gene and Jimmy Hart hosting, and all the current stars on stage. A video package aired. Hulk said Vince gave him a card with $9.99 in it so he could subscribe to the WWE Network. Hogan talked about what a great birthday he has had. Various legends started to come out: Ric Flair, Paul Orndorff, Rowdy Piper and the nWo. Scott Hall took the mic and said it’s time to take a survey. He asked who wants to see Hulk in the red and yellow, or in the black and white of the nWo. Hall said one more for the good guys. Nash started singing Happy Birthday but Brock Lesnar came out. Lesnar told Hogan that the party was over grandpa. Cena came out and challenged Lesnar to fight, but Lesnar left the ring.


Paul Heyman/Brock Lesnar Opening: Heyman was once again great on the mic. His rap was priceless. Whatever you don’t buy, I’m pretty sure Heyman could convince you to buy it. Great job selling SummerSlam to the audience.

Jack Swagger vs Cesaro: If you would have told someone after Wrestlemania that Swagger would be getting the better push of these two after SummerSlam, they would have laughed at you. But that’s where we are now. A good match between these two. It is still kind of weird to see Swagger making a babyface comeback. It was an interesting test to see him matched against someone other than Rusev and see the reaction. It was okay, but not great. Will be interested to see if Swagger keeps the support going forward. But a good match between the two and a creative finish.

Dean Ambrose: If you don’t like Dean Ambrose then you have no soul. Every week he does something new that tops what he did the previous week. I just wish the stipulation for the match on Sunday was better than what it is.

John Cena Promo: This one just makes the cut list. I like serious Cena. He’s taken the build to this match seriously and hasn’t made any of the stupid jokes he is used to making. I’d much rather have the Cena we’ve had in this build than anything we’ve seen this year. The anti-Cena crowd was in full force on social media. You are just going to never win with them. But I liked Cena’s rebuttal to Heyman from earlier.

SummerSlam Build: Outside of a couple problems I had (see below), I thought in general the WWE did a good job with SummerSlam’s build. Roman Reigns and Randy Orton didn’t interact, but they both looked strong heading into their match Sunday. AJ and Paige had a good build, as has Swagger/Rusev. Even Miz/Ziggler had a good interaction this week. I’m looking forward to SummerSlam.


Chris Jericho/Bray Wyatt Interview: Sorry, but I’m still not buying into this program. And it actually seems like it isn’t that high on the WWE’s radar either. The interview was just a rehash of everything that we have heard already. And I like both guys, but I just can’t find myself getting into this program. Hopefully the match at SummerSlam makes up for the mediocre build this program has had.

Stephanie McMahon/Brie Bella: Talk about taking something good and ruining it. I liked the program when it started. I was hoping last week would just be a minor hiccup. But man did this week jump the shark. The whole affair thing, and then Brie getting arrested again was just bad. At least Steph still plays a heel well. But this program lost a lot of the heat it once had. There was no need to introduce this whole “Daniel Bryan cheating” thing into the storyline.

I thought the overall show was okay. The WWE was in a hard SummerSlam sell mode and I think, for the most part, they did a good job of it tonight. The Hogan Birthday thing seemed like a waste for the most part. There were a handful of okay matches but nothing that really stood out as must see. I’m going to give RAW a 6. Hopefully SummerSlam delivers on Sunday.

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka×250.jpg×250.jpg

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Trashy Ring Attire #11: With Condolences To Shaemus’ Dead Friend Mon, 11 Aug 2014 10:00:54 +0000 Welcome to Episode 11 of Trashy Ring Attire! This month’s guest is Ryan, host of the Yappa podcast! A link to listen to is posted below, AND WE ARE NOW ON ITUNES! THE OCCUPATION IS OVER! LONG LIVE THE RESISTANCE! Thanks to the Classy Ring Attire boys for setting us up, head over to iTunes and search “Trashy Ring Attire” and subscribe – new episodes will download automatically to your iTunes when available!

Also now available… one-click free download link:

Or traditional online streaming:

This month we discuss:

  • Our fragile emotional state after Shaemus misses an episode of RAW.
  • How BD accidentally invited a random dude onto the podcast in a drunken stupor.
  • Our special guest Ryan talks about his Yappa podcast! Which we are totally going on at some point.
  • Battleground thoughts
  • Following RAW thoughts
  • Rollins / Ambrose
  • Reigns / HHH / Orton
  • AJ / Paige (obvs)
  • Brock / Cena
  • New Kofi / Big E / Xavier Woods stable
  • And much, much more!

And lots more! As always, we hope you enjoy.

Next month… our favourite site recapper at the moment, the awesome SmackDown recapper Mr. David Spain!

Thanks for listening and keep it trashy!

BD & Kue

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Spain’s WWE SmackDown Report and Results for August 8th 2014: The Seth Rollins Edition Sat, 09 Aug 2014 02:18:04 +0000 Whoa!  Who the heck is this Rhett guy?  Didn’t he use to work here as a columnist?  Doesn’t he do the Roundtables and PPV Live Coverage (most of the time)?  What is he doing on a report called ‘Spain’s WWE SmackDown Report?’  Well, this week I will be filling in for the exquisite writer David Spain.  Now let’s see… Rey Mysterio and The Undertaker are the top dogs on this show right?

We open the show with the basic although-not-sure-if-I-like-it theme song of Dean Ambrose.  He comes out to the ring and JBL complains about Dean filling his hat with popcorn and soda while we get a Raw recap of it.  How about Heath Slater winning on Raw?! That’s more of a surprise than Ryder winning a few weeks ago.

Dean Ambrose says that the Authority thought they held all the cards on Monday, but they can’t plan for Dean Ambrose.  Dean says since he beat Seth Rollins on Raw in the Beat The Clock challenge so he gets to pick the stipulation.  Ambrose lists off some of the matches they could have including a ‘JBL Hat on the Pole Match’ and have alligators around the ring.  He also says they could have a ‘Loser Washes Triple H’s Car’ match, but Seth probably already does that.  Seth Rollins interrupts him and stands on the stage.  Seth calls Dean the unstable one of The Shield and himself the brains.  Seth gives Dean some credit for Monday’s events.  Seth tells him to name the stipulation.  Dean introduces Mr. Money in the Bank and says the briefcase looks rough.  Seth says that Dean isn’t going to beat him at SummerSlam.  Seth says the stipulation doesn’t matter and it will be the end of Dean Ambrose.  Seth says the people can get to see that at SummerSlam for the low price of $9.99.  Dean says the people aren’t going to pay to see Seth run.  Dean says if Seth tries to run, he’ll run into a wall of bodies.  Dean Ambrose says their match will be a Lumberjack Match.  Dean Ambrose says that SummerSlam is the day Mr. Money in the Bank goes broke.  Seth says he’s not going anywhere.  Seth says no matter what happens at SummerSlam he will still be Mr. Money in the Bank.  Seth says The Authority has given him the right to pick Dean’s opponent for tonight.  He picks Randy Orton.  Randy Orton vs. Dean Ambrose.  Could be a fun main event.


Monday is Hulk Hogan’s birthday bash.  That’ll be fun.

Mark Henry & Big Show vs. Rybaxel

First time we’ve seen Big Show in awhile and I’ve actually missed the big lug a little bit.  Maybe he’ll do a Hulk Hogan imitation on Monday.  Henry and Axel start this off.  Axel moves around Henry and mocks Axel by moving slowly then rolls out of the ring when Henry charges.  Axel rolls back in and Henry catches him with some clubbing blows.  Axel looks stunned and tags in Ryback.  Ryback tells Henry to hit him.  They lock up and Henry flings him back.  Ryback is smirking and pushes Henry.  Henry pushes him back.  Henry rams Ryback in the corner.  Henry whips Ryback across the ring.  He flings him off the rope.  Henry picks him up for the World’s Strongest Slam, but Axel chop blocks Henry.  They double team for a minute before Ryback hits some knees to Henry.  Ryback teases a powerbomb, but Henry flings him over.  Show tags in, hits some clotheslines and a big boot.  He flings Ryback to Henry for the WSM and hits a big Chokeslam on Curtis Axel for the pin.

Winners:  The Big Show & Mark Henry

Dolph Ziggler is in the back with Rosa Mendes, Eva Marie, and Adam Rose.  Seth comes up and calls Dolph’s career a joke.  Seth says he’s going to pick his own opponent for tonight as well.  Dolph says that sounds like a challenge.  Seth says you bet your ass it’s a challenge.


JBL and Michael Cole hype the WWE Network.

Sin Cara vs. Damien Sandow (as a Border Patrol Officer)

They lock up and Sandow hits some big blows to Sin Cara’s face.  Sandow goes for the Elbow of Disdain.  He locks in the side headlock.  Cara fights out and hits a springboard body splash times three.  He hits a tiltawhirl armdrag.  Sandow hits a backdrop for two.  Sandow goes for the full nelson, but it’s reversed into an Angle Slam.  Sin Cara hits a Senton Bomb for the three count.

Winner:  Sin Cara


JBL and Cole hype Occulus and discuss Brock vs. Cena.  Video package of Brock vs. Cena.  I know Mr. Spain loves those.


Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins

Dolph Ziggler is fighting The Miz at SummerSlam.  They lock up with vigor.  Seth hits some elbows on Dolph in the corner.  He flings Dolph across the ring by his hair.  Seth throws Dolph on his neck on the top rope.  Seth locks in a camel clutch.  Dolph fights back but Seth stops him with the Triple Vertical.  Seth chokes Dolph on the second rope.  Seth locks in a side headlock.  Dolph fights up and hits a big jawbreaker.  Dolph ducks a clothesline and hits some big drop kicks.  He goes for the Fameasser, but Seth throws him over the top rope onto the floor.


Dolph is pounding on Seth as we come back, but Seth hits a kick to Dolph’s jaw.  Seth rubs Dolph’s face on the mat.  Seth goes outside and hits blows to Dolph’s body laid over the edge.  He kicks Dolph to knock him back in the ring.  Seth gets back in and toys with Dolph.  Seth stomps on Dolph’s head on the bottom rope.  He continues to taunt Ziggler.  Ziggler goes off the ropes, but eats a big elbow for two.  Side headlock and Dolph pushes Seth into the corner to break it up.  Dolph hits some drop kicks and a big Splash in the corner.  Dolph goes for the 10 count in the corner.  Dolph hits a neckbreaker for two.  Dolph hits a belly to back suplex for two.  They exchange blows and Dolph splashes down on Seth for two.  Dolph goes for a corner splash and misses.  Seth goes for a suplex, but Dolph rolls him up for two.  They trade blows, Seth goes off the ropes, but eats a big high-impact DDT from Dolph for two.  Dolph goes for the ZigZag, but Seth rolls him up for two.  Seth pulls Dolph’s head down on the top rope.  Seth is on the apron and goes for the springboard knee, but Dolph dodges and hits the Fameasser.  Dolph pounds away on Seth, but Seth kicks Dolph’s knee and throws him between the top and second rope into the ringpost.  Dolph falls to the floor.  Seth goes outside and picks him up and throws him into the barricade.  Seth asks what’s funny now?  Seth throws Dolph into the steel steps.  The referee continues to count.  Seth picks up Dolph and rolls him in.  Seth is getting cocky now.  Seth taunts Dolph and screams at him.  Seth Rollins hits the Curb Stomp and gets the three count.

Winner:  Seth Rollins

Randy Orton is in the back with Renee Young.  She asks him about his match tonight.  Orton says Ambrose is unstable, but he is uncontrollable.  Orton says he doesn’t even know what he’ll do when he gets his hand on Ambrose.  Orton says that he is the most unstable.


Natalya vs. Paige

Paige skips to the ring.  They recap last week where AJ is pushed off the stage by Paige.  Paige pushes Natalya.  Nattie slaps her.  Nattie hits a double arm suplex.  Natalya locks in the sharpshooter.  Paige crawls to the ropes and pulls the ring skirt when Nattie pulls her back.  Paige hits the Paige Turner on the outside and screams at Natalya.  Paige skips around the ring.  Nattie barely makes it back in.  Nattie tries to roll up Paige, but it’s only two.  Paige slaps Nattie hard and locks in the Paige Tap Out.  Nattie obliges and taps.

Winner:  Paige

Rusev is on his way to the ring when he’s interrupted by an All American…


Big E is in the ring when we return.

Big E vs. Rusev

Rusev pounds away at Big E and Big E responds back with some.  Rusev throws him in the corner and hits some big kicks.  Rusev strikes Big E in the face taking him to the mat.  Rusev is yelling at Big E.  Big E stops Rusev’s charge with an elbow.  Big E hits a belly-to-belly suplex.  Big E goes for the running splash and misses.  Rusev locks in The Accolade and Big E taps.

Winner:  Rusev

Chris Jericho is backstage and says that Bray Wyatt is a virus in the WWE.  He says he has the antidote to the poison and it’s spelled Y2J.  Jericho says he’s going to grab the buzzards and stuff them down Bray’s throat.


JBL and Cole discuss the WWE Network going global for… $9.99.

They show a Raw Rebound for the Brie Bella vs. Stephanie feud.


Dean Ambrose vs. Randy Orton

They circle around.  Orton kicks Dean, but Dean throws him in the corner and hits some strikes.  Orton goes outside to collect himself before coming back in to be put in a headlock.  They do some reversals and Dean ties up Orton’s legs and claws Orton’s traps.  Ambrose hits a running elbow on to Orton for three.  Dean wraps Orton’s arms around him, but Orton reverses out and boot him to the chest.  Orton stomps on Ambrose’s leg in the corner.  Dean pulls himself up and unloads on Randy’s face.  (Heh)  Ambrose launches himself over the top rope on to Orton.


Ambrose is hitting headbutts, but Orton whips him hard into the corner hard.  Orton begins dissecting Dean.  Orton headbutts and strikes Ambrose in the corner.  Dean comes back, but Orton targets the injured arm of Dean.  Orton has an armlock on Dean.  Dean says why don’t you put some pressure on it.  Orton obliges.  Dean fights up and headbutts Orton.  Orton kicks him, whips him into the rope, but Dean hits a DDT.  The ref begins counting, but they get up and Dean punches Orton’s face.  Dean is a house of fire and hits some big punches to Orton’s face.  Dean rams Orton in the corner, rakes his eyes, and hits a big swinging DDT from the top rope for a two count.  Dean goes for Dirty Deeds, but Orton reverses.  Orton gets flung outside.  Dean runs toward the ropes and Orton punches him!  Orton pulls him outside and starts flinging him into the steel steps.  Orton pulls Dean to the apron and goes for the drapped DDT, but Dean flings Orton over the top rope.  Dean hits a suicide dive.  They come back in, Orton punches Dean, Dean bounces back from the ropes for a big clothesline.  Seth distracts Dean for Orton to set up the RKO.  He reverses and hits Dirty Deeds.  He goes for the cover, but Seth pulls him out.  Seth beats up on Dean until they roll back in.  Orton hits an RKO on Dean and Seth pounds away on Dean.  Seth steals a lady’s drink and climbs back into the ring.  Seth pours it on Dean’s face.  Seth says at SummerSlam it’s the end for Dean.  Seth hits a nasty Curb Stomp.  Seth rips off Dean’s shirt and stands tall as SmackDown comes to a close.

Winner:  (by DQ)  Dean Ambrose


Thanks for reading!

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My Thoughts: WWE RAW 8.4.14 (John Cena, Roman Reigns, Brock Lesnar, Kane) Tue, 05 Aug 2014 04:03:33 +0000 WWE Raw Header - 2014

{1} WOAH! I just realized how little we posted last week besides for the Hulk Hogan & Paul Heyman interviews. I sincerely apologize for that & promise more content this week, including an exclusive interview with former WWE/TNA/ECW star, Justin Credible on Thursday at 8 PM est. You’ll be able to hear it live on our Blog Talk Radio station right here.

{2} As much as I love Roman Reigns’s push and the way it has played out, get Kane off of the active roster. Reigns in a Last Standing Match against almost ANYONE else on the roster and you could have had a main event match but not Kane. And he was so close to reinventing himself as the maskless “Corporate Kane” just a few months ago before they shoved the mask back on him & now his time in the ring is done.

{3} I know I might be in the minority here but I hate the idea of doing a UFC-style video package for John Cena & Brock Lesnar and their match at SummerSlam. Why not show some of their matches BEFORE Lesnar left the WWE for years. Show Lesnar at the top of SmackDown when Cena was doing his best to get noticed. Hell, Cena’s first WWE Championship opportunity was against Lesnar! Show THEIR past together. Everyone knows that Brock Lesnar was a UFC Heavyweight Champion and absolutely everyone knows that John Cena has been the World Champion 15 times. Talk about their parallel OVW & WWE careers instead of focusing on events that DIDN’T EVEN HAPPEN IN YOUR COMPANY!

{4} Did they really just announce that next week will be Hulk Hogan’s “birthday celebration”? On the go-home show of Monday Night RAW before the second biggest PPV of the year, SummerSlam. It happens a lot in the WWE but that really showcased where the company’s priorities lie.

{5} I’m still pretty shocked that Alberto Del Rio has a job & it just bugs me when they put him in the ring with Dean Ambrose. Del Rio never turned out to be the “huge” star many wanted him to be & now is a serviceable heel for matches like this one but Ambrose isn’t going to get over more by beating Del Rio. Even though he is a former WWE and World Champion, I just don’t see Del Rio being a name you remember 5 or 10 years from now.

{6} It’s great that Dolph Ziggler is getting some time on RAW but neither him nor Cesaro get television entrances?! They didn’t even get WWE App entrances! And then the matches lasts all of 4 minutes with Cesaro losing cleanly and quickly. Why does one of these two have to suffer & not both skyrocket to the top?

{7} DID KANE JUST RETIRE FROM IN-RING COMPETITION?! DID MY DREAM FINALLY COME TRUE?! Don’t get me wrong, I loved Kane in his prime, he has had a Hall Of Fame career with some fantastic moments but those moments peaked with Team Hell No. That should have been Kane’s “swan song”. Not after hitting his 20 year mark & having the world have to witness his decline.

{8} Another good match featuring Luke Harper & this time it was against the always great Chris Jericho. I’m beginning to get anxious for Harper’s singles run in the future because his ring style of Bruiser Brody/super agile big man is going to be over huge when he gets a chance to shine.

{9} I thought we might see Seth Rollins lose his Beat The Clock match since Ambrose’s match lasted so very long. Once Heath Slater was introduced (to the “We’re A 3 Man Bannnnnd!” entrance theme, by the way) it became blatantly obvious. Ambrose’s antics outside of the ring were excellent. It was nice to see Dean portray his “unstable” character in a more subtle, rebellious way than the out-of-control man we’ve seen since his debut. This was definitely Ambrose in babyface mode and strangely enough, it reminded me of the antics the late Eddie Guerrero would get up to.

{10} I know I’m not the only one thinking that someone was supposed to come out to help the Bellas but in actuality, who would? Daniel Bryan is home recovering. John Cena isn’t supposed to be in the building and they’ve yet to really show his & Nikki’s relationship on RAW or SmackDown yet. Roman Reigns has to zero in on Randy Orton & Dean Ambrose is probably out buying JBL a new hat. There was no logical Superstar to “make the save” and it was somewhat interesting. Like I said before, I thought someone was supposed to come out but they broke traditional and let the two heels stand over the two fallen women, victorious. Brie Bella and Stephanie McMahon’s match at SummerSlam may not be the best but emotions are going to be running extremely high & hopefully the LA crowd is into this feud as much or more than the past few arenas (and those reactions were already extremely hot. If it wasn’t for the 15 or so video packages, this might have been more than a middle-of-the-road show.×120-2013.jpg×250-raw-2013.jpg

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WWE Monday Night RAW LIVE Results For 8/4/14: The Road To SummerSlam Continues Mon, 04 Aug 2014 23:31:26 +0000 We are less than two weeks away from SummerSlam, or SummerFest as Jeremy Piven might call it. All three of the key players in the WWE Title Match won’t be there. But Paul Heyman did promise a candid, unscripted interview from Brock Lesnar. And to the surprise of no one, The Authority will start the show.

Triple H: The Ultimate Troll

All of The Authority came out to start the show. HHH said he isn’t the guy to pat himself on the back, but he is going to now. He said he thinks this could be the biggest SummerSlam ever. HHH listed a couple matches, then plugged the WWE Network in between. It seemed like a pretty good troll job. HHH said Dean Ambrose will take on Alberto del Rio later tonight, and Seth Rollins will take on Rob Van Dam. And whoever wins their match the quickest in the Beat the Clock Challenge will get to pick the stipulation for their match. Steph then talked about her contract signing later and said if Brie gets out of line she will put her in a hospital bed right next to her husband. HHH said that you can catch it on the WWE Network again for $9.99 a month. Randy Orton then took the mic and said that he looks forward to beating down Roman Reigns and you can still see the marks on the table from his beatdown last week.

Roman Reigns then came through the crowd. Reigns said that he took a beatdown from Orton last week but he is still standing there. Reigns then said that he was going to come down there and kick Randy Orton’s ass for free. HHH said Orton gets Reigns at SummerSlam, but Reigns gets to fight Kane tonight in a Last Man Standing Match.

Kane’s Wig Has Seen Better Days

The match started back from break. Kane hit a DDT. Kane hit a couple of uppercuts in the corner then a clothesline, but Reigns caught Kane with a boot then came back with a clothesline of his own. They went to the outside where Reigns slammed Kane’s head into the announce table then threw Kane into the steps. Reigns then jumped off the steps and hit a clothesline. Reigns slammed Kane into the barricade, but Kane reversed Reigns and tossed him into the steps. Kane placed the steps upright in front of the ramp but Reigns blocked an attempt to get thrown into the steps and Reigns tossed Kane into the barricade again. Kane got up at 6 then tossed Reigns into the barricade. Kane got a kendo stick and nailed Reigns multiple times with it. Reigns recovered and tossed Kane over the barricade into commercial.

Back from break Reigns reversed Kane and tossed him into a chair set up in the corner. Reigns hit a couple clotheslines then his apron dropkick. Kane rolled to the outside where Reigns tossed Kane into the steps. Reigns grabbed a table and tossed it into the ring. Kane came from behind and took out Reigns, then set up a table in the ring. Reigns caught a charging Kane and hit a Samoan Drop. Reigns went for a Superman Punch but Kane caught him and chokeslammed Reigns through the table. Reigns got up at 9. Kane went for a Tombstone on the chair but Reigns escaped and hit a DDT on the chair. Reigns connected on the Superman Punch. Kane blocked a Spear attempt and went for a chokeslam, but Reigns escaped and hit a Spear. Kane didn’t get up before ten and Reigns picked up the win.

WINNER: Roman Reigns

Brock Lesnar/John Cena video promo. He said he didn’t care who the f*** was in his way, he came back to be WWE Champion. He doesn’t respect anyone and he doesn’t care who he pisses off. He said he didn’t get why people were surprised that he beat The Undertaker. Cena came on and said he didn’t like talking about his accomplishments, and he likes to look forward and not back. Lesnar said he’s going to tear Cena apart limb from limb and it is going to be ugly. He said if he hadn’t left there would be no John Cena and Cena would be buying Fruity Pebbles instead of being on the box. Cena said Lesnar is a hired mercenary who only cares about himself. Lesnar said he is going to leave Cena in a pile of blood, urine and vomit.

Damien Sandow came out in an Oklahoma shirt (the show is in Texas). He ripped on the Longhorns before Mark Henry came out and made quick work of him.

Dean Ambrose’s Taped Shoulder Is This Generation’s DDP’s Taped Ribs

Dean Ambrose vs Alberto del Rio. Del Rio landed a dropkick. Ambrose backed Del Rio into the corner and landed some punches. Del Rio then tossed Ambrose into the corner and hit an enziguri kick. Del Rio landed some more kicks but Ambrose came right back with some more punches. Del Rio rolled to the outside and tossed Ambrose into the barricade. Del Rio hit a clothesline off the top. Del Rio landed another kick to the head and tossed Ambrose into the ringpost. Del Rio started to work over the injured arm of Ambrose. Ambrose reversed Del Rio on the outside and tossed him into the barricade. He followed it up with a suplex on the floor. Back in the ring Ambrose landed some punches and a couple clotheslines. Ambrose went for a tilt-a-whirl DDT off the second rope but Del Rio tossed him away then hit a kick to the head into commercial.

Del Rio worked over Ambrose’s injured arm back from break and then hit a DDT. Del Rio went to kick Ambrose’s head into the post but Ambrose moved, then hit a dive to the outside. Ambrose hit a missile dropkick in the ring. He connected on a tornado DDT for two. Del Rio tossed Ambrose into the corner then hit a reverse DDT/suplex off the second rope for two. Ambrose recovered and went for Dirty Deeds but Del Rio countered and hit an armdrop then an armbreaker in the ropes. Del Rio went for the cross armbreaker but Ambrose countered and hit Dirty Deeds for the win.

WINNER: Dean Ambrose

This Is Leading To President Obama vs Rusev At Wrestlemania Isn’t It?

Rusev defeated Sin Cara during the break on the WWE App. Lana then sang Happy Birthday to President Obama in Russian. Jack Swagger and Zeb came out. He said he now gets why Russian men drink so much. Zeb said he is sick of hearing about Vladimir Putin, Mother Russia and Rusev Crush. He said at SummerSlam they will be fighting every Real American in the world. After the “We the People” Lana got in Zeb’s face, so Rusev attacked Swagger with the flag. Rusev eyed down Zeb but Lana stopped him and did a mocking “We the People.”

How The Once Promising Have Fallen

It’s Cesaro vs Dolph Ziggler. Cesaro caught Ziggler with a quick boot to the face. Dolph recovered and went for a splash in the corner but Cesaro caught him and hit a backbreaker for two. Dolph went for a small package but Cesaro stopped it and went for a suplex. Cesaro showed off his strength but Ziggler escaped and hit the ZigZag for the win.

WINNER: Dolph Ziggler

After the match Miz posed in the ring with the IC Title belt. Ziggler went for a superkick but Miz quickly moved away.

Paige was interviewed. She wished AJ well and said she can’t wait to face her idol and best friend at SummerSlam.

Goldust and Stardust made quick work of Rybaxel.

Kane walked into The Authority’s office, took off the mask and handed it to Stephanie McMahon.

Have To Save Time For That Contract Signing

It’s Chris Jericho vs Luke Harper. Harper went to work early on Jericho with some blows. Jericho fought back with some Flair chops but Harper came right back with a clothesline. He followed up with some elbows. Jericho escaped a press slam and connected on an enziguri kick. Jericho hit some kicks to the chest but Harper came back with a Michinoku Driver for two. Harper placed Jericho on the top but Jericho pushed him away. He missed an axe handle off the top and Harper connected on a boot for two. Harper connected on a powerbomb but only got two again. Harper tossed Jericho into the corner but Jericho hit him with an elbow then a running bulldog. Jericho dropkicked Rowan off the apron then applied the Walls of Jericho to Harper. The lights went out and Bray Wyatt then appeared at the ramp. Jericho caught Rowan with a Codebreaker. Harper hit Jericho from behind but Jericho came back with another Codebreaker. Bray Wyatt then came in the ring and took out Jericho, and finished it off with Sister Abigail. Luke Harper is now banned from ringside for Bray and Jericho’s SummerSlam match.

WINNER via DQ: Chris Jericho

Diego beat Fandango. Hornswoggle was Fandango’s new dance partner but after the match he joined up with Diego, El Torito, Layla and Summer Rae.

Randy Orton was interviewed. He said Roman Reigns better keep his head on a swivel because he is going to kick it off.

Bo Dallas beat R-Truth in a quick match with a roll-up while holding the tights. R-Truth went after him after the match but Bo Dallas got the upper hand and hit the  Bo-Dog on the floor.

Bray Wyatt promo. He said he is the Nightmare at the end of Chris Jericho’s dream.


Before RVD vs Seth Rollins started, Justin Roberts announced that per The Authority, RVD would not be Rollins opponent. Instead, it was Heath Slater. Rollins offered Slater the opportunity to just walk out and leave but instead Slater went after Rollins. Rollins quickly recovered and went to work on Slater with some kicks. Dean Ambrose came down to ringside to distract Rollins. Slater hit a neckbreaker and got two. Ambrose took the MITB briefcase then ripped the contract up. Slater then hit a spinning heel kick but only got two. Ambrose the took a drink and poured it in the briefcase. He put some popcorn in there as well along with JBL’s hat. Ambrose stood on the announce table with the briefcase. Slater rolled up Rollins to pick up the win.

WINNER: Heath Slater


Brie and Stephanie McMahon contract signing. Triple H said normally when an icon steps out of retirement for a contract signing he presides over it, but since that icon is his wife and mother of his children he had to step aside. He said he’s there tonight as a loving and proud husband. Brie asked for them to hurry up before they all puked. Steph said Brie should know about supportive spouses and asked where her hippy dippy husband was. Brie asked if Steph was recovered from her arrest. Brie said she was going to embarrass Steph in front of the entire WWE Universe and show that Steph is a fraud, failure and embarrassment to the McMahon Family. Brie listed a bunch of people Steph has wronged and the crowd broke out into a CM Punk chant. Brie said karma always comes back to haunt people.

Steph said that she’s sure all those people she named would be thrilled to know that she is representing them. Steph said that Brie is nothing more than a wannabe reality star. Steph said she is embarrassed to be in the same ring as Brie and is going to put an end to her attempt to make history. Steph said she is going to tear Brie’s heart out at SummerSlam. Steph then slapped Nikki as HHH blocked Brie from helping by pushing her into the corner behind the table. Steph hit a Pedigree on Nikki. Brie slapped HHH then went for Steph but Steph slammed Brie’s head on the table and then hit a Pedigree on her. Steph then made out with HHH to close the show.


Brock Lesnar/John Cena Video Package: Once again, another great job by the WWE Production Team. With both guys not on RAW, they still did a good job of building up the match and making it feel like a big fight. I like how Lesnar just came off so nonchalant about kicking Cena’s ass, as if it was just another day for him. If they make video packages like that for all of Lesnar’s Title reign, it’ll be fun to watch.

Kane vs Roman Reigns: Perfectly acceptable TV match between these two. A one-on-one singles match probably wouldn’t have been as good. The Last Man Standing gimmick made it better to watch. Neither guy is a technical wrestler so adding weapons helped. I’m assuming Kane took off his mask to begin the promotion of his new movie.

Dean Ambrose vs Alberto del Rio: Another good TV match here. This is what I wanted from RAW when it went to three hours: 3 or 4 10-15 minute TV matches every week that make the show watchable. Ambrose and Del Rio are both good wrestlers. It’s just a shame that Del Rio has fallen so far down the totem pole.

Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins vs Heath Slater: That was a fun segment. Ambrose was great as usual. And it doesn’t matter about it taking away from the match. The point was Ambrose getting back at The Authority for trying to make things easy for Rollins and being the pain in the ass thorn in The Authority’s side.


Cesaro vs Dolph Ziggler: So in one week’s time, Cesaro goes from losing to John Cena in a competitive match where it took an AA off the second rope to win, to losing to Dolph Ziggler in less than two minutes. Here’s where they could have had another 10-15 minute match and maybe have Cesaro lose via botched Miz interference. It’s a damn shame the WWE has no idea what to do with Cesaro. I would have never thought I would complain after a Dolph Ziggler win but it didn’t really do anything for Cesaro, or even Ziggler really here.

Steph/Brie Bella Contract Signing: I didn’t like this closing the show two weeks in a row. They could have put Roman Reigns/Kane here. The acting was bad this week from both of them. Everything about it just felt weird. It still has some heat behind it but it might have lost a little this week.

$9.99: If you did a shot every time during the show they mentioned the price of the WWE Network, your Blood Alcohol Level would be 9.99. It was funny at first when HHH was doing it as an obvious troll job, but the troll job reached annoying as hell levels by the end of the show. I bet they might have even lost some subscribers because of it. The problem with the WWE is that they don’t know when to stop.

Chris Jericho/Bray Wyatt: Surprisingly, this is the match I might be least excited for on the SummerSlam card. The build just doesn’t seem like anything different. I think they will have a good match but the build up to it is just off. People are talking about Cesaro losing a lot of steam, but I think Bray has lost some too.

No Usos or Sheamus: For the second week in a row we do not see Sheamus and this week no Usos. That is almost unacceptable on a three hour show. Especially with an act as over as The Usos.

This RAW seemed very much like a place holder show before one final big push for SummerSlam next week. There was some good wrestling on the show but nothing outstanding. I’m going to give the show a 4.

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka×250.jpg×250.jpg

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Spain’s WWE SmackDown Report and Results for August 1st 2014: We’re Not Even Good Enough To Provide Title Match Build Sun, 03 Aug 2014 13:11:40 +0000 Hey there, ladies and gentlemen. I apologise for this thing going up so late; I’ve been wined and dined kind of consecutively, and my moral character is not strong enough to break away from free alcohol and say ‘well, I guess it’s time to write my review’. But I’m here now, with a nice Kenyan coffee (a very decent region, if you haven’t tried it), and am ready to write this son of a bitch.

Can You Guys Just Pick Your Fucking Jannetty?

We start this thing off with the Real American, who’s still dragging around that flag. Seriously, I’m just reminded of these words from author Terry Pratchett: ‘I’d be very worried if I saw a man singing the national anthem and waving the flag, sir. It’s really a thing foreigners do. We don’t need to show we’re patriotic, sir…we don’t have to make a fuss about being the best. We just know.’ We see RAW, where we got Zeb Coulter’s take on the song America: Fuck Yeah and Jack claiming the ring for America. He’s facing Cesaro, and his siren has been changed from air raid siren to European police siren: if that’s to imply he’s no longer as much as a threat, that’s actually pretty funny.

Both former Real Americans tie up, with Jack getting a waistlock only for Cesaro to outwrestle him. Waistlock takeovers from Swagger, and he goes for the Patriot Lock, only for Cesaro to scramble out of the ring. Back in the ring, the men exchange blows, with Swagger clotheslining Cesaro in the corner. Thumb to the eye by Cesaro, and then a big boot right to the face. Gutwrench suplex to Swagger, and then a sleeper attempt; Swagger forces his way clear, but then runs right into a powerslam off the ropes. Cesaro straddles Jack (ew) and punches him in the face. Swagger ends up holding himself up on the ropes, and Cesaro slaps him. I don’t get why a slap is supposed to annoy someone more than kicking them in the face or gutwrenching them, but apparently Swagger prescribes to that psychology, and strikes Cesaro with an elbow, then a clothesline. Cesaro’s whipped into a corner, then runs into a boot. Cesaro’s in position for a Swagger Bomb, but he pops up, catches Jack’s legs and throws him out of the ring!

Back from a commercial break, Cesaro and Swagger are on the top rope. Cesaro wants a superplex; Jack punches his way clear and jumps…right into an uppercut. Near-fall, and Swagger’s trying to get back into it, but Cesaro’s always one strike ahead…until Swagger catches him and drives him down into the mat. This time the Swagger Bomb hits, but for a two-count only. Cesaro hangs Swagger up on the ropes, and hits a tiger bomb. Cesaro gets distracted by Coulter, and Swagger gets the Patriot Lock…and Cesaro taps out instantly.

So…okay? I mean, yeah, I know Swagger’s getting ready to face Rusev at the big show, but Cesaro tapped to him? And that fast? After a great match with Cena just on Monday? Silly David, expecting logical decisions. Still, can’t really complain about the rest of the match. 2.5 Stars.

After the match, Swagger raises the flag, staring at it with naked lust in his eyes. This preternatural courtship is interrupted by Rusev, who has his own flag with him. I’m waiting for this to go all Michaels/Hart and have Swagger humping the Russian flag, because that is literally how WWE responds to political and global turmoil. She challenges them for a Flag Match at SummerSlam, which fuels my certainty we’ll be seeing some Swag-on-Flag action. Coulter says that Real Americans don’t run from a call to action to defend the country. Unless they’re Orton, who apparently went AWOL that one time. He says that all Real Americans accept this match; as a Real Italian/British/Spanish/possibly Norwegian, I really don’t.

Speak of the dishonourably-discharged devil: it’s Randy Orton. God, could that t-shirt be any more aimed at ten year olds? Orton immediately says he has no issue with Lesnar, and this is what is fucking wrong with Orton right now. What happened to the guy who would RKO people because they happened to be the closest person to him? Why does he not have an issue with every single person ever anymore? Why hasn’t he shivved Heyman yet? But he is going after Roman Reigns, so at least some of that nihilistic desire to injure someone is in still there. We replay his beating of Reigns, and I still think they missed a trick by not having Orton RKO Kane after that chokeslam before turning to Roman. Then have Orton destroy Kane in a match this Monday: ramp up the danger factor. Challenge is made for SummerSlam, which does make sense, really.

The Greatest Trick The Devil Ever Pulled Was Convincing The World He Didn’t Exist

R-Truth is in the ring, and here’s Bo Dallas. Okay, I don’t as a rule love undefeated streaks. If you want to make a storyline out of them and make them a challenge for other people: well and good. But just having them there is a bit of an irritation, and we had Bo, technically Rusev and, if you can believe it, Adam Rose. Bo, I think, is going to be more interesting now we have to move out of the ‘x and Bo’ part of his character, so I’m glad the streak ended. I would, however, say that whoever went to a Creative meeting and said: ‘why not R-Truth?’ should be beaten by a big sack full of doorknobs.

Bo offers a hand, like the stand-up guy he is, and R-Truth attacks him, like the ex-convict he is. Dallas rolls out of the ring and Truth follows him, throwing him back in. Truth misses a splash to the corner, and Bo hits some elbows, but misses a clothesline and nearly gets rolled up. Crossbody from R-Truth, and then Bo manages to drive him into the corner, hitting strikes. The ref tries to make the count in that shrill voice of his, and Bo gets disqualified.

See, more interesting a character now. Match was kind of not really a thing, but all in the service of character development. 1.5 Stars.

After attacking Truth for a good while, Bo gets on the mic and says that Truth got what was coming to him. He says the crowd has not lost faith, because they Bo-lieve in him.

Hence The Saying ‘On A Scale Of “Rosa Mendes” to “AJ Lee”…’

Rosa Mendes is in the ring, and she’ll be facing Divas Champion, AJ Lee. We repeat AJ and Paige’s fight from RAW, and holy shit, I’ve just realised that they look exactly like Elia Martell and Lyanna Stark respectively (I’ve been reading the books again, so be thankful this is the first A Song of Ice and Fire reference I’ve made). Why would Paige pick a fight with the girl who put Punk and Bryan through a table?

AJ applies the Black Widow; Rosa Mendes taps.

Considering we almost saw a Rosa Mendes match, I have no complaints. 1.5 Stars.

AJ skips up the ramp, but then gets girly-pushed off it by Paige. Paige keeps saying ‘she’s fine! She’s fine! She’s overreacting!’, and that actually hauntingly familiar of my time served in clubs. Wow, I’d read the preview of this online and had thought it was some kind of massive assault; apparently not.

Ambrose is backstage, still with his magical healing bandages, and says that he’s sure that Hunter thinks that this handicap match is funny, and that all they want to do is protect Seth Rollins. Dean says that Kane being there doesn’t matter; he’s getting to Rollins tonight.

We get an update that AJ got carried out on a stretcher with a neckbrace. See, Brie Bella would have sued for that.

Does Michael Cole Not Understand Tag Team Wrestling?

Here’s Kane, making his way to the ring. He’s followed by Seth Rollins, and finally Dean Ambrose. We repeat Rollins’ assault on Dean from this past Friday, and Michael calls Seth out on jumping Ambrose when that’s pretty much Dean’s deal as well. I love how Michael will occasionally make such a skewed moral statement that he doesn’t even try to defend it when JBL argues with him.

Ambrose and Kane to start off, but Dean tries to jump Seth and Kane immediately goes after Ambrose. Dean dodges a charge, raining punches down on Kane until he runs into an uppercut. Seth calls for the tag, but Ambrose fights for a moment and runs into a big boot. Seth comes in, stomping Dean and wrenching his shoulder, then working him in the corner. Ambrose comes off the ropes and wrenches back Seth’s head to the mat. Rollins tags out, which is tantamount to setting fire to a baby penguin in Michael Cole’s ethical system. Kane quickly regains control, working on the shoulder and tossing Dean shoulder-first into the turnbuckle. Seth taunts Dean on the outside as Kane wraps the shoulder around the post.

Back in the ring, Rollins gets the tag, and would you just look at this depraved motherfucker? Ambrose tries to mount offence, but Rollins is too fresh, working on Ambrose before tagging in Kane. JBL manages to back Michael into having to admit he was either wrong before or wrong now, and can we appreciate this Texan millionaire’s noble crusade for a moment? Big sidewalk slam to Ambrose, and Rollins tags in again. Christ, this guy is actually worse than Hitler. Rollins stalks Ambrose, and tries for a powerbomb, but gets backdropped. Both Rollins and Kane get tossed to the outside, with Dean throwing himself over the ropes at them. Seth gets thrown back in the ring, and Ambrose drop-toeholds Kane into the steps. Dean goes right after Rollins, stomping him into the corner. The ref’s counting, but Dean is channelling Bo Dallas at this stage. He hurls Rollins across the ring by the hair, then Kane drags Ambrose out of the ring, hurling him into the timekeeper’s area. Ambrose comes right back with a chair, clobbering Kane and Rollins, only to get put down with a boot by Kane. Kane tries to chokeslam Dean onto the chair, but Dean reverses to DDT Kane onto it instead; Rollins makes himself scarce and Ambrose beats Kane out of the ring with the chair.

I rather liked this. Ambrose plays the guy you can’t ever count out, with the slightly manic tilt to it. I enjoy how he’ll get so far into a match and then clearly think ‘screw it’. Adds something to the roster. 2.5 Stars.

Renee Young is backstage with Chris Jericho, and we look at the past couple of weeks of him getting the shit kicked out of him. Jericho says that at Battleground it was his night, but he’s since been paying the price. He really pushes the spider metaphor, which is a good way to destroy a metaphor. Plus, can he stop saying ‘let’s get crazy’ and then not getting crazy?

Oops, looks like Stardust got into the adrenochrome again. And Goldust is wearing a hat. Does the Cosmic Key unlock the door to the room they’re locked in so they can actually wrestle? It’s not like I’m not enjoying what Cody’s doing here, but I want to see him interact with…sane people.

Still Not As Bad As What Happened To Lita

Oh God, it’s Fandango, so I know what’s coming next. Yep, Diego and El Torito. Admittedly, Layla looks fairly breathtaking in her matador outfit that actually looks more pirate-y. I will say, this is kind of an elaborate crusade by a pair of women scorned. I suppose he should be happy they haven’t paid someone to give him herpes. You know what’s a thing that happens? That.

Bell rings and Fandango goes right after Diego, knocking his bullfighting ass down. The Matador gets thrown out of the ring, flips back in and Fandango turns it into a backbreaker. El Torito distracts Fandango, and then runs behind Layla and Summer Rae. Diego tries to take advantage of the distraction, but Fandango hangs him up on the ropes. Wow, when did he get so smart? Oh, but then Torito starts dancing with the ladies, and who in the back decided to play the music just then? Backstabber to Fandango, and that’s the match. The stupid, stupid match.

I don’t know who writes these comedy segments, or who they’re directed at. But I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t get along with any of them. 0.5 Stars.

Ziggler’s The Most Easily-Distracted Man In Wrestling

Oh boy, we’re going to be listening to the epic stylings of the Miz, who has already worn out his welcome in my eyes. But it’s a Del Rio match, so I should be able to drown him out. Alberto’s opponent is Ziggler, Michael calls them ‘two former World Champions’, and I admit that did throw me for a moment. Oh God, and the Miz was the WWE Champion.

Alberto immediately goes on the attack, but Ziggler ducks a clothesline and hits a dropkick, throwing hands to Del Rio. He builds offence, but gets pancaked and Del Rio sleepers him. Dolph jawbreakers his way out, dodges a charge and hits a clothesline and then a stinger splash, following it up with a neckbreaker. Miz says he can’t talk about his future movie projects, probably because they’re so tragic anyone listening would weep themselves to death. Dolph misses the Fameasser and gets German-suplexed for the pin. Superkick misses; the big DDT does not and Miz gets a microphone. Wow, spiffy red trousers on that guy. He says he wants to thank a few people for his success; this would be funnier if he wasn’t actually repeating the same names, which is just lazy writing. Thank the barista who makes the best latte ever, or list the girls who write you fanmail. Be creative, you hacks. Del Rio tries to roll up Ziggler, but it’s only for two; he misses the corner enzuigiri and Ziggler hits the Fameasser for a near-fall. Miz wants to thank Ziggler for giving him the opportunity to beat him, and says he’s not as good as the Miz is. Naturally, Dolph’s ADHD mixed with his easily-roused temper kicks in, and he goes for Miz rather than trying to get a victory over Del Rio. Goddammit, Ziggler. Miz escapes; Ziggler goes back to the ring and gets enzuigiri’d and armbarred and he deserves it. Ziggler taps.

Nice back-and-forth match that was overshadowed by Miz being…well, the Miz. But still, nice match. 2.5 Stars.

Del Rio’s ‘dude, what?’ smile and shrug to Miz is just hilarious. Alberto’s just here to win matches. We get told AJ’s been taken to hospital following Paige’s girly-push.

We recap the Brie/Steph thing from Monday, and I agree it’s an interesting enough storyline, but there better not be any situation during that match when these women actually are allowed to wrestle. Because I can’t imagine anything worse. Oh, and Michael’s Not-Wearing-Pants interview of the week was with Brie. Seems an odd replacement for Triple H; I’m not sure what it means symbolically. Also, how little faith does Steph have in her legion of lawyers that she’d rather fight than let this go to court? Or even try to settle out of court with Brie with their lawyers present? My parents are lawyers, and when I mentioned this situation to them, they honestly could not stop laughing.

In The Interests Of Keeping Rowan Away From SummerSlam

The Wyatt Family make their way to the ring. Bray asks why Jericho came back here. Is it because he knew Bray was waiting for him? Sister Abigail warned Bray about Chris, and that everything he’d say would be an empty promise. Chris Jericho lied to everyone and Bray’s probably going to beat him up for that, I guess.

Jericho shows up, and the Wyatts retreat, leaving Rowan to take care of this. They lock up and Rowan gets backed into the corner, getting headbutted and slapped around. Chris gets tossed under the ropes in front of the Wyatts. Michael says he doesn’t want to be so close to the Wyatts, and of course he does: if they attack him he wins by default. Rowan attacks Chris the second he comes back in the ring, stomping him. Jericho ducks a clothesline, but gets shoved way again and again, getting worked over more in the corner. Ladies and gentlemen: this is Chris Jericho getting crazy. And as I type that, Rowan is low-bridged and Jericho springboard-dropkicks him: damn it. Baseball slide to the Rowan, and Harper trips Chris up on his way back into the ring. The ref kind of catches it, and Harper’s look of wide-eyed innocence crossed with ‘I’ll eat your face’ psychoticness is hilarious. Harper’s ejected from ringside, but pauses so Bray can whisper sweet nothings in his ear.

Back from the break, Rowan was driving his fists into Chris’s head, and then pumphandle backbreakers him. Rowan remains firmly in control, keeping Chris down. Man, you’d think multi-time world champion Chris Jericho would be putting up way, way more of a fight. Finally, Jericho fires up, going after Rowan but gets caught with a crossbody, which Jericho turns into a tornado DDT. Kicks to the gut of Rowan, and Jericho comes off the second rope with a missile dropkick, but Rowan manages to hit a big spinning kick. Big boot to the side of Jericho’s head, but when he tries again he nearly gets rolled up. Step-up enzuigiri to Rowan, and then a dropkick to the head. Lionsault to Rowan’s back, but Rowan kicks out at two. Jericho gets run over by Rowan, and the big man goes for a fallaway slam from the second rope, but Jericho fights back, knocking Rowan down. He comes off the top rope and right into a big boot for a near-fall. Frisky Bearhug to Jericho, who manages to hurl Rowan into the corner, and then hit the Codebreaker for the pin.

Rowan often doesn’t display a great amount of interesting offence, as most of the time it’s stomps and slaps. This was one of those times, but they still managed to tell an interesting story. I assume Harper will be next, and then Bray can win without outside interference. 2.5 Stars.

This was just an okay SmackDown to me. Some parts were good; some parts were funny, but just not enough to make a really compelling show. Seven.

I won’t be here next week, as I shall be sunning myself in Sorrento, but the very talented RHETT DAVIS has agreed to shoulder the burden of that week’s report. I hope you enjoy; I shall certainly be trying to steal some Italian’s computer and check it out. Arrivederci!

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CB’s Slant: Why WWE Should Cut John Cena and Other Controversial Roster Trimming Ideas Fri, 01 Aug 2014 09:34:15 +0000 WWE has indicated that they are in cost-cutting mode and that they were going to make some tough decisions to save money and seemingly placate investors.

There are now rumors that more roster cuts will be made on the talent side, and so I thought now would be a good time to offer up my own audacious (and admittedly unrealistic) wish list for WWE roster cuts.

1. Cut John Cena: Like him or hate him, John Cena is always there. I mean always, as in he never backs down, he is always at the top of the card, and he never gives up … his spot.

While WWE looks at Cena as their biggest moneymaker and their top draw, I look at him as their biggest moneymaker and top draw … by default.

Think about how many times Cena at the top of the card has hindered other potential big draws from fully realizing that potential, and you’ll see a pattern that indicates (at least to me) a huge loss in revenue over the past few years.

The reason I say this is that more big stars means more big money, and because Cena has been so consistently used as their safest choice of a cash cow, there haven’t been as many breakthroughs at the top as there could have been.

Cutting Cena is obviously not going to happen, but my point is that WWE has created a situation where Cena’s presence causes a real logjam that prevents the WWE machine from really moving forward.

I bet you can list at least 5 wrestlers whose growth has been stunted over the years by Vince and the writers always sticking with Cena, and just think how much more money could have been made if that wasn’t the case.

2. Cut Randy Orton: Just like Cena, Randy Orton is (mostly) always there, and he’s another character that is more stale than most. Unlike Cena, I don’t think Orton really draws any money or interest anymore, and so it’s time to cut costs and say goodbye or at least shuffle him down the card to the point where he isn’t blocking someone else from emerging as a fresh new moneymaking draw.

3. Cut the Writing Staff: Overpaid, underwhelming, and ultimately vetoed by Vince anyway.

4. Cut Michael Cole and Have Jerry Lawler Retire from Announcing: Cole probably makes a ton of money for what he does and he and Lawler lose money for the company on a weekly basis (along with Vince being in their headsets) by failing to promote the wrestlers in the ring and the tasks at hand. Keep JBL and put him with Renee Young and call it a day.

These are just some ideas for potential bold roster cuts. Sound off with your own thoughts on my picks as well as your own ideas in the comments section below!

That’s all from me — CB.×250.jpg×120.jpg

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WWE Monday Night RAW LIVE Results For 7/28/14: John Cena Responds Mon, 28 Jul 2014 23:39:45 +0000 As we continue on the road to SummerSlam, tonight on RAW we hear John Cena’s response to Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar. Also, Stephanie McMahon has invited Brie Bella to RAW. Is Steph traumatized for life following her prison stint? Follow along to find out.

With All This Talk of Victimizing, Someone Better Call Detective Benson

After a recap of last week’s important events, John Cena came out. Cena said normally he would share in the crowd’s enthusiasm, but last week Plan C was what he hoped it wouldn’t be, and that is Brock Lesnar. Cena said that The Authority wants the WWE Title off of him so badly that they hired a mercenary to take it off him. Cena said there were boos and cheers, because quite frankly some of the WWE Universe wants to see Brock Lesnar beat the hell out of him. Cena said Brock Lesnar is the most devastating force in the WWE. He destroys who he wants, when he wants. Cena said Paul Heyman was right about something: At SummerSlam, he will get the beating of a lifetime. He’s going to get his ass kicked. But he won’t lay down. He will fight, and go to SummerSlam and beat Brock Lesnar just like he did in 2012. Cena said he doesn’t want to know what happens to the WWE Title if Brock gets it. Brock does what he wants, when he wants. And he doesn’t know who else can stop him.

Paul Heyman came out. He said at SummerSlam, his client will conquer John Cena and take the WWE Championship. Heyman said Cena spoke some might big words for a man that is about to be turned into a victim. Heyman said Cena has taken beatings before, but he’s never been victimized. Heyman said Cena should ask The Undertaker, but no one has seen or heard from him since Wrestlemania. Heyman said Cena is on the defensive, but his client is on the offensive. Heyman said after SummerSlam, Cena is going to be conquered.

Cena brought up passion. He said this is life, just like ECW was Heyman’s life. Cena said he loves this place and what it represents. Cena said Lesnar has no passion for anyone but himself. But what separates him from Lesnar is heart. Cena said Lesnar is going to have to beat every last ounce of it out of him if he wants to take the WWE Title away from him.

Cesaro came out. He said that even though him and Heyman have gone their separate ways, he will not let him insult his friend. Cesaro said Cena is a walking billboard. He said Cena must get his shoes from k-mart and you can’t wrestle in those, but Cena also just can’t wrestle. Cesaro challenged him to a match and Cena accepted.

Yes, Another Good Cena Match

The match started back from break. Cena took down Cesaro and went to a headlock. Cesaro escaped and went to a headlock of his own. Cesaro caught Cena mid air and hit a tilt-a-whirl backdrop. Cena escaped a bodyslam and hit a hurricarrana, but then caught an elbow from Cesaro in the corner. Cesaro landed some punches on Cena then knocked him off the apron with a shoulder to the gut. Cena charged back in the ring and landed some punches. He went for a bulldog but Cesaro threw him away.

Back from break, Cena went into CENA MODE. But Cesaro countered the slam with a DDT for two. Cesaro went for the Swing but Cena pulled himself up and went for a pin that got two. He followed it up with a powerbomb. Cena went to the top but Cesaro knocked him off and caught him with a boot to the face. Cesaro then hit his suplex from the apron to the inside. Cena caught Cesaro with an elbow in the corner and went for a DDT but Cesaro countered into the Swing. Cesaro applied a version of an ankle lock but Cena countered into the STF. Cena then hit a fisherman suplex and Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena went for the AA but Cesaro held the ropes. Cena then lifted him to the top. Cesaro knocked him off and went for a crossbody but Cena rolled through and went for the AA. Cesaro landed on his feet and connected on a boot to the arm of Cena, then tossed Cena in the air and hit an uppercut but only got two. Cesaro went for the Neutralizer but Cena countered. Cesaro hit a boot, then Cena, then Cesaro to knock Cena down. Cesaro went to the top, but Cena met him up there and hit the AA off the second rope for the win.

WINNER: John Cena

Backstage Steph told HHH she doesn’t think she can get the smell of prison out of her nose. And she doesn’t know if she can do what she can go out there tonight. Randy Orton came in and complained about not getting the Title shot at SummerSlam. HHH said that as long as Roman Reigns is in the picture, he won’t get it. Orton said he would take out Reigns tonight. HHH said Reigns is facing Kane. Orton said he has a problem with Kane, and now he has a problem with HHH.

Why Do I Feel Like Most Women Are Like This In Real Life

Paige came out. She said sometimes her emotions get the best of her. She still considers AJ her best friend in the whole wide world. What she did last week was deplorable. Paige said she saw someone who took her Title. But she will never do that again. AJ came out. She asked if she thinks anyone is buying what she said. AJ said she knows why she is mad. AJ said she doesn’t play little girl games. If she has a problem with someone, she will let them know to her face. Like a real woman. Paige said she is her friend, and if she doesn’t believe her she is crazy. AJ asked what she called her. Paige said she didn’t mean to call her that, or make fun of her mental health. AJ said she misposke and it happens to the best of us. AJ attacked Paige and tossed her to the outside, then ran her into the barricade. Paige jumped over the stairs as AJ stared on from inside the ring.

No, This Isn’t A RAW Replay

HHH and Stephanie McMahon came out. The crowd chanted “jailbird” at Steph. HHH said they have been through good times. But he said he was disappointed and disgusted at the WWE Universe last week when they laughed at his wife for being arrested last week. HHH said he can’t believe they laughed at her being handcuffed and thrown into a cop car like a common criminal. HHH said he will never forgive us. HHH said Brie Bella antagonized his wife and that she was asking for it. But it was all a simple mis-understanding. HHH said the charges were dropped except the assault and battery charge, which Brie Bella refuses to let go. HHH said they asked Brie here tonight to put this all behind us. Steph asked Brie to come out and instead got Chris Jericho.

Jericho came out and said he wanted to let Steph know how bad he felt, via a song. Jericho started singing the Cops theme and then the crowd finished it. Jericho said it is okay to be a jailbird nowadays. He said this is why the WWE Network was created, to watch her get arrested over and over. Jericho said HHH has stood buy his little flower’s side through and through. But he asked why HHH didn’t leave the arena with her. He said HHH must have found out what Jericho has known for years, that Steph is a no good, bottom feeding, trash bag and then HHH cut him off. HHH said Jericho should focus on Bray Wyatt. Jericho said he is, and he wants Bray Wyatt now. HHH said Jericho will have to wait til SummerSlam. Seth Rollins then came out and attacked Jericho with the MITB briefcase. HHH said that was his opponent for tonight.

Didn’t Rybaxel Break-Up?

It’s The Usos and Dolph Ziggler vs Rybaxel and The Miz. Dolph went after Miz early but Ryback tagged in. He hit a splash on Ziggler and tagged in Axel. Axel hit a dropkick then went to a headlock. Ziggler escaped and Axel missed a splash. An Uso tagged in and the action spilled to the outside. Where The Usos took out Rybaxel, then Miz ran away because he didn’t want to take a shot to his moneymaker. Back from break the heels were working over one of the Usos. Eventually Jimmy escaped from Miz and tagged in Ziggler. Ziggler hit a neckbreaker on Ryback followed by an elbow. Ziggler planted Ryback with a DDT but Miz broke up the pin. One Uso took out Axel. Miz dropped the other Uso on the ropes. Miz tried to distract Ziggler, but Ziggler escaped a powerbomb and hit the ZigZag on Ryback for the win. Xaiver Woods, Kofi Kingston and Big E watched on.

WINNERS: The Usos and Dolph Ziggler

Bo Dallas came out and told R-Truth that he can never be undefeated like him, and that he’s lost a lot of matches. But Truth can one day win in life, if he BO-lieves. Bo took down R-Truth then did a victory lap. Bo came back in and Truth rolled him up to pick up the win. Bo congratulated Truth but then attacked him and landed multiple hard punches. Bo finished it off with a DDT.

Rusev and Lana came out. She talked about the flag being a symbol of our dominance. She said it is now just a faded symbol of our once great nation. She ripped on Obama and Bush before Jack Swagger and Zeb came out. Zeb said the American Flag is a real flag. He said it represents many things for our nation. But most of all it represents all the men and women that fought and died for our freedom. After a “We the People” Swagger charged the ring and went after Rusev. Rusev eventually took control and tossed Swagger into the barricade. Rusev went for the Accolade back in the ring but Swagger applied the ankle lock then knocked Rusev to the outside.

Adam Rose made quick work of Damien Sandow, who was dressed in a spacesuit.

No Kane Match As Advertised? Yeah Okay I’ll Live

As Roman Reigns made his way to the ring to fight Kane, Randy Orton attacked him in the crowd. Reigns took him out then hit a Samoan Drop on Kane in the ring. Orton came back in but ate a Superman Punch. Kane then hit a chokeslam on Reigns and left the ring. Orton then went to work on Reigns. He landed multiple kicks in the ropes. Orton tossed Reigns into the steps a couple times. Orton then hit a DDT off the barricade. Orton slammed the head of Reigns into the steps. Orton then took apart the announce table and hit the RKO. It didn’t break the first time, so Orton hit a second one and it did break.

Diego beat Fandango. El Torito, Summer Rae and Layla distracted Fandango.

Naomi and Natalya defeated Cameron and Alicia Fox.

Who Didn’t See This Coming?

Chris Jericho vs Seth Rollins. Both men brawled to the outside before Jericho regained control in the ring. Jericho hit a suplex. Jericho then caught Rollins with an enziguri kick to the head followed by a kick to the gut. Rollins recovered with a dropkick. He went for another but Jericho caught himself in the ropes. Jericho tossed Rollins to the apron then hit a shoulder tackle from the second rope to the outside.

Rollins had control back from break. He hit a splash in the corner. He went for another but Jericho moved. Jericho hit some some shoulder tackles followed by an axe handl off the top. Rollins countered and game back with a neckbreaker. Rollins hit some headbutts followed by sending Jericho into the turnbuckle. Rollins went to the top but Jericho crotched him. Jericho back body dropped Rollins off the top rope then hit a crossbody for two. Both men exchanged punches before Rollins connected on a kick to the gut. Jericho came back with an elbow but missed the Lionsault. Rollins hit the corner powerbomb. Jericho moved out of the way of the Curb Stomp and got a roll up for two. Jericho went for the Walls but Rollins got to the ropes then hit an enziguri kick. Rollins went for a springboard but Jericho caught him and hit a Codebreaker.

The lights then went out and The Wyatts then appeared in the ring. After a beatdown Bray hit Sister Abigail on Jericho.

A Prison Rules Match At SummerSlam? 

Steph came out and said getting arrested is a life altering experience. She said all of her business partners and shareholders can’t look her in the eye and they can’t think of her as nothing more than a common criminal. Her children are getting teased at camp and can’t have play dates anymore. Brie came through the crowd and said she had heard enough and wanted to get to the point. Steph said she asked her here to ask Brie to drop all the charges. Steph said no one deserves this. Brie said as far as she is concerned, Steph can go to hell. Steph promised to treat Nikki fairly going forward. Steph said she would give Nikki a raise. Brie said she would accept that as long as she agreed to her demands too. Brie wanted her job back. Steph asked if she would drop all the charges if she did that. Steph agreed.

Brie said she wanted one more thing, a match at SummerSlam. Steph agreed and asked what kind of match. Brie said a match against her. Steph said she hasn’t competed in over 10 years. Steph said she will give her any match except against her. Brie said she would see her in court. Steph said this was all ridiculous and started to break down. She said she couldn’t stoop that level. Steph finally broke down crying and agreed. Steph then slapped Brie off the apron and said that at SummerSlam, she would make Brie her bitch. Steph celebrated but Brie came back in the ring and attacked Steph. Finlay, Jamie Noble, Joey Mercury and HHH came out to break it up.


Opening Segment, Cena/Cesaro: The opening Cena wasn’t bad Cena, it wasn’t great Cena but I thought he did a good job of sounding serious during his promo. He didn’t resort to corny and stupid jokes, and sold the seriousness of his match with Brock Lesnar at SummerSlam. Paul Heyman again brought the goods. And the Cena/Cesaro match was very good. They did a good job protecting Cesaro, essentially making a “Super AA” be the reason that he lost. Cena was no slouch in the match either. A good opening 40 minutes of the show.

Paige/AJ Segment: This gets a hit because I like that they are letting these two develop some kind of feud. Paige is starting to develop a little bit of character. And seeing both women hand out some physical beatings two weeks in a row is different for the Divas Division. Maybe a No DQ match at SummerSlam? If any two Divas could pull this off, it would be these two. I like that the WWE is actually giving two really good Divas some time to develop a really feud.

Roman Reigns/Randy Orton: The WWE did a good job of here of making people care about Orton/Reigns. Orton’s beatdown of Reigns was a good way for him to get some more heat heading into their match at SummerSlam. Sometimes you have to make the top guy look weak and vulnerable to sell a match, and they did that here with Reigns. It’s something they haven’t done with Cena, which is why people don’t like him.

Chris Jericho/Seth Rollins: The two were having a good match before the ending. Pretty much everyone saw the ending coming from a mile away, so it kind of took away from my full enjoyment of the match. Maybe I would have liked it a bit more, but it kind of seemed like they didn’t fully get out of second gear during the match. It was still enjoyable, but not as good as you might expect from these two.


Bo Dallas Losing: Part of me thinks the WWE did this just so Bo Dallas didn’t pass The Undertaker in terms of wins in a row. Hell, you could even argue this was a worse decision than having Undertaker lose at Wrestlemania. Let someone that matters beat Bo. An R-Truth win over Bo will mean nothing in the end. Let Bo keep growing as a character, then have him snap over someone that matters more when he loses.

I don’t know where to put the Stephanie McMahon/Brie Bella segment. I didn’t like that it was the last thing on RAW. And I thought some of Brie’s acting was awkward. But it is tough to deny that this doesn’t have some heat behind it. And once again, Stephanie McMahon played her role great. I think that is why I’m actually enjoying some of this angle.

I thought this was another good show. It had a couple of good matches and did a good job of building to a lot of matches at SummerSlam. I’m giving the show a 6.

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka×250.jpg×250.jpg

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JC’s Top Rope Report: Why Brock Lesnar As WWE Champ Is Best For Business Mon, 28 Jul 2014 21:12:19 +0000 We are only a few weeks away from the Brock Lesnar/John Cena match at SummerSlam. The match itself should be just as good as the first one. And when you add in Paul Heyman cutting Brock Lesnar’s promos for him this time around, and being able to sell the match itself, the build should be a little better.

People who aren’t happy about John Cena as Champ again need to remember that this wasn’t the original plan. If you believe everything you read, this was suppose to be Daniel Bryan vs Brock Lesnar. But Bryan’s injury forced a change of plans. Lesnar/Cena, however, didn’t disappoint the first time. They offered a very physical brawl that we had not seen in the WWE for quite some time. It’ll be interesting to see if the No DQ stipulation is added this time. If it isn’t, I’ll be interested to see what kind of match Cena and Lesnar have this time. You can’t hold Lesnar’s last match against him. He was working with a broken down, badly concussed Undertaker for most of the match.

But we can talk about the match itself all we want. What everyone has been talking about is the likely result, Brock Lesnar leaving as WWE Champ, and what will come after. Brock Lesnar NOT winning the WWE Title would just be stupid on a number of levels. First of all, it would kill any momentum Brock had from ending The Streak at Wrestlemania. We can argue about how Brock has been booked since his return, but losing at SummerSlam would be the biggest mistake of all. If it were up to me, I would have Brock Lesnar undefeated right now. I also wouldn’t have had him fight HHH three times. I would have done Rock/Brock at Wrestlemania 29 (no Titles on the line).

Since Wrestlemania I have come to be okay with Brock Lesnar ending The Streak at Wrestlemania. Having Brock Lesnar end The Streak, then go on to win the WWE Title in his next match, will make whoever beats him a huge star. Brock Lesnar winning the WWE Title right now is the best possible option the WWE has. People already don’t like John Cena as Champ. Randy Orton shouldn’t touch the Title again if it were up to me. Batista is out promoting a movie. As much as we all love Roman Reigns, Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins, I just don’t think either of them is ready for a Title run. Reigns is improving but he isn’t ready to take over the, no pun intended, reigns as the top guy in the WWE.

Brock Lesnar as WWE Champ will help elevate the Title. Lesnar can assert a reign of terror over the WWE as Champion. Yes, I know Lesnar has a limited number of dates he works. And some people won’t be happy with the WWE Champ not on TV every week. But I think it is a plus. It makes seeing the Champ and the Title get defended feel like a special occasion. It can draw people to the Network. Want to see the Champ and see him defend the Title? Subscribe to the Network.

We know that Lesnar is wrestling at SummerSlam, and one would have to think that Lesnar will also be on Night of Champions. If I could, I would talk Lesnar into working the Hell In A Cell PPV. Who wouldn’t want to see Lesnar fight in a Cell match? The question becomes if you really want to let Cena lose three times to Brock Lesnar. Because that is what has to happen. You can’t trade wins and losses. You can’t have Lesnar lose at SummerSlam then win at Night of Champions. I would even listen to the idea of Lesnar just destroying Cena at SummerSlam in a 10-12 minute match. If you don’t want Cena to lose three times, you could always throw someone else out there for Night of Champions. How about revenge for Cesaro against Heyman. I wouldn’t even mind Batista fighting Lesnar. Anything that would get me Cena/Lesnar inside the Cell. That’s the big money match to me.

Now I’m sure Lesnar won’t be on every PPV this year. I would keep him around until Hell In A Cell. He’s probably taking some kind of break in the fall. How do you make up for that? Well, you would hope that it is a possibility Daniel Bryan is back by then. If he can’t, I think it would be a good time to introduce Sting. Especially going into Survivor Series, where we can all dream about the possibility of a War Games match: Sting/Cena/Amborse/Reigns vs HHH/Orton/Rollins/Kane. I know it is an absolute pipe dream, but it would be one way to keep people interested in the product while there is no Champ around.

You could bring back Lesnar for the Royal Rumble if you want. But the appeal of that match is the Rumble itself. It will always be that. Maybe you have a Sting singles match at the show. But Lesnar isn’t necessary for the Rumble. Assuming the WWE keeps the same Network subscription schedule, those won’t be due until February anyways. You have Lesnar come back and win the Elimination Chamber match. Then, he defends the WWE Title at Wrestlemania against presumably Roman Reigns (although if Dean Ambrose gets hot he may be tough to keep down). Then you have the transition to the new face of the WWE and a new Champion to usher in a new era.

Brock Lesnar becoming WWE Champ will be good for business in the long run. It will help re-establish the prestige of the Title that has been lost recently. Because Lesnar won’t appear on every show, it will make seeing the Champion a special occasion. It’ll feel like the late 80s/early 90s when the Champ wasn’t on every show.

There will be people who won’t be happy with another part timer as Champ. But this is a different situation all together. Lesnar winning the Title and just dominating everyone that stands in his way will make whoever beats him a new star. With The Rock, it was a publicity stunt by the WWE to try and get main stream attention. And The Rock didn’t put anyone new over in the end. He “passed the torch” to Cena, even though Cena had been the man that point for almost 8 years. Lesnar is a different beast all together.

But who knows, this could all just be wishful thinking. I mean, John Cena could beat Brock Lesnar at SummerSlam. They did it once, who says they can’t do it again. But the WWE can’t be that dumb right? RIGHT?

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka

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You Book It! – Roman Reigns Run To WrestleMania 31 Thu, 24 Jul 2014 01:01:25 +0000 You Book It - Roman Reigns


Another week and another chance to book your own WWE. If you’ve watched WWE in the last few months you’ve surely noticed the rapid rise of former Shield member, Roman Reigns.

For weeks it seemed as if Reigns was moving quickly into a match with WWE COO Triple H at SummerSlam. Now it appears his path has switched to a match with Randy Orton. Does that mean the WWE is pulling back on Reigns’ push? Or have they decided to take their time developing this top new babyface? Was SummerSlam too early to push him into a main event spot when it looks as if he’s the front-runner to win the Royal Rumble?

What would you do with Roman Reigns? Keep him on course or maybe shift him in a new direction? Or maybe insert someone else into his spot? Maybe another returning former superstar? Book It below!×120.jpg×250.jpg

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THE RAGER! A Super Early Summerslam Kickoff Show (Roman Reigns, Bray Wyatt, John Cena) Wed, 23 Jul 2014 15:00:53 +0000 Missed me? Yeah, me neither. Let’s just jump into it and get this over with, yes?


Fandango vs Adam Rose
Apparently Rose doesn’t share Fandango’s enthusiasm for triangles…he’s probably more of an octagon fan.

Cameron vs Naomi
They couldn’t have just buried this match on Smackdown where no one would ever see it?


Usos vs Wyatts
A 2 out of 3 falls is a good way to end a feud and this feud has kind of suffered from too much of a good thing. Their matches have been fun to watch but the market has been flooded with it since they first faced off. I would’ve liked for the Wyatts to have actually won the tag championships at one point, especially with a face team like GoldStar waiting in the wings. Also, let me go ahead and say something that may get some negative feedback: I can’t stand Eric Rowan. I don’t know what it is but every time he’s tagged in, I find myself wandering on my laptop until Harper comes back in. The head-fisting thing he does is the dumbest thing I’ve seen since the camel-clutch/accolade.
Good match, let’s move on already.

John Gruden was spotted behind the commentators, does the guy ever go out in public without wearing some sort of visor?

AJ vs Paige
Aside from a botch or two from Paige, it was a fun match to watch. It wasn’t the masterpiece of Natalya vs Charlotte but that feels like an impossible high bar most Divas matches will never come close to.

Rusev vs Jack Swagger
Apparently this feud was cancelled after Lana’s rant which is weird because this is the first time something was broken or ruined and it wasn’t Swagger’s fault. It’s a shame too because this is the most over Swagger has ever been and probably ever will be. I also want to point out the trainer tending to Jack Swagger’s “head injury” by shaking Jack’s head. His medical school must’ve been online.

Dean Ambrose vs Seth Rollins
Okay so the match itself never happened but I had to title this segment something. I really love the video package, I just wished it was saved for whenever their actual match happened. This segment was the biggest and best example of this being an unnecessary in-between pay per view for Summer Slam. As much as I love these two, we need more meat in this story and not just one guy jumping the other every week.

Chris Jericho vs Bray Wyatt
Wasn’t completely impressed with this match. It was slow and felt mostly one-sided until Jericho pulled off the miracle win at the end. Maybe it was because I was expecting too much and built it up to an impossible extent in my head or everyone realized it was Battleground and decided they didn’t actually give a crap. It’s funny that Lawler is still mesmerized by Bray’s spider walk, you don’t have to be possessed to do it, just do some DDP yoga a few times a week.

The most shocking thing about all this is that Jericho actually won a match this soon after returning.

IC Battle Royal
Clearly WWE has found a winning formula when it comes to battle royals but they really need to pace themselves because Kofi is going to eventually run out of ideas. I would still like periodical check-ins with Bad News Barrett, seeing as how he did kinda get over by just talking…even if his promo got extremely real extremely quick. Would’ve been nice if Ziggler got the win just because it would sort of assure that we would have something to do in the near future. I guess it makes sense for Miz to win, help put over the new version of his character and give him more incentive to wake up super early and do crappy radio promotions that no one else in the company wants to do.

John Cena vs Kane vs Randy Orton vs Roman Reigns
A whole lot of “meh” in this match other than the Roman Reigns highlight show. Honestly, it was a fine main event and would’ve been a lot better if we didn’t get the exact same Cena finish that we got last month at MitB. He hit Orton with an AA on-top of Kane, the only difference is Cena had to actually pin someone this time. I get that Cena was going to win this, I’ve come to terms with it, but at least mix up a little bit. Even if they’re not going to mix it up, at least take a break from being lazy long enough to come up with a finish that isn’t the exact same as the previous PPV. If Cena wins at Summer Slam by hitting Heyman with an AA on-top of Lesnar, I’m setting everyone’s house on fire. Sure, it’s not the most original reaction to anger but then again, neither are Cena’s finishes.

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do twice,

The Answer: We at Classy Ring Attire have the most supportive twitter followers.×120.jpg×250.jpg

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